Guest Post: Stepping Up

Part One Here

When I left home it was raining. I remember thinking I picked the worse day to leave. I didn’t really know where to go. Eventually I found an old abandoned car dealership with some homeless kids in it. I conversed with them for a while and they ended up letting me stay.

A Christian construction guy ended up giving me a job as a laborer, because he felt bad for me. I started making a little money which I spent on booze. When I first got the job I was excited. After a while I got bored and every time the boss left I would smoke weed in the back. I’m not really the hard labor type. I’m too lazy. Eventually I just never showed back up to work.

Opportunity always knocks. One of the kids started using hard drugs that I was living with. He would spend all day trying to make enough to supply his habit. I asked how much a zone (ounce) would cost me. He didn’t know because he bought it in small units to do himself. I asked him if I could go with him next time he was buying. He was excited thinking he would be mooching of my package.

I showed up and asked the guy what the pack would cost. He gave me a price that was a little over what I had left from working. I either had to go back to work, beg for money, or rob someone. I didn’t want to go back to that job, because it would be embarrassing to go back hat in hand. I have a lot of pride. Equally humiliating was doing what these low lives would do, beg for money.

I never did a robbery before this. I asked my new friends if they wanted in on it. They refused. They thought I was crazy. I obviously needed new friends. No wonder they were homeless. They had no initiative. I knew I was by myself. I wondered what to rob. People? Stores? A bank? I stupidly decided to rob the convenient store across from the abandoned dealership where we slept.

The next night I got my knife and put on my normal clothes I wear underneath some sweat pants and a hoodie. I made a mask out of a shirt by tying the two shirt sleeves together behind my head and my eyes were looking out the collar. I did this on the side of the store. My heart was racing. I knew I need confidence though. I was a little buzzed and I thought it would help, but it didn't. I walked around the corner of the wall and shut my eyes as I walked through the front. I knew all eyes were already on me because I had my shirt mask on. Once I crossed the door I opened my eyes and saw the clerk already running for the phone. I knew I had to be quick. I jumped over the counter and grabbed him by the hair yanking his head up and putting the knife to his throat. I told him to empty the drawer into a plastic bag. He told me to let go of his hair and he would comply. I knew he was lying. He was the hero type. I sidestepped him and yanked his hair so his head went into the counter. I started seeing red like before when I would get in fights. I kept slamming it. Fortunately I came out of it and he was only a little messy. He complied none the less.

The money from the robbery was shit. It was enough to get the zone, but it was way smaller than I thought you would get. The television is a lie. Regardless I returned to the dealer and got the zone.