In an effort to make the material on the blog more accessible to new readers and avoid having to repeat myself too much, I have been trying to think of ways to link to important or favorite posts. Taking a cue from every single media outlet in the world, I decided to do a 2009 retrospective. In no particular order, I like this post on mimicry, Bach, sociopath rights, any of the sociopaths in literature, but particularly Byron's Lara, Ruining People Iago style, Sexuality, Flexible sense of self, being "found out," religion, mob mentality, and different moral universes. Have I forgotten any good ones?
one of your links here got me to a word i never heard before, neurodiversity. seems i am a "neurodiversisist", lol. (and i have a slight lisp so that is no easy task!) although in reading about it, it seems the austies are hijacking the ideology as their own, which i am not too thrilled about cause austies bug.
ReplyDeleteCome now, you mustn’t be so coarse when speaking of austies.
ReplyDeleteThey might hear you.
Since I haven't bothered to go through the entire archive, this might've been covered at some point, but I have wandered for some time now how do sociopaths feel about funerals? It makes sense to think you've been to one or two and I'm wondering how do you cope.
ReplyDeleteThere tend to be, depending on the culture, sets of rules concerning funeral processions that cover anything from movement and spatial positioning to communication. I'm guessing you need to do a lot of mimicking during those occasions to avoid, in the worst case, social ostracism?
On a lighter note: have you ever had to worry about the "giggle loop" at funerals? Google it, you'll know what I mean.
I've laughed at funerals before and it never goes over well, but everytime the same image pops into my head, which is the caskest flying open and the body plopping up, turning to face everyone and saying: "how ya'll doin' tonight?" before chuckling in a woody woodpecker voice.
ReplyDeleteNo, that was a joke. I just mimick those around me to avoid any unneeded interactions.
That'd make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteMy mother is a sociopath. she was sitting at her mothers funeral I couldn't see her. But I could tell my stupid brother that she put in the kitchen two times (I took him out) and was always shoving soap down his throat was over there telling her everything I was wearing, who I was with and every moved I made. I believe she hated her mother and hates me. She ran over me with a tractor I couldn't walk for month, she ruined and ruins any relationship I care about. What about that emotion Hate. That is all she is full of. That and making people feel sorry and pity for her. I just want to know how to get out of her life. where she doesn't get fed any info on me. What can I do?
ReplyDeleteTo anon above, my mother is a pain in the backside also, i can relate to what you were explaining.
ReplyDeleteThe way i deal with her is like this.
I never cut ties completely, because she can at times prove useful. So determine if you might ever need your mother for anything, such as inheritance, if so keep up appearences.
Keep the realtionship at arms length, visit her once every 3 weeks or so, occassionally call, keep it brief and never divulge too much infomation about whats going on in your life, casual conversation works best. Do the odd favour for her, for example cut her grass when it needs doing, simple things like that. I suggest this because she might be more inclined to see you as an allie if she has a use for you and may back off terrorising you. Also appeal to her ego, flatter her once in a while, tell her that her hair looks amazing or her skin looks radiant (but don't over do it) else she will see right through you. Just offer her an olive branch at first so get the ball rolling, coffee or something like that. Sit and chat for an hour on even territory (not in either of your homes). Sometimes its easier with a problematic mother to accept the majority of the "blame" and to try and "sincerly" apologise. You may feel like spitting nails inside, but in the long term it will benefit you.
Unless your 100 percent that cutting her off completely is the only answer, then i suggest making a "friend" out of her. Like the old saying goes, keep your friends close but your enemies closer.
Tink :)
Sound advice Tink! Judging by a couple of other comments left by this anonymous momma’s boy, I suspect he’s far more attached to the drama than he cares to admit, especially to himself. But kudos to you nevertheless for sharing some common sense with him.
ReplyDeleteM.E. Why did you take down some of these pages? Also, where is the forum? if not, can you post other forums you may know of for "empathy challenged" folks? Ciao ciao
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Just reading up and wondering if there are degrees of sociopathy or if you either are or aren't. Like the ability to cry at sad movies, and care about others while being very able to cut those same people off just as easily.
ReplyDelete