Monday, December 17, 2012

Everyone on the autism spectrum

This NY Magazine article, "Is everyone on the autism spectrum?" has some pretty funny moments, but this is probably the most relevant. In regard to the difficulty of making psychiatric diagnoses, particularly amateur ones:

Men have caught on and, in a kind of inverted gaslighting, begun to describe themselves as having Asperger’s as a way of controlling their spouses. “Having Asperger’s-like syndrome does not give you Asperger’s,” says David Schnarch, a Colorado-based couples therapist. “Having a big belly does not make you pregnant. I’ve not seen a single case of what I would consider to be diagnosable Asperger’s. But I have seen any number of cases of wives accusing husbands of it, any number of cases of husbands claiming to have it.” It’s the new ADHD, he says. “The wife doesn’t want to accept that the husband knows what he’s doing when he’s doing something she doesn’t like.” Schnarch recalls a man who phoned him the day before a scheduled initial couples session and announced that he’d just been diagnosed with Asperger’s. “As soon as this happened,” Schnarch says, “I knew I had difficulty.” He contacted the referring therapist, who said he’d suspected the man had Asperger’s because he said things to his girlfriend that were so cruel he couldn’t possibly understand their impact. As far as Schnarch was concerned, it was an all-too-familiar instance of ­sadism masquerading as disability. “If you’re going to perp, the best place to perp from is the victim position.”

I like the part about big belly not making you pregnant -- PCL-R, anybody? And the flipside of the coin are the self diagnosers who need a diagnosis to give them a sense of ... antisocial belonging?

130 comments:

  1. When women say things to be purposefully hurtful, they're just being women. When guys do the same thing, they have to hide behind a diagnosis?

    Interesting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i don't need a diagnosis i need a straitjacket a stage and a mike ;)
      1shrink asked me why i'm not in jail another if i'm not affraid to go to jail (36years old no criminal record)

      Delete
    2. I've never met a guy that was intentionally hurtful that hid behind a diagnosis. They may have hid behind their false bravado, in that way that real men just have thick skin, so you should man up and take the hurt.

      Delete
  2. Thinking I had Asperger's, despite being a cunning and ruthless manipulator, 24/7, allowed me to avoid responsibility for being a malignant narcissist.

    After I eased into the idea that I had a problem, albeit a somewhat more socially-accepted one (Asperger's) allowed me to consider that maybe there was something more going on.

    It wouldn't surprise me if a lot of the people that say they have Asperger's are self-deceived narcissists.

    ReplyDelete
  3. There are 3 basic types of personalities, or clusters.

    Cluster A, B and C.

    If people would learn to recognize their specific type, and to identify the rest, they would know how to deal with social situations, without having to label themselves 'Autistic' because of a lack of knowledge on their part.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I consider most of these 'disorders' symptoms of a larger problem.

      Delete
    2. They are symptoms of a larger problem. A proud few determine what society should be like and it is up to everyone else to make themselves fit the mold. Some people are just wired to live differently and when poverty or circumstances force them to be another way, you get a disorder. Once someone becomes disordered everything that they say and do in some way highlights the problems that made them that way. Of course no one gives a fuck one way or the other outside of professional curiosity, so they are forced to up the ante to get the attention they need. It really is not rocket science. Why do we still have disordered people? Short answer is there's no money in a cure.

      Delete
    3. I kind of like what you are saying here. It is the order that is all screwed sideways to begin with. I just had a flashback to the Island of Dr. Moreau. What a great read.

      Delete
    4. Personality Disorder Clusters are about the silliest way of clumping disorders that there are. The clusters are utterly meaningless.

      Delete
    5. Its useful in that it highlights the link between different traits in the same cluster.

      For example, it illustrates how its likely that an individual diagnosed as a Narcissist will also show characteristics of other disorders such as the Histrionic or Borderline, which are in the same cluster.

      In short, its practical.

      Delete
    6. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    7. I know all about the Clusters thanks. And I disagree.

      http://www.downwardspiralintothevortex.com/2011/05/cluster-me.html

      Delete
    8. This system is intended for persons who are unable to accurately place others in a social setting, therefore making interaction... difficult.

      I can see how it is flawed in that certain traits overlap, also, its superficial.

      Then again, what's the point in trying to interact with someone who makes it difficult in the first place?

      If you feel the need to assert some kind of superiority then you're clearly overcompensating for something.

      Delete
    9. How to spot a manipulator?
      That's the real question.

      Delete
    10. Take relationships real slooooooooooooow!

      Delete
    11. Its probably not a real problem, manipulators.

      They only serve to expose weakness, those who still cry about it are the ones who are not willing to admit their weakness.

      Delete
    12. Right, some enjoy the games of manipulators.

      Delete
    13. The question is: How long have YOU been crying?

      Delete
    14. There is no need for tears.

      I understand the wolf's purpose.

      Delete
    15. My teacher was the Australian Psychologist, "Alfred Adler," and he would disagree.

      Delete
    16. Implying his opinion is of any consequence.

      Delete
    17. Not for you - you're a legend in your own mind

      Delete
    18. And it feels great.

      Delete
    19. Well, please, enlighten us with your profound knowledge. We're waiting........

      Delete
    20. I just told it.

      The wolf exposes weakness so that you will recognize your mistakes and learn from them.

      If you choose to sit and cry about it and complain about it day after day then you'll stagnate and not even the wolves will want you.

      Delete
    21. Who is the wolf?

      Delete
    22. Do you even follow?

      This proves that you're just being contrary for the sake of being contrary.

      Delete
    23. If it is the manipulators in your 1:35 post I guess my question is "Why do you associate with them?"

      Delete
    24. Can you comprehend that 3:12?

      Delete
    25. 3:12 forget it - I would only get lies. Bye...

      Delete
    26. I think I can now recognize the 400lb shut in that believes we can only learn from wolves. Also, I don't have daily cries. You are projecting.....but, alas, I have faith in karma.

      Delete
    27. I'm just saying that its a good idea to learn from our mistakes, is that so bad?

      Its not healthy to dwell on the negative, you have to look for the silver lining... you'll find it.

      Delete
    28. www.youtube.com/watch?v=e88Zd4zuqII

      Delete
    29. Anon 12:19
      "I'm just saying that it's a good idea to learn from our mistakes, is that so bad?

      You mean that is ALL you said in the above posts? You are brain dead!

      "It's not healthy to dwell on the negative, you have to look for the silver lining...you'll find it."

      Isn't that a "negative" remark to assume I have not found the silver lining? You are brain dead!

      Delete
    30. Anon 12:19
      There is a part of me that finds this all funny
      as I have always found that malignant narcissists are so blatantly stupid.

      Delete
    31. Thank you Doctor, but I'd prefer you keep the pills.

      Delete
    32. 12:18
      Is that what happened to you? Pills?

      Delete
    33. I disagree with your diagnosis, Doctor.

      I'm going for a second opinion on that.

      Delete
  4. Some people self-diagnose out of sheer boredom. "I am sooo bored all the time and don't care about society... Maybe I am a psycho?!" Then all of the research they do is focused on seeing themselves that way. I know a guy who prides himself on being an asshole, but his mother whom he lives with at age 35 will not put up with it so one day he reads about Asperger's and boom! Finally found his diagnosis. He loves to tell everyone he has it and blame that for his "explosive temper" as he calls it. In reality he is just a smartass who thinks he is a genius because mom was able to buy his way into med school, and the only time his temper "explodes" is when a certain person is around him whom is 100 pounds lighter than him and even less inclined to violence than the asshole. If it is not the one guy he has beaten before or if he doesn't have his mother there to hold him back, the only thing this guy will get rude with is a cheeseburger.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon 408
      Your post is the best of the day. I loved it.

      Delete
  5. Good article M.E.
    As I see it, diagnosing anyone is very hard, because no one can fit a description completely and many disorders have common symptoms. Also it's hardly possible to get into one's head to fully read him/her. And, most importantly, even if you have a disordered brain how can your brain be disordered in a similar way someone else's is?!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. So, we heard from a few who tend to not trust diagnoses but are very curious in that direction anyway. I was hoping this curious bunch would take a shot at understandiing the underlying psychology of the mom and kids-murderer, Adam, who made major history.

    In my first attempt I thought this must be a mercy-killing. I feel that this thought has the bias that I am still trying to find a twisted heroic thinking behind a hugely evil result. Now I am speculating (after learning that Adam's mother had arguments with the school and decided to home-school Adam) that Adam may indeed have killed all these people out of anger and hatred.

    I sure was hoping your thoughts on the motives behind the cops tell us what went on in there. Mee, aren't you a young one? What is yoru take on this?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. not 'behind' meant to say 'before'

      Delete
    2. Well, I don't know much about him, but I'll try.

      So, we know that he killed many children, their teachers and his mother. Which means that we can safely assume it wasn't Adam's mothers idea to use her son as a tool. Why he killed her? There are few possibilities:
      a.) He didn't wanted her to see what he was planning to do. It could make his mother very sad.
      b.) He was annoyed by her, so he decided to kill her as a bonus or his mom was the trigger which made him do it.

      We don't know why he did it, but if we will call another mass-murder Breivick for help, we can assume that Adam wanted to highlight a problem. Maybe he left a note somewhere, maybe not. Maybe he wanted to show that guns are bad and children aren't safe. It would explain his suicide (Neither Holmes or Breivick did that).

      Suicide can mean that it was something personal too, but we lack information about it atm.

      If not, there's always substance abuse.

      That's all for now, I'll think about it a bit more :-)

      Delete
    3. *it wouldn't explain his suicide.

      That suicide complicates everything.

      Delete
    4. Maybe it wasn't a suicide? What if one of the cops saw what Adam did, went to psychosis of sort and shot Adam?

      Delete
    5. Disgnosis is he's an animal who could not control himself. It happens. There were signs for sure but people like their worlds to be nice and neat. Makes things easier that way. The ostrich defense takes hold so you can go on about your merry way instead of wonder wheter womething is seriously wrong. "My kid is just fine. Don't worry about those disturbing songs, shows, and things he's into. He hides it in his bottom drawer. I know becuase I am a good parent and I know everything he does. I'm a good parent so he must be a good kid." People need to wake up sometimes and look around at just what the hell is going on in their lives and stop telling themselves lies how everything is so hunky dory.

      Delete
    6. Yeah, he's no monster, he's just doing what he's been trained to do.

      Microwave dinners.
      Car giving you problems?
      Get a new one.
      Unhappy relationship?
      Get an upgrade.
      Like I said, killing your problems won't solve them.

      What we've got here is just a symptom of the real problem, and its only going to escalate until its crying in your ears day in and day out.

      Delete
    7. I know I'm also guilty, I often look for the easy way out, the quick solution, the shortcut.

      Never considering the consequences of my actions, by turning a blind eye. Someone else will deal with it, that's their job isn't it?

      That's what happened, this kid chose the wrong way of dealing with his problems, because I mean, its practically being advertised all over the place, who's got time anymore?

      Delete
    8. I've seen a few pics of him online now, and you can see some minor developmental anomalies when you look at his face. He probably had more than one issue, including the autism/Asperger's his brother claims. His eyeballs don't appear perfectly aligned (or something similar) in the one pic I've seen where you can see reflection on both eyes. Just like James Holmes. Also an indication of minor neurological developmental issues.

      Delete
    9. I'm black.

      So what's your diagnosis?
      Will I be heading out to rape a few delicious chickens in the week to come?

      Get real.

      Delete
    10. Ellicit, could you write more about eyes or post a link because I can't find it anywhere. There are slight differences between my eyes too, so I would like to know more.

      Delete
    11. I'm a bit pressed for time right now, Mee. I'll try to find something more concrete later, and post it in the forum with some pics to show you what I mean.

      If you look at his pics you can see his earlobes are abnormal, the length of his nose or distance between upper lip and nose, narrow skull.

      With the eye thing I don't understand the physiology well enough to accurately describe it. I read about it somewhere once regarding James Holmes, and can see the same mismatch in the spot where light refracts on this guy's eyes in the one pic that has eye reflections. That's showing that his eyeballs are not the same shape/alignment. There's also something slightly cockeyed with James Holmes' eyes as well as this kid. These are minor neurological developmental anomalies. If there are those that we can seen like that, there will be others affecting his brain.

      Delete
    12. I dont know if this has been brought up yet but I thought it was VERY CREEPY.......

      This morning on the radio on the way home from the methadone clinic a news guy on my local morning radio show brought this up......

      The Connecticut Killer was 20 years old AND STILL SHARED A BED WITH HIS MOTHER.......

      Maybe he was brought up in a fucked up household like that and it affected his mental health to a great degree...... IO also heard his brother hadnt talked to him in years because of his "mental problems".....

      Delete
    13. INTERESTING!!!! I just found this and it says he had autism or aspergers and at least ONE PERSONALITY DISORDER.

      What was also weird and convinced me he may be a sociopath/psychopath is his high pain tolerance, they said he could fall down and not even feel it or be hurt, here is what the article said, it isint the whole article though.

      ""This was a deeply disturbed kid," a family insider said. "He certainly had major issues. He was subject to outbursts from what I recall."

      A further family friend said he had acted as though he was immune to pain.

      "A few years ago when he was on the baseball team, everyone had to be careful that he didn't fall because he could get hurt and not feel it," said the friend. "Adam had a lot of mental problems."

      Lanza's brother Ryan reportedly told police that his sibling had autism or Asperger's syndrome, and a personality disorder."



      Here is the link where I found this article:

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/9747682/Connecticut-school-shooting-troubled-life-of-Adam-Lanza-a-fiercely-intelligent-killer.html

      Delete
    14. I forgot to bring it up but in the link I put it brings up APD and sociopathy, its a good article, I recommend reading it.

      Delete
  7. I am from the good old days when people were embarrassed to have disorders.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha now it is more like "mom and dad said i could be anything, so i chose mentally defective!"

      Delete
  8. And the flipside of the coin are the self diagnosers who need a diagnosis to give them a sense of ... antisocial belonging?

    Ha, I really like this part. I believe that people think that they are a part of society and that they belong there. In time some of them begin to notice that they aren't like the other sheep. Some get depressed (if they're capable of that). Which can lead to substance abuse, becoming asocial or suicide/self harm. Others try to be like majority and fit in at any cost. Other wanderers start to question the society and themselves and sometimes end up digging up a label (or accidentally bumping into one). Why do they even bother with it? I'd say because one can live without thinking who s/he is, but in time all of us want to belong somewhere. In addition, I doubt that the first thing these self-diagnosers do is searching for a fitting personality disorder. Also, some people might even be correct about themselves. Even a psychopathic criminal can realise that he act like that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i belong no were and i'm at home everywere

      Delete
    2. And yet you are in a sociopath world ;-)

      Delete
    3. I think self-diagnosis can come from a sense of needing to know that it's "not just you". Maybe not necessarily a need to belong, but of a sense that they're not uniquely isolated.

      Diagnosis also doesn't have much value if you're not looking to make changes to what your diagnosis is. I'm BPD but if I didn't spend a good deal of time trying to be more functional than it really wouldn't matter because I wouldn't need that frame of reference to direct my focus.

      Delete
    4. That's close to belonging, imo. Interesting, what did you went through? Under what circumstances were you diagnosed?

      It must be hard to drastically change oneself. I'm going through some changes, but I wouldn't say that I'm in a hurry and am not sure where it will lead. In time we shall see.

      Delete
    5. What haven't I gone through would be easier. I'm diagnosed Borderline along with a multitude of co-morbid things. It is hard, and it takes a lot of time. Worth it though.

      Delete
    6. I see... and why were you diagnosed?

      Changing on my own can make me worse, besides I don't complain.

      Delete
    7. Mostly I was suicidal, majorly depressed, and needed something to help me sleep. I was sick of it and decided it was finally time to try something new, a.k.a. medication.

      Delete
    8. Heh. I don't do drugs Rich, though I can't say I haven't been tempted occasionally.

      Delete
  9. is schizoid on the autism spectrum?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. To my knowledge, autism is a mental condition where the mind is specialized in a certain area, but often lacking in other areas.

      It may influence the personality in some ways, but I don't believe it has any significant effects.

      The whole personality classification thing seems a bit of a wild-goose chase to me, as some of the Cluster A [Schizoid] traits seem similar to Cluster C traits.

      Delete
    2. My Therapist believes most personality disorders fall on a dissociative spectrum.

      Delete
    3. You and I are in 100% agreement, Haven :D

      Delete
    4. When you start to look at PDs with the idea of dissociation in mind it really is easy to see where they diverge and how each has adapted the way they do.

      Delete
    5. Autism is a developmental problem. Schizoid is a personality disorder. There are similarities and overlap in symptoms between many axis one and axis two disorders. Because these symptoms can have very different causes in each disorder, the similarities are somewhat superficial.

      And yeah, I can see dissociation as a primary component of some things.

      Delete
    6. "My therapist believes most personality disorders fall on a dissociative spectrum."

      I don't agree. Dissociative behavior is a quicker heal than PD. He's just trying to make you feel good, blame others.

      Delete
    7. She*. And it's not a quick heal at all. It's also not the only issue, just a connecting one.

      Delete
    8. Set up a little pity party and invite the suckers.

      Get the cash rollin'.

      Delete
    9. To help/heal dissociative behavior have a lot of alone time, meditating and show your enemies to the door: That includes family members. Have only loving supporting people in your life.

      Delete
    10. To me, from all my studies as to what is wrong with me, it comes down to disassociation.

      Delete
  10. can you still fake autism if they can see it in a brainscan?
    problebe not in cort

    ReplyDelete
  11. Denial is much easier than taking responsibility for yourself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, laziness is the greatest sin of all.

      Delete
  12. Thank you for taking the time, Mee. I appreciate your thoughts on this kid. I read from a sociologist who researched these school shootings and she says it appears to bel about steady rejection of brainy, physically awkward kids in the sports-ties-to-cools-as-opposed-to-academic-performance-system in the USA, and these kids trying to get attention, and that in almost all cases there were some early statements relating to murder, or guns, or cops. We don't know what went on exactly in this kid's case but home-schooling is certainly not where one gets attention from his peers.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hi, Haven.

    I am curious about one aspect of BPD. The self-cutting sounds masochistic at first but I am not so sure because the motivation for ctting is not exactly for pleasure, right? Is it at all masochistic or there is a totally different explanation for it? The reason I ask is I wonder about someone else I know and think of her as BPD who has no cutting of herself but she keeps taking sick street animals (cats/dogs) to doctors for some extreme surgical intervention and she picks on her scalp. Do you see any conflict in that picture? I perceive her more sadistic than masochistic.

    I may not be making much sense with this question, just ignore if so.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With cutting it's not about receiving pleasure so much as it is finding relief. Which I suppose could be viewed as a sense of pleasure, just not in a sexual way.

      Skin picking, hair pulling, and things like that are a form of self-harm that are usually meant to soothe, though in a maladaptive way. Often they're subconsious and we don't even realize we're doing it all the time, or to the contrary, do it compulsively to gain a sense of control in a tense situation.

      I'm not sure where the sadism comes in: extreme surgical intervention for sick animals sounds altruistic not sadistic.

      Self-harm has many reasons. They can be punitive/punishment type reasons. They can be from a sense of needing to stay connected, fight off the numb, and remember you are actually living. I've written about it quite a lot. Hm... here:

      Skin Picking and Addiction


      *It's also good to keep in mind that not all self-injurers are Borderline and not all Borderlines self-injure.

      Delete
    2. Thank you, Haven. I'll read the link.

      Delete
  14. Who can relate to this situation. A socio friend and I were talking today and this less fortunate man begged him $10.00. He gave it to the man then he said to me: "I don't know why I give to them when they ask me for help." I asked him how he felt if he doesn't give money or whatever to them. He said that he feels a kind of burden and pressure that lingers for a while. Can you relate?

    As an empath I might experience guilt when I could help somebody but I don't and that in itself depends. But pressure and burden I doubt that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. he/she? was trying to impress you

      Delete
    2. the hustlers mantra there's always an angle

      Delete
    3. I feel a burden and pressure too. Not guilt, because this person was not brought to this world by my choice, and is not my responsibility exactly. I don't think this has anything to do with sociopathy, I am a hugely empathic person.

      Delete
    4. Anon 9:34Pm

      Maybe he was trying to impress me as giving is something I normally do. He gives too but not as often. Now when you ask how giving or kindness makes him feel he cannot answer. It's as if he cannot put a feeling to the action of kindness and giving.

      Delete
  15. A child knows the chessboard of life. He tries to tell people what to do with the pieces. The men are lying on their sides, with the horses( the cutest pieces) on top of them. The Queen is down for the count. The King rules, as always. The pawns are too small. Even though, they have the greatest number, it doesn't matter because they are too scrawny to go up against anyone who really matters. Once in a while, they get the King but that is damn lucky and rare.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, sofa.

      Your chessboard is your life and you are king of the chessboard. You may see the king but fuck him. You must be the last person standing. If that means everyone else is dead, that is life on the chessboard.

      Why does life seem like a battle? If you feel you are at risk, you must be armed.

      WHat exactly is paranoid about this?

      Sofa, do you think children are inherently paranoid? Because when you are in the war zone of your family you realize you are soon to be a casualty if you don't fight. You may cry you have to, you may be pissed you see peers not having to fight. But at some point the head of the household needs to be killed. By you.

      Imagine a child who had killed the powerful ones in their mind. That can set the habit of resisting people in the position of power. They become dispensable like everyone else.

      I like not having to answer to anybody. I like to be free from chessboards. When does the adult get off the chessboard? What kind of people respect the person who is master of his surroundings? This is being your own top dog. What can be more satisfying than possessing power of your life?

      Delete
    2. It's lonely at the top, no?

      Delete
    3. Anyone mind explaining this?

      Delete
    4. What is this, Days of our Lives shit?

      Come on.

      Delete
  16. I love you, Literary Anon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Umm, sorry Sofa, but that was not me.
      Been very busy lately and only just managing to catch up. I am very impressed with your writing lately, actually.

      As for the chessboard:
      Yeah, don't entirely agree with you there, anon. Sure, it's all well and good to go on about how the child needs to be strong and defeat all authority, but in reality, I don't believe you for a second that you did so. That you answer to nobody.

      You're just trying to convince us all what a tough, free spirit you are. There is always some authority that you must obey. If you answer to nobody, then essentially you would be doing anything and everything you want. Are you really trying to tell me that that's your life?

      Children who grow up with domineering and/or abusive parents, where life feels like one long battle, usually get knocked down pretty quickly whenever they try to show force. Most just shut down in order to survive.

      Annihilating everyone in your quest to kill the King does not mean you will win. Sure, I agree that it is necessary to arm yourself, to be prepared to fight back, but yeah, I think you are just as paranoid as me and have probably burned as many bridges in order to defeat every threat. You keep going like this, you will end up alone, jumping at shadows you see lurking in every corner.

      It's not about being the last one standing. I think it's more beneficial to fight smart. Figure out your own weaknesses and address them. Learn to see your enemy's weaknesses and exploit them. Form alliances. Lie, manipulate and do whatever necessary till you build up strength. All war is deception.

      Then you don't have to kill the King. You will learn to see the King as just a man. The fear will be diminished (or gone) and he will lose his power over you. You can then let him know that you will not take any more shit, will fight if necessary, but strive for peace. Then take it from there.

      Even abused children might benefit from having a relationship with their parents, as long as it is strictly on the child's terms of course.
      Recognise authority and use it to your advantage. Life is one big chessboard, play it smart.

      Delete
    2. *damn it, meant to say, life isn't one big chessboard.

      Delete
    3. Thank you, Literary Anon <3

      Delete
    4. It is a fantasy, sure. No I don't have any power whatsoever over "the KING" from childhood. The power was absolute.

      To me, in my head, i am on a chessboard. But I am in one place. I have my position and I move very slowly, unfortunately laterally. It is very boring and I don't do much more than survive.

      Right now I feel like I cannot move so I go between fantasizing about killing the source and treating myself like i am a pathetic symptom.

      You have good advice but..

      "You're just trying to convince us all what a tough, free spirit you are."

      I am? -I don't like it when someone tells me i am trying to convince anyone how anything i am. Please do not assume you have access into me. You don't have to analyse every bit. -You don't know what you are talking about here.

      I am trying to be strong, I am not a free spirit, I am suffocating, so don't tell me this.



      Delete
    5. How are you suffocating, Anon? Talk to me, as I will come back and check for your responses!

      Delete
    6. I have written and deleted. I am whining and do not want people to tell me that.

      Delete
    7. I don't call it whining. I call it telling it like it is :D

      Delete
    8. It is not whining when you speak the truth, anon. Beauty is truth, truth beauty.

      In the original post, I saw nothing but bravado. A person claiming to be so very strong and free. A warrior King standing on top of a mountain composed of the bodies of his enemies. Singing his own praises into the wind. It annoyed me immensely.

      Now I am starting to understand you better, I would like to hear more of your story. Who knows, we might be able to help one another in some way.

      I grew up with a tyrant "King" as well, whose power I thought to be absolute. So I know all too well that suffocating feeling.

      Who gives a fuck about any useless insults people here might throw in order to make themselves feel superior? You are giving them power over you by giving in to the fear of speaking your mind lest you be ridiculed.

      L.A.

      Delete
    9. Theme for Anon 9:48 with Love from Themes

      Delete
  17. There was the high wire and the low wires. There was the open door, which opened to a flight of stone stairs that went to the cellar. The wires were electrical. You never touched them.The door was never entered because the stair case did not have lights. You would hear laughing coming from the cellar. It was a laughter that made you feel like you do a man looks at your breasts too long and you want to run. You want to run to a place where he would magically disappear because his ugliness turned into dynamite and made him explode. Then, you would be fairy princess of the land and the wires could be touched and the doors could be opened because there would be light.




    ReplyDelete
  18. Thank you, Ellicit <3

    It would be nice if bogeymen announced themselves by saying, "I am the Bogeyman. How you be?" Then, maybe, you could relax enough to put the right shapes into the right holes. Square would go with square and round would go with round. You wouldn't even have to match colors. Then, you could swagger. You were smoking hot and you knew it. They knew it, too, and asked for an encore. You complied(happily, but with the proper amount of humility)

    You had another go at it. When, you came up to match the pieces with the holes, you closed your eyes. Then, you stood on your head. Then, you rode a bike and bent down, every so effortlessly, and did it. You paid so much attention to the applause that you fell off your bike. You died later that day of internal injuries suffered while driving a non motorized vehicle.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Every now and then, a sliver of sunlight comes through. It makes you thaw, like ice on a hot day in a mixed drink, which you are sipping on the beach. The ice melts fast, mixing into your drink until they are indistinguishable. In that moment, you are exactly right. Sunbeams come in words of love, spoken without a thought for repayment, making it all the more magical.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Exactly. But who consider themself "socipath" they probably have narcissistic personality disorder..

    ReplyDelete
  21. One of my Barbies is disfigured.

    ReplyDelete

Comments on posts over 14 days are SPAM filtered and may not show up right away or at all.

Join Amazon Prime - Watch Over 40,000 Movies

.

Comments are unmoderated. Blog owner is not responsible for third party content. By leaving comments on the blog, commenters give license to the blog owner to reprint attributed comments in any form.