I asked a relative of mine to describe living life as a sociopath:
I might be a sociopath. When I make a nasty remark or hurt someone’s feelings, it is easy for me to blame my actions on the person I’m hurting. I lose patience with people that can’t do things as quick as me.
I am easily bored at social gatherings where all of the discussion is light small talk. I will use this time to get the most stoic person to laugh. This makes me feel I’m in control. I also use flattery to make people feel good.
I was a delinquent as a child and treated my teachers as tools for my pleasure. I would only stop the “torture” after they would cry and even then I felt a sense of victory when I could beat them mentally.
I was one of those “delinquents” as a youngster that never got caught. I regularly cheated and stole, drugged a kid I didn’t like, set another kid up for drug possession to get rid of him without killing him, and set fire to my father’s church, all in high school and all without ever getting caught. I’ve always been very good at putting on a mask. I learned early that it was important to charm the teachers and other adults in authority, which I was quite good at. Those were fun times. I felt alive when I did those things.
ReplyDeleteNow I walk through my day looking out at the world behind that two way mirror you mentioned once. I smile. I laugh. I put on the appropriate expression of concern when someone tells me a story about a death or a crisis or their latest tale of woe, but for the most part, I don’t give a damn. I am constantly analyzing people from my side of the mirror, noticing what makes them do the things they do and cataloging various insights away for potential use later. I see those things in people that they wish to hide from me and from themselves most of all. I’ve learned that if you carefully exploit other people’s personal dogmas, you can play them like fiddles.
Ironically, it didn’t occur to me to think that I might possibly be a sociopath until I came to this website. After reading the posts here, I did a little research about this curious “disorder” and what struck me most was the stuff about guilt. I’d never thought about it but apparently I don’t feel guilt, at least not the way other people describe it. After this realization, for a few weeks I went around asking my friends to describe what how they experienced guilt and I saw that what they were talking about was thoroughly alien to me.
Does this make me a sociopath? I don’t know and I don’t think it matters. It’s just one more perspective to add to my collection that might prove useful later. Thanks for the blog man. It’s been insightful. Several disconcerting personal mysteries have been cleared up thanks to what you and others have written here.
Im the exact female version of you, its ridiculous
Delete.
Wow, all that and with a bird-dick.
DeleteDaniel, you are probably a psychopath, considering the stuff u did as a teen. Charming authority while destroying people behind their backs without getting caught and doing it all for pleasure/personal gain is typical behavior for a psychopath.
DeleteHe is not a psychopath because psychopaths don't exist. It is not a medically recognised disorder. Psychopath is the term used by mainstream media to refer to violent sociopaths which are one of the most common types of sociopath however he doesn't really fit that description as he no longer commits any violent acts so he is just a standard sociopath.
DeleteYes, this is so true. It's because paths all do the same things, sociopathetic. I find a path and instead of them being offended like a regular person, they just try harder. Also, in the honeymoon stage, no one says the crap they say if they aren't paths. They say these things to see if your vulnerable with low self esteem. I love to pretend like I'm eating it up,then totally discard them. They try so hard not to rage, not expecting to be discarded first. Also, imagine all you have going for you is being a con artist with people emotions, what losers. Also they don't really yawn or dream, or have any future plans, asking them about emotions is particularly fun, since they don't know how to talk in depth about them. Truly, they can only bag a naive person, so the world gets smaller as they grow older, and look ugly and old. Just loneliness and bitterness, pathetic.
DeleteSilly one. Sociopaths have emotions... and plans... and dreams... sounds like you're the pathetic, lonely, bitter one LOL
DeleteRight. And there's nothing wrong with you for getting your jollies toying with what is basically an emotionally disabled person.
DeleteI can spot a sociopath. I have a 6th sense for the creatures. I once found myself being drawn to one like an intoxicating drug. I fought the urge to become his "victim", instead i played a the "game", until it was safe enough for me to get away. He thought i was impressively clever, and now thats what draws him to me. 3 years on i avoid the monster like the plague as he trys to seek me out. I make sure my door is triple locked and i say not one word to it. Im smart enough to know that i can't bargain with this pitiful creature. He is a changling, a figment of his own twisted imagination. I will always be the one that out smarted him because i binded my time, observed him like an experiment, gave him the rope and let him hang himself. Us normal people choose only what we "want" to see in others, thats the problem. Alongside with being ignorant to what the term sociopath actually means. All you sociopaths think you are all that. Your not. You can be sniffed out quite easily.
ReplyDeleteWell all these other people are negative to your comment, I agree. I believe myself I am in a midst of a sociopath and I'm using my guard to help myself prepare for what possibly may come. I'm reading up and when he is out of prison, I will be as prepared as possible. I cannot say for sure he is. Although there are many characteristics of him that are sociopathic there are some of his personality that are not fake, glib, etc. He has some love in him that I am trying to understand that maybe he isn't, just prison has made him the way he is. Lately it's been as if he isn't so fake. He tells it how it is, and been into emotion more. This may just be part of his scheme but I will look at this as more of a study project than a falling in love project.
Deletedear annonymous, the one who is awaiting her friends return from prison. a little piece of advice for you my dear, if you are really think you can trick this person , your crazy as hell. prison doesnt make you evil, unless your evil already. sounds to me like your not taking this too seriously. you best bet would be to leave it completely alone. he will destroy you, guarantere it.
Deleteyour a meth head
DeleteYou're*
Deleteyou think that sociopaths are evil, but their not! We live life normally, only some of us plot and destroy....and manipulate.
DeleteI believe in sixth sense. I have sociopathy. But I highly doubt that you are capable of spotting a persons mental issue using the sense, as that is in no way what the sixth sense refers to. It is not a spiritual thing, nor a matter of science fiction. It is a scientific process of being extremely talented in analyzing seemingly random factors and then processing them in a way to accurately (in many cases) predict what is to come, or how one truly feels or intends to act.
DeleteI was once in love with a sociopath. He was the most charming and charismatic man I'd ever known. He had strange sexual appetites that he would manipulate me into. He would tell me all about his violent thoughts and past violent ways. He slowly isolated me from my family and later introduced me to the world of Crack. He cut off my birds head with a pair of scissors as he laughed at how it reacted. He was so full of energy and did stupidly dangerous things, just to see if he could. He would throw anyone under the bus to not get caught and yet charming everyone ad he did so. He ended up breaking into someones house, getting caught and then committing murder. He still days it was self defense. Fascinated more about how people don't die like they do in the movies, than ever feeling remorse. He is now out, 13 years later and we have started talking again. He tells me about his undying love for me and how he's off the drugs and become a better man while inside. I admit that I thought about trying again bow that I've become a stronger woman throughout the years, and since I am aware that he is a sociopath. But I know it probably wouldn't last since the normality of a lasting relationship would most likely make him move on and leave me feeling shattered again. But I think to myself, if their mental disorder has no cure and nothing can be done for them, does that mean that they don't deserve a good life? That the world should shun them? It feels wrong to not care about someone because they were born with this illness. I don't know.
DeleteYou're a liar...you never did or experienced any of these things. But you want to be recognized. You were pretty proud of yourself when you wrote this, but I will let you know you're an idiot and completely ignorant. You'll always be a victim to society and completely unimportant... except maybe in your own imagination.
DeleteAnonymous:
ReplyDeleteCreature… Monster… Changeling… Those are awfully melodramatic adjectives to describe what may be nothing more sinister than a difference in neurological functioning.
Also, I find it curious that you decided to play the sociopath rather than be played by him. The way you described your “game” sounded… well… sociopathic. You make it sound like you became the predator and he the prey. So Anonymous, who was really playing who?
Well...
ReplyDeletePeople aren't aware of sociopaths, and just think Person X was angry, or made a teenager made an impulsive mistake. Give it some time. They can't hide forever.
In my younger years I became aware of sociopaths, and then from there I went back in time via my memories to spot sociopaths. I can't say for sure, but I suspected a couple here and there.
One of them tried to get me to feel sorry for him. Hahaha. I don't allow myself to get caught in their webs. I've been rarely caught off guard, and I hate flattery from people. To play the "game", is an insult to life. You live life. What is the purpose, to experience life by just manipulating consciously just because you can. It's meaningless, and weak.
It's all an illusion. IF they could only see the snakes in human form. When they do, they should know that snakes can only be snakes. It is their grand design.
Snakes needs external heat. Nothing personal.
My arrogance is supreme, my humility greater.
“My arrogance is supreme, my humility greater.”
ReplyDeleteAnd your incoherence is the greatest of all. What you are saying simply doesn't add up, in more ways than one.
Why would you, a self described “normal” person, feel the need to be guard if life is more than a game? Doesn’t sound very normal to me.
Also, why do you feel the need to trumpet your so called superiority over sociopaths in general? If they are so weak and vile and snake like then don’t they deserve your pity rather than your need to prove yourself better than them? Unless of course you actually believe deep down that sociopaths are superior to you…
What anonymous is saying is that those ofvus who have been used or tried to be used by a socialpath came to the realization that you/ they have absolutely no conscience nor the capacity to care for another human being so yes me personally I played the game back and got far far away. I do not recommend this for everyone and I am not saying Im smarter I just refuse to be a pawn in anyones game and I also know there is no worse revenge than someone who has no moral compass. Which is why I would just say stay away from them in the first place.
DeleteSociopaths/psychopaths don't deserve pity/empathy/forgiveness. Why? Because they will NEVER care, NEVER reciprocate, NEVER change and ALWAYS repeat same destructive behavior. They are the modern example of "having no soul."
DeleteWell...
ReplyDeleteDid I say I was "normal"? Perhaps I unknowingly did in my recent posts. Let's not assume because all people think they're different. I suspect.
Well. Just because I don't view people's lives as games, doesn't mean that other people don't view me as a game, or as meat. We should always be prepared. Even sociopaths must realize their footing when dealing with one another. No one wants to fall face first in to a pile of poo.
Mr. Birdick, I think your'e right to ask. It is so arrogant of me to "trumpet my horn", in some else's house. It is quite rude. I apologize. Unless...the owner is okay with people being somewhat free to express their thoughts-whether incoherent or not.
If I'm out of line--owner. Strike me with a lighting bolt.
And wouldn't a sociopath want me pity them? Why fall in to such vicious trap. In some ways I do pity their condition, and the situations that they make for other people. I skimmed a little bit of your post. You understand exactly what you did was wrong in some degree because you were very sneaky about some of things you did.
Sociopaths aren't weak in the social sense, and may serve some archaic evolutionary purpose. I want to stress they are very good at manipulating, very good at high stress situations that I myself would have hard times with. They can be used very efficiently such as disarming bombs, but if they're are left unchecked--who will stop them? Their morals?
Checking the black depths of my psyche....checking...checking and I think that if your'e talking about the amount of habitual crimes, lying, and the misfortune of others cause by the actions of sociopaths- --then yes Sociopaths are superior to me.
But seriously I'm not sure if feel superior, perhaps, I'm on a superior platform to judge. I don't know if this to be correct.
[This doesn't apply to sociopaths]
If you do the crime, be prepared for time.
Mess up someone's life, be ready for strife.
I think that's why I find it kind of repugnant-therefore I might feel superior.
I was referring sociopaths because snakes can shed their skin, such put on a new mask. Snakes need external heat from other sources, or people to manipulate, and their strike can be somewhat deadly--even if just a small scrape--with venom and all.
Great talking once again,
..
Very edgy, would you happen to have a superhero name I could look up? I'd like to see what 90s era antihero comic book you sprang from o great sociopath hunter
DeleteSo you provoked and hurt someone with severe emotional trauma, you should be ashamed of yourself. You went after and hurt someone who is afraid of other people just to get your jollies off. Who is the monster again?
mine was the 2nd comment, the reason why i played his little "game" was because like i said i was living with it. And after 8 months i knew this shell of a human being was potentially very dangerous. His gaze could quite literally instill the fear of God into certain people who avoided him, when his "friends" thought he was the life and soul of social gatherings. Sociopaths probably come in different degree's of severity, the one i encountered wasn't even fit to call human. It was a game of cat and mouse to him, it wasn't the actual mouse he wanted, he wanted to destroy me entirely as a functioning person. He once called me (i had to get rid of my phone) he was adament he wouldn't stop until i thought suicide was the only way out. How chilling is that!! I had to get the courts involved to get an injuction. So i will always thing a sociopath is a creature.
ReplyDeleteMr Birdick, as for your curiosity as to why i played the sociopath....well its simple, i knew what he was. When faced with a person who has no conscience,i was very aware that he knew no limits, i have to survive him. You may think that melodramatic, put having silently suffered at the hands of a sociopath they are indeed extremely intense people.I made it clear i did not fear him. However i secretly feared what he could do to my future. Thats why i took action. I noticed he couldn't be alone, he craved attention, he almost fed of it. So therefore i gave him none. He basked in the reactions of the people he upset, i showed absolutely no emotion to his face, (i sobbed privately) he told me he thought i hated him. I never told him i loved him. I was well aware i couldn't have him on an empathetic level, he was cruel in a lot of ways. So i chose to give or show him nothing. He still knocks my door, i ignore his very existance. To me he is shit and deep down i think he knows he is too. It is ashame that sociopaths roam this world, but its "feelings" that they prey on when they infact feel nothing. Give a sociopath nothing and he can take nothing. It was so hard not to feel for him, but i couldn't allow him to ruin me for his sport. I do find it fascinating how someone can be completely deviod of a conscience. I can't even imagine how that can be freedom? To have no real connection with another person, to not feel love in its truest form, to have to spend everyday faking it, just mirroring people to try and "learn" how to fit in with the empathatic ones. Wow thats anything but liberating...i'd find that insanely lonely.
ReplyDeleteTo “Almost a Victim of Sociopath” Anonymous:
ReplyDeleteI’m going to, just for shits and giggles, assume you are a woman. I believe that you have to protect yourself by any means necessary. Literally. I’d encourage any woman to destroy her attacker before he destroys her.
Mr Birdick, "almost a victim of a sociopath" is indeed a woman. lol. After reading your 1st comment i find it highly unlikely you would "sincerly" encourage a woman to protect herself by any means necessary. After my experience, i find thats what still attracts my ex, is indeed the fact he can't have my attention. It makes his game interesting, he has to think of different avenues to exhaust in a pathetic bid for my attention. Its hilairious peering through the curtain everytime he knocks the door and gets no response, his little face crumple's like a child that has just dropped his ice cream. He is actually very beautiful to look at and so so so charming, he is never short of passive admirers. Thats way too easy for him though. Its amazing all i had to do was silently watch him. It got to the stage where i knew him better than i knew myself. I knew the second he was telling lies, (yet this man could have easily charmed the birds out of the tree's) He was a completely brilliant actor. He didn't seem to have loved ones, more like posessions. I sometimes think if i hadn't have been able to see straight through him like a piece of glass, my ignorance may have been bliss. Such a beautiful creature to gaze upon, yet as ugly as sin inside. spooky. I wish i could have waved a wand and turned him from a wooden man into a real feeling person. Sociopathy is almost like a thief, it steals so much, soaks up so much energy. It is relentless in its pursuit's. I will always feel for him...but i'l never ever let him know that.
ReplyDeleteHey, you might have been a guy! ;)
ReplyDeleteThe way you describe your interactions with Mr. “Beautiful Creature” is almost poetic. You sound like you still have a little bit of a thing for him, at least on some level. Am I wrong? If I’m right, why?
And for the record, I actually did mean what I said when I suggested taking preemptive action. I am a man of pragmatism above so called principle. There are too many stories of women being murdered by former lovers/husbands who refused to accept that it was over. I say kill them first rather than wait around to be killed.
I'd go as far to say i utterly loved the bones off the man the "beautiful creature" Mr Birdick.(But i utterly detested him as well) The 1st time i saw him i think just for a split second, my world stood still. Like i said before, he was intoxicating. But his boasting and comedy routine never impressed me, i found it rather boring and lame, when others thoroughly believed he was fantastic. I instantly saw vulnerability in him. The louder people laughed with him and the harder he tried to win people over the more i felt sad for him. If he hadn't have been a sociopath i have no doubt in my mind that i would have spent the rest of my life by his side. I guess im a quirky person who is different to the "typical" woman. I was a free spirit wandering in no particular direction, with my own rules,(thats was his downfall actually, he entirely underestimated me) however we were drawn to each other in a mad sought of way. It fustrated him that i didn't buy his sugar coated "little boy lost act" yet he almost felt relief that he could drop the pretence around me. So he never had to pretend to be affectionate. I had no cuddles or words of endearment. He was content that i seemed to be another piece of his furniture. He acted as if he was annoyed that i stayed in character all day with complete ease when he had numourous disguises. I never needed to fake being me. I saw sides of him that even scared himself but i slept soundly next to him at night. I was extremely loyal to him yet not at all stupid. No matter how he tried he never broke me, in a twisted way he admired my resilience. I spoke to him in ways no other person would have dared. My fiery temper turned him on and i guess his ruthlessness did the same for me. I knew that wasn't at all healthy in a relationship. His very presence could consume me, he was picture perfect from head to toe. I'd catch myself staring at him when he wasn't looking and pondering why he was so angelic in his appearence, yet such a monster in his actions, almost like an illusion, a trick of the mind. My ear's heard different to what my eyes saw. When he was being his usual awful self he'd wear this wicked sly smile and it could make me orgasmic. However he had the ability to make me bubble inside with absolute pure rage. I've questioned my own sanity at times as to why i understood him. He found me difficult to manipulate lol, i never saw what he wanted me to see. It was like he stood naked before me and as disturbing as he was i accepted him for who he was not what i wanted him to be. Yet he was never going to be the man i needed in my life, so i stay away from him and have done for years, else eventually i'd become like a moth to the flame.
ReplyDeleteDid he beat you or verbally assault you? If not, then perhaps Mr. Beautiful Creature was your “missing” other half, your Anam Cara. Maybe the two of you were drawn to each other because you were in fact reflections of each other. Maybe you didn’t like seeing the ruthless side of yourself that he represented.
ReplyDeleteAnam Cara, hey that question is pretty deep for a sociopath ha ha. Mr "Beautiful Creature" was just what he was....hell on earth. Don't get me wrong i like different, i am different myself, but im gentle and nurturing. Sociopaths are just plain mean, i was never a reflection of him, more like his exact opposite. Anyway on that note, this site has been therepy for me and now i've got this off my chest i feel so much better. But im an "empathist" (if thats how it's spelt? lol) so i don't really belong on this forum. Im off to find myself a non physcho site. Mr Birdick you have however been a joy. Tinkerbelle x
ReplyDeleteMost people want their flattering preconceptions about who they believe themselves to be confirmed. Society (with a great big boost from biology) conditions them to believe in naïve notions of good and evil, right and wrong, which they then use to justify and flatter themselves while judging and condemning others. Affirming the stories they tell themselves about themselves is what matters most to them. They prattle on and on about meaning and purpose, but their actual purpose appears to be on the receiving end of perpetual ego boosts.
ReplyDeleteTake Mr. Superiority for instance. His first post was essentially about how much better he is than sociopaths. When he is confronted with his obvious arrogance, he immediately back pedals. After all, society teaches him that bragging about one’s self at someone else’s expense is bad, and heaven forbid he should do something that might prove he’s not a “good person”. So he retreats into pseudo-humility in effort to preserve his self delusion.
Ms. I Was Almost a Victim is another example. She was cool in her detached observations of her ex and calculating in the way she played him, all in order to simply break up with him. When confronted with her rather sociopathic approach to ending a romantic relationship, she waxes on poetically about her ex, revealing that she still has romantic feelings for him. We so often tend to fall for people who mirror us. When confronted with this obvious fact, she retreats all the way out of the conversation, stating (for herself mind you since she was the only one in doubt) that she is in no way like her horrible ex and that she needs to find a “non-psycho site”. In other words, she’s off to find those who will affirm her beliefs about herself.
Neither of these so called “empaths” ever got around to asking me a thing about myself, by the way. They were far too busy spinning webs of self delusion to be “empathic” about me.
In the end, the “empaths” and normals are tragically deluded about who and what they are. They brand those who don’t agree with them with labels like sociopath. (Sanity is a numbers game.) In the end, they are only naming what they fear most of all: reality.
I have read the following comments, much to my entertainment. It was amusing to read the the poetically dramatic rantings of the 'normal' people who faced the fearsome sociopath and survived. I think what I most enjoyed was Mr Birdicks responses. I find, when I come across Internet comment wars/discussions that the defender usually shoots himself in the foot eventually by crossing the moral boundary and stooping to the others level. I'm glad that your answers were always thought provoking and intelligent, and you wernt quick to insult and lash out. Way to keep yourself level headed. I always like to read a story with a happy ending.
DeleteGood luck!
why Mr. Birdick i think you are indeed correct. Well done. I was wondering when you would cut straight to your point. I studied English Literature and the pen can be mightier than the sword. Its amazing how terrible i can make someone feel with a highly emotive letter. I was indeed as horrible if not worse than my ex, but i am not actually a sociopath. We could very easily of ended up killing each other. And i was confident it wasn't going to be me. (And thats the truth) Making it very easy to sleep next to him at night, because i had a 12 inch blade under my pillow incase he tried anything stupid. So maybe i did him a favour. Ha ha ha When i left i made damn sure i'd leave a nice big dirty stain on his reputation, that would linger around him like a bad smell...and it still does, (he lost his very good job with just one phone call which i didn't even have to make) Its so funny when the chinese whispers start. All i had to do was tell the one person who i knew had the biggest mouth, and she pretty much unknowingly did my bidding. I sit back and relax in a distance place as the fire works go off. I am as my mother says "excellent at playing dumb" And i noticed very early on that playing dumb with my pretty face would let me get far in life, without the one who thought i was the village idiot even realising it. I am extremely calculating, i was the product of a narcissist who i absolutely abhor,( I actually look forward to her funeral). i learn't how to almost smell manipulation, and i'm as good as the rest of them at executing it. I have a mean streak that could probably send shivers down the devils spine. I can leave at the drop of a hat and not give a backward glance. I care for the ones i feel are worth it, so i currently only feel for one person because the rest of the people who have walked through my life are shit in my eyes. And i thoroughly mean that. I have a lot of rage bubbling beneath my surface im just extremely good at controling it. I can reduce a grown man to tears and feel really pleased with myself, Like i was once told its a dog eat dog world where only the fittest survive....and just for the record no i didn't love him i like to tell myself that. It makes the time i f##king wasted on the dick almost worth the effort. Ha ha ha. So who wants to date me!!!
ReplyDeleteImpressive.
ReplyDeleteAs a person who shouldn't even be in this position, I come to wonder to myself. . . .
Is the sword white and black, or simply black?
...depends who you are swinging the sword at...there's always room for grey.
ReplyDeleteGray is so beautiful, is it not?
ReplyDeleteMs. Anonymous said:
ReplyDelete"I was indeed as horrible if not worse than my ex, but i am not actually a sociopath."
"i left i made damn sure i'd leave a nice big dirty stain on his reputation, that would linger around him like a bad smell...and it still does"
"and she pretty much unknowingly did my bidding"
"i noticed very early on that playing dumb with my pretty face would let me get far in life"
"I have a mean streak that could probably send shivers down the devils spine."
"I care for the ones i feel are worth it"
"i currently only feel for one person because the rest of the people who have walked through my life are shit in my eyes"
"I can reduce a grown man to tears and feel really pleased with myself"
"its a dog eat dog world where only the fittest survive"
"and just for the record no i didn't love him i like to tell myself that"
"So who wants to date me!!!"
I just wanted to put that in context so people can understand the way I saw that single posting... Wow! complaining about a sociopath, but you seriously need to question your own being. Maybe you have your own sociopathic tendencies? Maybe even a psychopath (closely related). The way you were talking about sleeping with a knife under your pillow so you can be the first to kill if it comes to it... You are truly one scary chick. I personally would never want to willing put myself in a position where I had to make a choice like that.
To Life's Outcast Of Death:
----Yes, gray is nice, but a rainbow is breathtaking.
Interesting blog. I am an aspie. I was bullied by various scum when I was little... I don't know if they were true sociopaths or not... certainly they didn't appear to have remorse and did seem to enjoy it. Eventually in time I got a clue and lifted weights and the bullys left me alone.
ReplyDeleteSince then, I have run into the occasional sociopath (and in the most unusual cirumstances). On the one hand I kind of agree that sociopaths are people like anyone else and are born a certain way that is not their fault however... this type of neurodiversity can be dangerous to most other people. Can sociopaths be helped? Is there even a recognition that help is needed or desired? A imagine a sociopath might think, if they think at all about these things... what help I am naturally born perfect.
I guess mostly because of my past experience I strongly dislike bullies and sociopaths. The one great thing about them is that they are very easy to spot once you are aware. They are very natural acting liars. But they are not especially good at keeping track of the lies or knowing when they are being monitored for consistency, if one can play dumb well enough. When you don't act the way they expect you to there is often a deliberately abruptness in their behavior. And just in general I'd say their hallmark is meanness... especially sudden meanness... like as if they are going for a shock effect in addition to cruelty.
I feel if I wanted to be devious, I could really mess with them, really badly because they can be fooled easily. The problem is they will take it very far and will do things and go places one who is not a sociopath does not want to go. So I stay clear of them. I do know others that hate bullies and sociopaths and will challenge them... they will go right after them. Brave people.
Cool picture of Newtown High School btw. That was my high school in the 80's.
ReplyDeleteSociopaths are a disease, they are a plague on society and this world. Have sympathy for them, they will use you. Try to help them, they don't want it. They think normal people are a joke, and their weapon is taking your kindness for weakness. Their weapon against you is exactly what makes you a human being and them not. A conscience, a heart, empathy, and for lack of a better term, a soul. Never forget the reasons why they are what they are are the same reasons they are so dangerous. A normal person's biggest mistake is to ever impart "human" characteristics onto a sociopath. It's as dangerous as assuming a wild animal's behavior is "human." The behavior only superficially mimics human behavior but the basis for the behavior is completely different. To assume ever they will behave like a normal caring person is hopeless. They will use your empathy against you every single time. Perhaps medical science will one day understand and help these unfortunate individuals. However, to the average person, once you identify someone as a sociopath, treat them like poison ivy and just stay as far away as possible. Give them an inch, help them, care about them, feel sorry for them, love them, pay attention to them, and you will get burned. It's guaranteed. They are mentally ill and do not realize it. Anyone claiming to be a sociopath who states anything like, "I am a sociopath and I know what I do," IS NOT a true sociopath because that shows conscience and awareness of others' perception of them. Anyone claiming to be a sociopath who desribes their behavior as sociopathic IS NOT a true sociopath. True sociopaths have no interest in being exposed, not even to themselves. They are not aware of their mental illness, so claiming to be a sociopath is a contradiction. A true sociopath thinks NOTHING is wrong with himself. You only know them by their behavior and by the destruction they leave in their wake. Once you have the knowledge and can spot the patterns, treat one like a virus. Avoid all exposure. A "person" with no conscience is more dangerous than a person holding a gun.
ReplyDeleteThis is a good article about them and correct.
DeleteWhen you say sociopaths are not aware of what they are they just isn't true. Some may not be but I would consider myself a sociopath however I don't enjoy that label. To me telling someone that I have these urges and habits makes that much more of a rush. To bluff a royal flush when they know you only have a pair and to still pull it off is the ultimate. Similar to the way two sociopaths could go at each other.
DeleteMy daughter is in college and she thinks one of her roommates is a sociopath. My sister is a sociopath and I don't believe she has ever killed anyone but she has made a lot of lives miserable. Growing up with her was hell. It took a long time for me to sever all communication with her, I think she is possessed. Her eyes are empty. I have learned to put my mind into the sociopath so I could predict her next move. It's not a pretty place to be. I know there are different degrees of sociopaths, just like there are strong and weak Demons. Satin being the most clever of them all.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter has some insight on this too, and I believe she is probably right. The school is telling her roommate to go to a shrink or to leave back to America. Her roommate has chosen to go to a shrink. There is no room to move to a different dorm My daughter has 1 month left abroad. What will best buy my daughter time. I feel she is not safe. Does she play her game ?
I would just like to interject my thoughts on this conversation. I am in no way taking sides. I would just like to point out that not all sociopaths are crazy, delusional, snake-like beings.
ReplyDeleteSome of them/us just want to know why we can't feel anything.
I think it's a little bit judgemental of anyone to think that they are better (or worse) than someone who cannot emotionally attach themselves to anyone or anything, despite wanting to with every fiber of their being.
Some of these people that visit this site may come here in hopes of finding information about who or what they are.
Please try not to impose your beliefs onto someone that is asking for, or searching for help. It is counterproductive.
So, if I could ask you to refrain from including ALL sociopaths into your stereotypes. I would appreciate you taking my thoughts into consideration.
Sincerely,
Someone Searching
I'm living with a sociopath. Right now, I'm plotting my escape. The degree of damage that this man has caused in my life would take up the better part of ten pages. I'm not a youngster either, I'm 45 years old. I didn't see him for what he was 5 years ago and that alone is shameful. If any of your readers could tell me the best plan of escape, please let me know. I have a ten year old son and this man has reduced our lives to constant misery. We are penniless now and have nowhere to go( because he burned our house down.) Please help us.
ReplyDeleteRUNN................. I tried but mine found my family and messed me over he stole from me. He told themI was crazy and tried to put me away. more KEPT TRYING TO SAY IT WAS MY FAULT HE DID THIS BECAUSE I DARE I run away from him. Change your soc, your name... mine was so mad he followed me when i ran ... I know what they mean by evil because when ur with them they're children. Seriously if you have a good friend tell where you went make sure its someone he doesn't know or that doesn't like him. then move another state .
ReplyDeletehe made sure when i ran I couldn't go anywhere. He made me penniless so he's knows exactly where i was . Remember THEY ARE JUST PPL COLD TURKEY 1ST STEP TEN NEVER AGAIN.If yours is really nuts change your look.
ReplyDeleteSomething is deeply wrong in this world. Alot of people today, lack the most important innner qualities that are required, in order to be a caring compassionate, loving human beings, yet they claim to be "the normal ones.
ReplyDeleteSociopathy is a severe form of mental illness, and needs to be treated as such. It develops as a result of exposure to trauma, such as: neglect, physical/sexual abuse, and violence. Sociopaths are thought of as mean, viscious, cold, emotionless people, who are just freaks that don't get along with anyone and don't fit in anywhere. Sociopaths are very smart,clever, and such good actors, no one could spot one by looking. People in this world need to get real.Every person in this world,"the normal ones" included, can snap, go off the deep end, do bad things, develop a mental illness, etc. Don't think you are special and so different from us, who are mentally ill. You are us! You've been puttin on the front so long,about how "normal you are, you've come to believe it. I think most people in this world are after the same things. Love, family, security, finacial stability, pleasure. Sociopaths are after those same things too. So they watch people, they learn behaviors, and their acting skills become an art. The art of feeling, loving, having compassion, and having a consience. And they find their place in the world. What makes it so hard to live in this world is "the normal ones" who have the idea that someone died and appointed them judge.
Just to let you know, I have bipolar.
I agree that sociopaths are just people who are lacking heart and trying to mimic what they are lacking, in order to find a place in the world. If life delt me that card, I would be angry and manipulative too. I could understand how they would see emotion as weakness. But can't you imagine how empty and hollow their lives must be, filled with that much anger, since that's the only emotion that they can feel? I agree to be aware of it. don't try to shelter ourselves from a sociopaths manipulation. But how can we lose our humanity by outright hating someone who has all good things already taken away from them?
DeleteI agree that sociopaths are just people who are lacking heart and trying to mimic what they are lacking, in order to find a place in the world. If life delt me that card, I would be angry and manipulative too. I could understand how they would see emotion as weakness. But can't you imagine how empty and hollow their lives must be, filled with that much anger, since that's the only emotion that they can feel? I agree to be aware of it. don't try to shelter ourselves from a sociopaths manipulation. But how can we lose our humanity by outright hating someone who has all good things already taken away from them?
DeleteYou people sound incredibly overdramatic. You can't get attention so you post dramatic comments on the internet? How pathetic.. I was diagnosed at 14 with sociopathic tendencies and after turning 18 was diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder and manic depression, and my life is no where as near as sad as what y'all have exaggerated y'alls life's to be. Get a life.
ReplyDeleteThan you are lying,to yourself or others, but its never easy no matter how much pain you cause yourself or others. But let's pretend.
DeleteCruise by Alex Stofa
ReplyDeleteWhen retired airline pilot Mac Knight and counselor Lynn Baker plan their annual three month summer cruise to the Bahamas, Both Lynn's and Mac's past bring a new dimension into their plans and into their cruise.
In this fast moving page turner be a voyeur into the word of bigger than life sociopath Mac as he juggles living ghosts of his past with the promise of a future with Lynn. Be the fly on the wall as level headed Lynn, guided by her psychic childhood friend, deals with her own resurrected ghosts as Mac’s past unfolds before her eyes.
Their passion keeps their romance together. But is their passion enough to stand time?
Preview Cruise:
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/96859
I came to embrace my sociopathy as I grew older. I now see it as a gift to help me survive.In the beginning it is hard, you know you are different;but what is it? You are free of guilt and emotion, if you want to be. If you are grieving over a deceased pet, just tell yourself it's just a fucking cat/dog/whatever and let go of the feeling. You don't feel lonely. You know you can do what has to be done, when the situation arises, unlike other people. Lying, setting people up, even killing are just tools available to you. I come from an abusive world that most people can't comprehend. When I left home I saw how other families interacted. It was like having eaten rotten meat all your life and then experiencing a gourmet meal.I was at a loss for words; what would I be if I grew up in that environment? A psychiatrist once told me he was very concerned about my sociopathic tendencies and traits. I am actually the direct descendant of a mass murderer. My psychiatrist theorized that he must have been clinically insane. His daughter used to say that I reminded her of her father in so many ways. He once slashed a man's throat and threw the body face down in a muddy ditch. When someone came along and said "that isn't right leaving him like that"; he responded by saying "leave him right where I fucking left him or you'll join him."If you want to fit it you must learn to recognize certain social cues. People will think you are "weird", but in reality you can't feel as they do. Just as the very smart cannot fathom the very stupid sociopaths do not understand the fallacy of morality. I have little tolerance for others. I advise people not to try my patience, touch my shit, or interfere with my agenda. For a sociopath, love is an ethereal fantasy; no matter how much you want to be real it just will never materialize. I often wonder if this is who I am or end result of a very fucked up home life.
ReplyDeleteI understand, I came from a very abusive family, at 2 she, I will never call her mom, made me and my 4 year old sister walk to grandmas, we walked along the highway till cops picked us up. I had burn marks and had been sexually abused, luckily for me my adoptive family would be the same way, I hate change,lol. People always think I'm lying when I tell them my family is fucked up . I'm not.
DeleteI understand, I came from a very abusive family, at 2 she, I will never call her mom, made me and my 4 year old sister walk to grandmas, we walked along the highway till cops picked us up. I had burn marks and had been sexually abused, luckily for me my adoptive family would be the same way, I hate change,lol. People always think I'm lying when I tell them my family is fucked up . I'm not.
DeleteI also came from a very fucked up background,I hate most things, but want to understand me, I've loved 3 people, and hated the rest, there is no grey, only black and white. Good and bad.
DeleteI also came from a very fucked up background,I hate most things, but want to understand me, I've loved 3 people, and hated the rest, there is no grey, only black and white. Good and bad.
DeleteTo the so called sociopaths posting here.
ReplyDeleteA sociopath has zero empathy, remorse or regard for others. A sociopath would never take time out of their day to post on a forum about something like this. A sociopath takes these very words as weakness. Their arrogance is offensive. Yes, most of them have very high intellegence, but they are stupid in the sense of thinking that everyone they encounter is going to fall for their game. They are vicious predators, but their arrogance is their weakness. They take their victims intellegence for grantid. They know the difference between right and wrong, they simply choose based on their innermost fantasies. They are not strong-willed. Do not try to debate with me. I am right.
You are wrong, anonymous. "Strong will" is limited by the human emotional responses. You must be terrified, acting from a fight or flight response to show your true colors. The sociopathic mind is something you do not understand, despite your continued endeavors to review and post commentary on this site. This scares you, and several others on this "thread" into typing anonymous messages intent on stealing a spotlight. You do this because you can not face the problem personality that you have in your reality. You "play the game" as was stated. You keep the black park of the world as far away as possible because in your confused and "human heart", you know what great lengths are achieved
DeleteThrough the lack of conscience. We are far worse than you could imagine. However, remember we were created from the shadows. We were created by the things our eyes were forced to see, but our conscious mind refused to. People like you are not in the same world as us. You live, while we exist. However we exist without any limitations. The grey area does not exist. But your are arrogant for grouping us together. When your body fails you, remember that the man removing your kidney gets a kick from cutting you open. We are not easy to spot, until it's too late. But we can do good, so long as you tread carefully.
Good Luck in life, and do not get upset about the truth. I was respectful, i expect the same courtesy.
As a person diagnosed twice with Antisocial Personality Disorder (Socio/Psychopath is a horribly outdated and condescending term), I would like to share some of my insights. Before you continue reading this post, please open a new window or tab and search for "Antisocial Personality Disorder DSM" and read the official criteria. You will note that only a few of the many personality traits are needed for a positive diagnosis. Go ahead, do the search, I'll wait..
ReplyDeleteOK so now that you've seen the wide variety of traits, can you take into consideration how many combinations one could make? Someone could have the bare minimum number of traits, in all different combinations, all the way up to having every single trait (Charles Manson.) Many of us with APD do not posess all, or even half of those traits.
Now that you have this mathematical knowledge, it should be easy to see that those with this "disorder" CAN feel love or empathy. Many DO NOT enjoy manipulating others. Not all of us are pathological liars, narcissistic, or abusive. Some of us DO respect the law, authority, and have regard for the "rules". We don't all have delusions or grandeur. Need I continue? Do you see? (To the poster above who claims all "sociopaths" are incapable of feeling empathy, you are the stupid one, and it's spelled "granted", not "grantid".)
Some "normals" lie, cheat, steal, abuse, neglect, have addictions, break the law, disregard others, and commit murder. So if they need to be cautious of all "sociopaths", do I need to be careful of all "normals"? The answer is, YES! We all need to be careful of everyone, especially in this day and age.
The thing you need to understand is that APD is a spectrum. It categorizes an extremely diverse group of more specifically individual personalities, as described above. When you get down to the heart of the matter, you, the reader of this post, have "you disorder". And guess what? You have EVERY trait on the list!
We need to evaluate a person, whether labeled as "sociopath", "histrionic", "narcissistic", "normal" (no such thing by the way), etc., by who THEY are. As my fiance told me, no book (the DSM) can tell you who you are. Doctors told me there is no treatment, no "cure". But I'll tell you what, I have developed a level of understanding of things like empathy, love, and respect for others, and even gained the ability to experience them.
Some may say, "But you don't feel it the way others do". So, what, everyone except those with a personality disorder feels emotions exactly the same way, and we're just a bunch of weirdos? I'm pretty confident that some "norms" would feel very empathetic towards a situation that others would not. And they would care or not care to all different degrees, for all different reasons.
If you have/had an abusive, manipulative, or otherwise destructive person in your life, whether they have APD or not, it sucks. And if you have someone in your life who, overall, you are happy with, "disorder" or not, it can be the best thing in the world.
Please grasp the fact that we all feel and think about things differently. You will never find someone who thinks or feels "the same way as you do". The goal is to find someone who's personality works in tandem with your own, regardless of anything else. Love is what I think it is, what I know it is, FOR ME, and no one can tell me I don't "feel" it.
Now go live your lives.
That last sentence tugged at me hard. I just recently broke up with the only person I've felt a genuine emotion for. So much so that I actually revealed my disorder to her. Unfortunately, because of this consistent inability to feel the way she did. It quickly spiraled out, the last time I spoke to her, she said she was going to down a bottle of pills. All I could do was stare, my brain shutoff again and I was unable to find the correct response to the situation. I just sat there silent like always.
DeleteIm not the manipulative breed of Sociopath, at least I don't try to be. I am fully capable of arranging the mask and laying it out. For some reason everyone that I treat badly (in my mind at least) seems to adore me. While I cannot seem to connect with the one person I felt genuine love for.
Im tired of hurting people, It's not what I want to be or do. Things like this are what make me believe there is no God. I've shot down religion logically, but try to hold on to a little bit of faith to keep me human.
But this has pushed me far away from the condition, I got it in my head now that I am "bad for people." I should have let her go a month ago, I should have known I couldn't change. Now I've crashed another innocent person and it hurts my pride to know I continue to fail.
Whats a good man to do when he's marked with a curse that crushes anyone he tries no love.
I DO FEEL LOVE D****T, JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW DOESN'T MEAN I DIDNT!
Simple then, don't care. Every sleep is a small death, there is nothing but rest after you die so you can finally get away from all the people and their games, their irritating emotional responses like anger and sadness, and you can finally get away from all the noise.
DeleteIn the meantime, the people around you are your environment, and as a human you should mold it to suit you.
Humans are naturally violent, and hurting someone else in a social, financial, or physical way is a life affirming action for them.
Make friends, money, and relationships to stop people from attacking you, then enjoy life until you finally sleep for the last time.
Good luck, from one to another, tolerate people and enjoy life until you can finally sleep
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ReplyDeletep for varying lengths of times and a myriad of reasons. the ends do not justify the means regardless of ones thoughts.
ReplyDeletewhat bothers me is the classification of sociopaths as either amoral or immoral, or worse labeled as both. while sociopaths may lack the ability to feel or conceptualize empathy or emotions the way "normal" people would, it does not mean they are "psychopaths, monsters, inherently evil, or whatever derisive term one wishes to label them." any real "sociopath" understands (not feels) the importance of those close to them if not for the context of emotional connection, but at the very least (a tool) an extension of themselves and as such another way to interact (many say manipulate) their environment. sociopaths must put on a "chameleon mask" to fit in with societal norms so as not to be branded negatively and reviled universally by those who feel their "emotions" make them a superior individual or inherently right. There is certainly an evolutionary divergence for this, what I like to call sense of universal balance in any given species. an overly emotional and reactive being needs to be counterbalanced by a rational and purposeful being. ideally a healthy and balanced individual would have a little bit of both.
it disgusts me that any individual committing visible large scale atrocities, crimes or major/minor deviant behaviors get labeled under the domain of sociopaths. while I am sure this is true some of time; just as much, if not more can be attributed to emotional motives or irrational feelings/emotions that result in the same. you need to get off of your high horses and stop blaming all of the ills of the world on those who are biologically incapable of irrationality and a full spectrum of emotions.
i believe calling us monsters and creatures is very very cruel..
ReplyDeletewe did not choose the path we walk on, just as you did not choose yours. expand your vision please, shame!
and i do not believe you, who call us monsters, have any idea how hard it is living this way, how hard we try to perceive the world as you do, how hard we try to be normal and empathize out there..
thank you, have a nice day..
I read through most of these comments on this site, and myself as a sociopath would just like to say that not all of us are the prison type who are just out to hurt people for our own self enjoyment. I am 22 and after having several sessions with my doctor about ASPD "sociopaths" she told me that for me to have figured out at such an early age that I have a greater chance to have a normal life than the normal sociopath. Granted I do find myself using people for things often. Now that I know what I am I make aware the situation to the person who I feel I'm using so that they can make a decision on whether or not to go along with it or not. I'm not saying I'm better than the sociopaths that you all with bad experiences have met. But don't kill us off because of the bad ones out there. Some of us just long for a normal life and the feelings that most people experience. Judge us as you will, but there is some good in us. I'm in the military with a computer job and with my combat life saving training ive saved 2 different lives with that training on 2 random people not asking for anything in return and to this day not seeing them again. If you read this then thank you.
ReplyDeleteI agree ,not all sociopaths are evil. I am a 33 year old male, married for over ten years. I hurt those i love but for the most part i am not evil, i just cant feel.
DeleteI would guess that i hurt others no more or less than other people do. I just have no remorse for it.
I would definitively not recommend letting others know that you are a sociopath, recipe for disaster. That would be like going to church to announce you are an atheist. I use people to get what i want constantly. my reasons are selfish and to facilitate my lazy nature but rarely for malicious reasons. I may be a devil but i can love.
To "love" someone, for me, is to respect them and enjoy their companionship. That also requires a mask. The mask will slip. It is impossible to be the husband, father, son, and friend all of the time. It is exhausting to always wear a mask. sometimes i just want to be the hollow shell of a man that i am. To relax and to enjoy the "comfortable" that i call happy. non socio's do not view that as happy. That hurts the ones that love you and complicate things. My wife wants me to do things because i want to do them, not because i know that she wants me to. I do very little because i want to. cost benefit analysis is how my brain is wired.emotions play almost no part in the play. My advice for my kind trying to live a normal "healthy" life is to make the game benefit others even if for your own selfish reasons. I want my wife to be happy because i should want that. If that dont work then i want my wife to be happy because i may need someone that i can be myself around after i push the rest of the world away. if that dont work then i want my wife happy so i can have someone to cook and clean and help me raise my child. If that dont work then i need my wife happy because alone i look more like the strange creature that i am.
On an unrelated note, does anyone else have trouble acting normal for the first ten or so minutes of outside interaction every day. Most days i sit in my car and wait to watch two other people interact to see how i should behave, lol. I can never remember, years and years of it and it is still alien every morning.
Samieal
As a wife of a sociopath, I totally agree. I think it takes a special kind of lady that is accepting of you. I'm actually really glad that he let me know though. Because now I understand him better and I realize that everything is not always my fault. Sometimes... but not always. The knowledge has really enabled me to learn how to pick my battles. ANd I love my husband. He's dynamic and infinitely interesting. Good advice, Samieal.
DeleteI am really distraught reading this page and others like it. In the past I have lied and hurt people with little remorse. The only thIng I felt bad about was getting caught. But now I am working hard to change, trying to seek help, and there seems to be none available. "normal" people keep describing "us" as monsters to be avoided. Now I am completely turned off to any thought of finding help because apparently anyone I turn to will avoid me like "the disease that I am". Maybe those who have so-called real human emotions should spend more time trying to diagnose and help rather than bashing.
ReplyDeleteMy husband is a sociopath. But I love him nonetheless. I just accept him for what he is. I don't mind the embellished stories. I just enjoy the story. And it makes him feel good to think I believe him. He is exceptionally charming, but he has that "dark side". He's never wrong, even when confronted with evidence. (Which I don't do any more because he just gets pissed. So its pointless.) I've read all kinds of horrible things about sociopaths. But, I feel like if you accept someone for who they are; then you won't have problems. (Of course there are exceptions). For now, I'll enjoy being married to my sweet "rock star", "ex criminal", sociopath.
ReplyDeletePlus, I have borderline personality disorder so he looooves how obsessed with him that I can get.
DeleteI think you are just stupid! ALL OF YOU SICK FUCKS CAN GO FUCK YOURSELVES.
ReplyDelete*skips away
I'm glad your so high and mighty princess,I bet your a pedophile.
DeleteI wish I had a girl who indulged me in such a way...I find that I have a hard time connecting to any of the girls I date. And if I begin to let one in, she drifts away and she leaves
ReplyDeleteSociopaths are not completely devoid of emotion. Understandably, it is a common misconception for the average non-sociopath to make, as the average empath generally lacks the mental discipline required to restrain their own emotional hype long enough to analize and perceive the actual emotional activity of a non-empath without making any kind of premature assessment. In fact, that point alone is the primary reason for the comfort behind the mask. Let's face it. You'd also actually have to be a sociopath in order to be conciously aware of that. Just because someone doesn't care about you, doesn't mean there aren't people and things they do care about to some degree.
ReplyDeleteI was talking with my therapist searching for why I was so attracted to people with different breeds of sociopathy and out of my mouth it came: I envy sociopaths.
ReplyDeleteThe irony is, all of my partners envied me.
We both used each other but the major difference remained: I can bond in my dysfunctional way, she/they could not. I'd mourn for a good year, they, a few days, tops.
its crazy reading about all this iv only just discovered I am too a sociopath! and the thought of it is sending me into a depressive state. im 26 male and iv looked back over the last 10 years of my life and realised im actually a messed up individual. im 26 I have no friends and I hate it I feel very lonely. i used to hate it if someone didn't like me i could never understand why but now i know the truth i am a horrible friend, son, brother, boyfriend and definatly a horrible dad not that i ever go round being horrible to people obviously not im a sociopath.
ReplyDeleteso iv always considered myself to be an animal lover!! yet.... i flushed my live fish (too noisey) i brain damaged my hamster. threw a cat out of a first floor window threw a frog at a wall and other similar things. all things iv denied myself until now.
iv always considered myself caring!! lmfao really the truth is i only care about me. iv been with my girlfriend 5 years now and iv give her 5 years of hell. i talked her into selling herself because i honestly didn't care if she was sleeping with 200 men a week cuz every night she would come home with 500-800 pounds for me to enjoy. plus many more similar stories.
im an opportunist thief i wouldn't call myself a thief at all but if i gotta walk somewhere far and someone happens to drop a bike outside of a shop infront of me they are the ones walking lol.
i went to the doctor before discovering this myself and said "i need help i think i have a personality disorder i can be whoever i need to be to get what i want!" doctor give me anti depressants what a joke they are.
my symptoms are dramatically increased when drinking alcohol. is this the same for any other with this disorder??
last time i got drunk i was arrested for 3 different things i didn't do but the worst part i had my two sons with me age 9 and 10 who were taken back to their mum by social services. i only really cared that i might be heading back to prison.
now this all makes me look like a complete wanker but understand i didn't even know this was who i am till now.
is there any help for me im really looking to being a normal person that can keep a job and a girlfriend that doesn't have the urge to take drugs spend money get i debt lol i am a life ruiner and it needs to stop now but how please help.
There are about 7.1 billion human beings on earth. Each of us is different. None of us know exactly what it is like to be another human being. We are something like “hive mind” creatures such as ants, bees, or mole rats in our intense need to be around others of our own species, but each of us has an individual ego and consciousness. At least we perceive having a “self'; modern neuroscience seems to regard our actions and decisions made by our nervous system below our conscious level and our nervous system than constructs the illusion of consciousness as a way to help us function.
ReplyDeleteOn my conscious level I am married to a very empathic woman for 48 years. I have a very empathic daughter of age 47, married to another empathic woman. All my life I have felt different and “weird.” My wife asked me a few months ago, “Why are you reading so many books about sociopaths and psychopaths?” I answered, “Because I think I am one.” As I read the author's book, and as I more or less daily visit and read through this blog, I more and more analyze myself as a bit weird even in a place where I “sort of belong.” I have had close encounters with at least three sociopaths. Two were bosses. One was a cult leader who became one of the biggest white collar criminal in Oregon history.
Each of these sociopaths completely fooled me. I battled each of them. In the first case it was kind of a “draw.” In the second case – the cult leader – my wife and I destroyed him. I fantasized murdering him because he was so evil, but I knew I would never get away with it. He had stolen about a million dollars over a twenty year period. He failed to recognize that I was almost as sociopathic as he was. In the end I swindled him out of almost a $100,000, but perfectly legally. We defeated him in court.
In the third case, things are still up in the air. She is a high level administrator in one of the biggest public library systems in the United States. Recently I realized she might become the director. I am doing as much as I can (it's difficult) to make sure she never achieves that pinnacle as she is a person who can do a lot of damage.
I have decided to let people around me know that I am a sociopath and that they should be careful around me. I try to do it very carefully, providing them with just as much information as they can handle. It's kind of like a game. As has often been pointed out in this blog, most of the enjoyment we sociopaths get out of life is by playing games. It's complicated for me, as I am (as far as I can figure out without extensive professional diagnosis which I don't know how to get hold of in any practical way, exactly what I am. My guess which I have coined a neologism for is that I am a TRI-PATH. That it, I am 1/3 sociopath; 1/3 psychopath; and 1/3 empath. At the very least, I am as crazy as a hoot owl.
I'm a sociopath but I don't know what do with my life I'm just tried of hurting girls cause I want somethings real but I know this can't happen cause one I just lie to them and I can't control it and I get bored of them one of my dreams is to have kids but I think it's cause I want to control them I just don't want to do anything more damage my email xxammathanxx it's Google if u think u can help feel free to mgs me
ReplyDelete