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Friday, May 13, 2011

Agendered non-empath

From Eli Dupree:

I discovered sociopathworld.com this morning, while investigating cultural stereotypes about female sociopaths. I think you and your readers might like to read this graphic short story that I wrote a few months ago.

I'm an agendered non-empath, among other things. (I'm not trying to reclaim the term "sociopath", so I don't use it for myself, but I think I'm what you would call a "sociopath".) People don't generally categorize me as female, either (they categorize me as male), so I'm not directly affected by any stereotypes about female sociopaths, but I'm really interested in both feminism and neurodiversity. I also have Asperger's (that's right, I'm an aspie AND a non-empath - I recognize that those are significantly different things, and I'm both of them.)

The biggest single stereotype about femaleness and sociopathy that I found on the Internet was "borderline personality disorder is the female equivalent of antisocial personality disorder". That's complete bullshit, obviously, but it kinda illustrates how people think about it - they expect female people to be more emotional and more empathetic than male people, so their model for "sociopathic man" is a cold, heartless person while their model for "sociopathic woman" is a "crazy", emotionally unstable person.

So, basically, mass culture doesn't even have the language to talk about actual female non-empaths, because the stereotype is that they don't exist. On the plus side, that means there's no particular stereotype threat for female non-empaths in particular. On the other hand, the way our culture coerces apparently-female people into displaying empathic behaviors probably hurts female non-empaths a lot. I don't think it's healthy for almost anybody to live with a false persona all the time. (There are probably people who are just as happy lying all the time as they would be if they were open to people, but just being a non-empath doesn't automatically make you like that, nor does any other specific neurological condition I know of.)

- Eli

60 comments:

  1. Did the site totally malfunction for a couple of days?
    Who will revive this ailing beast?

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  2. Sounds like you really want to be unique. A autistic borderline bipolar sociopathic transvestite. What will we come up with next? This whole article is self analytical from the perspective of a confused girl who is looking to find herself. By diagnosing yourself and rejectig medical definitions, while quasi embracing the terms as defining yourself you show just what you are. Scattered. Confused. Rejected. Desiring to feel indifferent towards people ignoring you and thinking youre wierd. You are a sociopathic autistic. A feminist women who rejects her gender. A borderline......hmmmmm now we might be on to something. You are nothing worth mentioning. Just another one of societies rejects trying to scream from the bottom of the trash heap.

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  3. confusing..... but ok.

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  4. I think the reader just thought you complimented her, Ukan.

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  5. Backhanded compliments are the key to my charm.

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  6. ........................./´¯/)
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    ........('(...´(..´......,~/'...')
    .........\.................\/..../
    ..........''...\.......... _.•´
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    ..............\.............\

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  7. HEY GUYS I MET SOMEONE. NOW WHAT ARE THE CHANCES HE WILL TURN OUT TO BE SOME KIND OF PSYCHOPATH?

    hooraY FOR LIFE

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  8. sounds like he hacked ur blagger account mandusa

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  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  10. He is an actual shaman, of all things.

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  11. AND I THINK HE'S ALREADY HAD FAGGOT SURGERY YAY

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  12. I have hung with those types. Shapeshifters with a higher purpose. Some of the best in the field have a colored past. The path gives them an induction into something more than self-gratification and they learned to become energized through helping others. And they still get to be tricksters.

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  13. That's the vibe I get, Soulful.

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  14. I lived with a legit shaman for a while, brought up on the reservations and such. Very shady past, too. Colored, as you said :)

    But one of the most interesting people I've had the pleasure of knowing in person where I could both converse about philosophy, science, metaphysics, religion, and just plain old story telling.

    He was actually a pretty good dream reader. I don't dream very often, but when I do, it's usually lucid. Sometimes its nonsensical, but other times I sense there are layers to it of meaning, and he was very good at discerning such things.

    @Reader: Welcome. I really couldn't give a shit about nearly anything you said to be frank as you seemed all over the place and contradictory, but I do have a question.

    What is your drive?

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  16. When I was having a conversation with someone about having watched platoon again, the only scene I recalled that has a different interpretation for me this time, was the part when the old lady in the Vietnamese village got shot by Sgt Barnes for refusing to back off bitching about the unnecessary loss of her family pig which really pitched up the tension to the point where everybody (the lady's family VS the squad) got so pumped up that the fully armed soldiers were thinking about annihilating the whole village, kids women and all. What struck me was she seemed more hung up on the shot pig than the relatives that were killed or injured by grenade for taking too long getting out of the pit they were hiding in before the confrontation.
    The interpretation I had from that was that a woman is prepared to compromise much more collateral damage for much less in order to restore a personal imbalance.

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  18. i've met many wandering shamans in some countries its the only way for men to redeem themselves after jail in the eyes of their society where the only evil spirits are them

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  19. The ability to create masks, dissolve masks and go into another's pain and darkness is not for your regular joe. And at a certain level shamanism is about power manipulation, yet the goal is restore life affirming balance, even if the means is dissolution.

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  20. i talked to one shaman for ages and he told me he killed a man when he was young and that i should never go anywhere out of public view with one or i would get robbed and raped so from then on when i met them i tried to guess what they had done the gypsies in the same countries are similar but are usually the more prolific tricksters who use their beautiful faces and mythology to lure and drug and con and i met holy men who were violent drug lords too

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  21. This Eli Dupree character's desire is to be a performance artist and admired for his unique loud vision. My suggestion . . . Drop your labels. You are being a stereotypical psycho-babble mouth. Stick to images, expand your vocabuary.

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  22. "She loved the pig."

    That's not logical

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  23. what the hell is going on at SW?
    either i'm too whacked out to process anything right now or blah blah blsh/

    anyway, what is a shaman?! Some dude came up to me in the street and told me he should give me an off the cuff, free reading. I assume he was a 'shaman'. we went into the park (yes, very funny) and he touched me. Yes, he did. I'm not making this up. Namely, my hands. He then told me the secrets of the universe and i went away all the better. LOL. Why do i attract these people!?????
    WHY?!

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  24. You are thinking from your left brain. It's not cause and effect. It's attachment. To the right brain - she and the pig were one.

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  25. oh you removed it

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  26. not me, why do you keep the secrets of the universe all to yourself? Do tell.

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  27. My blog? I know Gag. No one seems to care apart from you and kesu. :(
    Aren't i a silly-billy. :-/

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  28. lol Soulful, i don't remember what they were. :(

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  29. u r very boring notme sociopaths in other cultures are more intersting than american psychos IRL becuase they have greater freedom to do what they please thanks to their anarchic political states

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  30. lol ok. ^ good comment. Keep it up.

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  31. Dupree Tha Ginger NinjaMay 13, 2011 at 11:02 PM

    Look at me! I'm sooo fucked up!

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  32. why are such fetishes so badly accepted in other forms. i.e. aspergers, autism, BPD's whereas in the guise of feminine quirks, there's almost universal benevolence and respect.

    hey notme

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  33. i am a interwebs psycho quake mf cos i am way more not boring than a dirty povvo foreigner in a gold headband an i can kills and rape people IRL to u no i am sooo badass i am the baddest badass in the universe

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  34. ^regarding the pig^

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  35. oh you weren't talking about my blog gag. :( I feel silly now.

    that wasn't me^

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  36. Ego-baiting here is just no fun lately with the arrival of so many stiff one-dimensional bores. Where are all the hothead psychos without a clue? Where's ickle Adam? Did his auntie finally lock him in the cupboard under the stairs?

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  37. @GagReflex: I enjoyed that book :)

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  38. replaced by geeks which was obviously inevitable

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  39. ^i think u mean replaced by bores well sw will never bore me into submission! never!

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  40. @Soulful. Do you agree that there's a silent moratorium on the rules of cause and effect for the female gender in our species?

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  41. I liked your blog, notme.

    Yes, I'm with Soulfulpath on this one, drop your label bandoleer and recognize the real battlefield.

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  42. Man, the comments tonight are full of baits

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  43. Where's ickle Adam? Did his auntie finally lock him in the cupboard under the stairs?

    Perhaps he's taking a temporary respite in a cage in a pig shop.

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  44. Sure is hard to understand collateral damage when my left brain can only search for futile causalities involving just about anything from lack of appreciation for hip-hop to having a decent toaster.

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  45. Gag "Do you agree that there's a silent moratorium on the rules of cause and effect for the female gender in our species?"

    I do not see this as a gender issue as much as a wiring issue, or where you place your attention. Yes, females are more prone to nurturing and can be blinded by making emotional decisions over a logical one. Logic has it limitations also.

    Any pleasure which expands the right hemisphere to see the bigger picture, and to take a step back is calming, and make sense of the chaos. Such as novels aka White Tiger.

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  46. not many people "actually" think u matter much, or even care about what u r, so why do u?
    it's just not a big deal.
    u r 1 of billions of unique people, of whom 90% are garbage anyway.

    if u suck, face it, and move onward with suckiness, if you "are cool with it", then awesome.

    if you are a sociopath, and it pleases you to cause pain,then no one will have a problem with u getting fuckd the hell up. soory, but that is how the world works.

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  47. the corniest thing about sociopaths is that they are so "fascinated" by their own "evilness", yet no one else could give a fuck, except when one gets in their shit....and it's time to pull the piece.

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  48. lol lil wayne..you're so gansta..

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  49. @Soulful. Granted, but outside of the self, the problem still exists. You will never know when you and your universe becomes the accidental victim or hindrance in someone's fetishsphere. Arming yourself to the teeth with all kinds 'character building' weapons makes you into a super freakazoid who's primary mission is to eliminate all that is a function of impulse. Medusa would probably see a 'loop' in this argument.

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  50. Not at all. Just moving along with the line of previous comments.

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  51. GUESS WHAT???? I, AGENDERED TOO!!! AND IT DOESNT MEAN IM INDIFFERENT TO ANYONE JUST MY OWN GENDER

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  52. GUESS WHAT???? I, AGENDERED TOO!!! AND IT DOESNT MEAN IM INDIFFERENT TO ANYONE JUST MY OWN GENDER

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