My bloke has this great analogy which I think he applies to every aspect of his life - "this guy wants to sell his car for £500, this guy wants to buy a car for £1,000, so I buy the car for £500, this guy is happy, and I sell it for £1,000 and this guy is also happy, and I've made £500 so I'm happy, everyone is happy. So why do the two guys have to poke around and find out about each other, now they both feel that they have been cheated and now no one is happy." This makes me smile, you cannot argue against it really, its very true and in fact the way that pretty much all business is run and how the world keeps turning. The major flaw being human nature, and that people do poke around and do get hurt, life would be so much easier if we didn't. Some aspects of sociopathy seem quite idealistic really.
I actually think the current obsession with the 1% and greed illustrates this well. Do people really feel like they are being ripped off? Yes, some people are profiting off our society/economy more than others, but the truth is that everyone is made better. Corporations are not evil. They make everyone's lives better. A rising tide will float all ships, and yet people can't help but be upset that some are floating higher than others.
Specifically in the case of sociopaths, I would even go so far as to say that most people who interact with most sociopaths are better off than they otherwise would be. Sociopaths are the grease making the world go round. We are fulfilling fantasies. We are arbitrageurs. We are sometimes the only ones listening to, caring about, and/or providing for your deepest wants and needs. Of course everything comes at a price. Is that what all the fuss is about? That the price is too high? Because that's an entirely different sort of complaint (really more like a whine).
Credit goes to Ed O'Brien, a researcher in social psychology at the University of Michigan, authored the paper. His theory is that our preferences are highly influenced by the moment of choice. And one particularly important moment is the end of an experience. O'Brien's hunch is that we fall for endings or last chances.
ReplyDelete"I think in everyday life we do have this expectation that we save the best for last," he says. For instance, when we go to a concert, the best song is often at the end, the encore.
Or, if we know the next installment of a favorite book or series is the last, like the last Harry Potter movie, for example, we get a little more jazzed about it.
"When people are given awareness that something is about to end, they're kind of motivated to make the most of that experience," O'Brien says.
But does this hold true even for something as simple as savoring a last piece of chocolate?
O'Brien says this awareness — that the whole experience was about to come to an end — made them value the chocolate more.
O'Brien says he thinks the last-is-best bias may extend to the world of romance and dating.
In a similar study, which he hasn't published, he and some colleagues asked people to rate a series of online dating profiles. And here again, he found there was a big advantage when a person's profile was introduced as "the last one" you'll see today.
"All of the sudden, that person seemed more attractive, more compatible," O'Brien says. People were about three times more likely to pick the last profile when it was framed as "the last" instead of "the next one."
Now, if Brad Pitt — or fancy Belgian chocolate — enters the picture, O'Brien says it's likely that the "bias toward last" would disappear.
But all things being equal? "I think it benefits you to be judged at the end."
"We are sometimes the only ones listening to, caring about, and/or providing for your deepest wants and needs"
ReplyDeletelolwat
"We are the music makers,
DeleteAnd we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams;—
World-losers and world-forsakers,
On whom the pale moon gleams:
Yet we are the movers and shakers
Of the world for ever, it seems."
-Ode, Arthur O'Shaughnessy
Actually, the whole poem might be a little on the nose.
DeleteMovers and shakers of the naive and sheep.
DeleteBut true - they are loosers and loners........how
sad.
That was an awfully anemic retort. I'd hoped for better.
DeleteAnd so if that's the sociopath's role, what is to Asperger's?
DeleteAnother disconnected set of ideas lumped together in today's post (not talking about Post).
ReplyDeleteEquating rationality with sociopathy and assuming empaths are irrational in decision making. Since when that is the case?
Making profit out of asymmetric information and disconnected buyers and sellers is not an activity limited to sociopaths, just about everyone does that. No business-minded empath would pass on the opportunity of making that $500.
As for the resentment in the situation once the buyer and seller realize how the middle man had so much profit from the event... The assumption above is that the furious buyer and seller were empaths. I beg to differ. Socio buyer and seller would have reacted similarly, they would also think that they are duped. Their reaction could be different and even worse than the empaths. Instead of turning inwards or simply complaining they could do things to put some real hurt on the middle guy in their anger.
Basically, this post is far too rosy and cheesy on the part of the sociopath. No one much cares for the middle men, sociopath or empath, and would take him out of the transactions if they could. Information technology and social media are affective constructs in eliminating 'quick and dirty service' middle men.
Specifically in the case of sociopaths, I would even go so far as to say that most people who interact with most sociopaths are better off than they otherwise would be. Sociopaths are the grease making the world go round. We are fulfilling fantasies. We are arbitrageurs. We are sometimes the only ones listening to, caring about, and/or providing for your deepest wants and needs. Of course everything comes at a price. Is that what all the fuss is about? That the price is too high? Because that's an entirely different sort of complaint (really more like a whine).
ReplyDeleteThis is what I have been trying to tell you and I have people ripping me over it. I talked to my g/f last night. She is like a cool hand on a forehead. She is the only one who can listen about these things without trying to fix. She is wise too.
I don't know how she got so much wisdom without empathy.That one I can't figure. However, there are few no people who have given me more than she. She is a literal angel, to me.
You must be still entertaining for her till she gets bored of your whiny useless phone-calls. The reason she is not trying to fix anything is she does not care. Your suffering is amusing (for now, but will soon get old).
DeleteEither she'll get bored or teach you a lesson soon. Wait till there is a conflict of interest and see which way your angel flies off on you. My point is don't load all your burdens on the girl, no one needs that shit, take care of yourself. Indeed she is the angel and you are the poison.
She wants to take off her mask to someone. Haven't you been following the story? Go back and read before you spout BS he he
DeleteYou have no ability to listen or learn. Keep on he he. Is ami your cousin amonica?
DeleteHOW am I not learning when I am healing and becoming alive, Genius?
DeleteMonica....... listen..... carefully... You ARE alive. Get it? Get healed already. Give me your address and I'll send you a certificate of alive. Or, would you rather have socio gf present one?
DeleteIf it were that easy no one would be messed up Genius
DeleteIf you would just get a therapist, you would stop spilling secrets to someone who will eventually turn them against you.
DeleteI hear you Anon. Thank you!
DeleteYou know she wants you to trust her. By definition, she is not trustworthy.
DeleteThere is very little correlation between empathy and wisdom. I don't know where you got that from.
DeleteWisdom is not the same as being compassionate. Wisdom doesn't necessarily result in compassion.
I'd even say that true wisdom, by necessity, doesn't have attachments.
I know that you will never, ever, understand this, though, and continue to believe otherwise.
I don't know why people think all sociopaths are callous monsters all the time. It is not true. Yes, they have no empathy or limited empathy. That is something one must remember. Look at ME. He is not a monster. He is as decent a person as anyone else. You people are too "in the box'. Get out of your old man cars.
DeleteI'm with Monica to an extent. I'm almost certain I'm a sociopath and I'm dating someone who is really screwed up currently due to her parents. She comes to me when she needs help because I'm the most rational mind she knows, I give her wisdom and say things that compassionate minds generally rebel against. I also make her happy because I make her think I love her even though I'm also dating someone else. A sociopath can make someone's life better, but I will leave her fairly soon, the question is whether the time of happiness is worth the despair of the loss she will feel.
DeleteIt is too late. You embarked on a journey and they inevitably end. It would be selfish not to think of a way to lessen the blow and give her things now that will occupy her time. Give her a reading list of your favorite books and music. You can also introduce a third person in the same way people introduce a kitten to a pair of older cats when one is going to die soon. Treat the preparation as if you had a small child and the child was never going to see you again.
DeleteMany people on here seem to swim in their feces.I see little change in the regulars. There are exceptions. However, people like Eden seem like they will stay the same until the earth swallows them. I am changing so who is the fool?
ReplyDeletesheesh, that maso-sado bitch is hopeless, we all know that. Let her go, change faster, you're boring us.
DeleteIf I am so boring why does everyone come out to play when I am around he he he
Deletespecial snow flake much?
DeleteWe are all special but most people are afraid to show who they are so they are boring
DeleteYou think constipation is boring, I agree, but I also I think diarrhea stinks. Middle ground, Monica, middle ground, take your shit to the middle ground.
DeleteMiddle ground is an old mans car
DeleteI have seen no change in you, Ami. There are certain words you use less, such as "pussy" and "mal n" but that's about it. Superficial.
DeleteAnd now you are trying to ride on some superiority magic carpet because you think you have changed?
Laughable.
Who is Ami?
DeleteI don't know.
Deleteoh well lol
DeleteWho is she?
Deletewho the fuck cares.
DeleteAmi was some psychic chick who was a nutcase.
DeleteI am glad she is gone. Stop fucking talking about her.
Deletetrue dat
DeleteWho the fuck keeps bringing Ami up?
DeleteEden
DeleteShut the fuck up Eden
DeleteLooks like you're the one with the problem, Monica. I haven't been commenting here at all, and for quite some time now. Whom ever it is taking up issues with you these days... they aren't me. I'm busy with other projects, and people who don't stir up my homicidal side. But you just keep on swinging at those shadows baby girl... for all the good it'll do you.
DeleteEden I guess you shot your wad with Erin lmao and smile
DeleteTheme Song for Monica
ReplyDeleteThemes, my screen does not show the links, I'm missing out on what you put out. Could you please also include the text form? Thanks.
DeleteClick on the name.
DeleteOh yea lol
DeleteOf Course Anon
ReplyDeleteTheme Song for Monica
Wang Chung- Everybody have fun tonight
Yeah, we all know that sociopaths (evil) does not like the
ReplyDeletelight. Too, bad. Common knowledge is that we are becoming
a narcissistic society and sociopaths are in for some heat.
Healthy individuals prefer to stay away from sociopaths -
your article is full of lies........
Please enumerate the lies for us.
DeletePsychopaths - Two world wars, mass genocides, dictatorships, the holocaust, mass, spree, and serial murdering/rape. Destroyed economy.
ReplyDeleteEmpaths - A screwdriver murder, occupy movement.
THOSE SICK FUCK EMPATHS!
Please explain how psychopaths are entirely to blame for all that, and prove it.
DeleteNot every bad deed is committed by psychopaths, you know. To say as much is to assume that empaths and normal people are completely all good, blameless, and never do anything untowards, ever. Do you really think so highly of yourself that you think you are infallible?
Things ain't so black and white, yo.
Yes, normal people cause harm and destruction rarely, or annually. They do not harm others frequently, as the psychopath does.
DeleteDon't feed the trolls. Everyone who studies or has studied psychopathy, knows what you are trying to sell is bullshit. But if you think 1% of the population rules the world, rock on with your bad self.
Delete"annually"?
DeleteLol.
I'm not a troll, and of course sociopaths do more damage than most. I just think it's lame to act like 99% of the population is blameless for countless monstrosities.
If that was true, why is Jesus a thing?
You are not to smart.......are you ?
Delete1%? Are you serious? It's true that sociopathy is extremely rare, but many people have sociopathic traits and harm people too.
Deletebut many people have sociopathic traits and harm people too.
DeleteDing ding. And you just proved my point.
Many killers, rapists or thiefs aren't sociopaths. Getting rid of the sociopaths wouldn't bring peace to this world, far from it. I'll give you an exemple ; Civil wars. Many men kill harmless victims, rape women, kill kids. Are they sociopaths? Most of them aren't. The world is cold and sociopaths aren't the reason for it.
DeleteOooooooh the mobile friendly format is back!
ReplyDeletehello haven and sw from frankfurt f
ReplyDeleteWhat happened to your Hank and Harv charade Frankfurt? You don't even miss your dawgs boi! What's dat all about, yo?
ReplyDeleteLol Fizzle
ReplyDeleteFrankfurt escapes when I am not watching. Hi Harv. Hi Hank.
ReplyDeleteNew video fro Sam Vaknin
ReplyDeletehttp://youtu.be/DqV7qrKq0BI
Is SW.com bait to for the last few sociopaths to come out from the closet?
ReplyDeleteI've never really cared much about sociopaths or corporations profiteering. As long as you aren't a complete asshole, I don't care if you're insanely rich. (Donating to charities to look good certainly helps.) Maybe that's because I'm a bit of a financial conservative.
ReplyDelete"A rising tide will float all ships"
ReplyDeleteIf that's a quote, I've never heard it before. I'm keeping this in mind for my own political debates, bro.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_rising_tide_lifts_all_boats
ReplyDeleteKyle Towns, this is where it originates from; it's just an economically contextual aphorism.