Existential crisis?

From a reader:

I've very recently finished reading your book I wanted to say that it was quite brave of you to write this book, as after reading I immediately searched for others like it but one simple search of the word "Sociopathy" in Amazon Books brings up a dominating majority of witch-hunt esqe guides to "spotting sociopaths" and how to avoid the 'morally insane' which shows that despite the possible 4% of.the human race being this way people are still very unaware and, in a lot of cases, ignorant to what Sociopathy is and so are fearful, like you discuss in your book. What would happen if this was well known information? Would the other 96% want sociopaths imprisoned or removed, see them as an enemy? A predator with the sole purpose to prey on the morally susceptible? 

I have been thinking in, somewhat an existential crisis, about who I really am, and through similar interests with a friend over psychological thrillers and 'psychopathic' characters she introduced to me the concept of a sociopath, and I'm not going to go into detail of all the times I have experienced the tell tale traits or coincidently mention events that line up with things you have experienced yourself to make me seem like a sociopath, because I know people in my everyday life that glorify the term "Sociopath", thinking of it as an interesting character quirk like being a hipster or alternative art enthusiast, when in fact it is, well, a 'disorder' of the soul. But the events and traits you describe are more than familiar, (some of which is down to how well it was written and how open you have been on terms of intimate thoughts and ideas of your own, being a diagnosed sociopath) and I'm 18 in the later important stages of education where my apathy and diversion for social norms and impulsivity (to name a few) are affecting my everyday life in obvious and negative ways. I have done the surveys (such as the Levenson self report psychopathy scale) and seen the trait lists, which do point to me being a sociopath, but I wondered if there is anyway of getting an anonymous professional diagnosis to be sure, because I doubt my local GP will have the understanding to both competently diagnose me and to keep it as a secret, Ideally it would be through the Internet, or even if you know of a test I can do that has a reliable conclusion to whether I am a sociopath?

Also I hope you continue your work on blog because you are one of, if not the main active author and sort of activist towards proper understanding of Sociopathy for everyone, along with helping sociopaths understand who they are, it really is important work and I for one am grateful.

M.E.: Here's an interesting thing my therapist shared with me recently. I'm not sure if I believe him because he is more of a fringe type of guy (in my mind at least). He said that personality disorders are all sort of the same basic thing, but that there are like several dozen different traits that often appear in the same constellation with other traits, and that's where the personality disorder diagnoses came from but that there just different manifestations of the same sort of basic personality issue. (SIDE NOTE -- DOES ANYONE KNOW IF THIS IS ACTUALLY TRUE?) So I'm starting to think more that way. Of course the diagnoses are useful, I think, because even though I might have the same fundamental personality issues (lack of or flexible sense of self, etc.) as a narcissist, we see the world in really different ways. But I am less hung up on whether I'm a sociopath or not and more interested in figuring out what degree of freedom I have in choosing who I want to be rather than relying on my genetic or environmental programming. Does that make you less inclined to seek confirmation? Because, actually honestly, I bet a lot of what you're diagnosed with will depend on the personal biases of your doctor, so I'm not sure if there's any certainty out there no matter what?

Reader:

Firstly thank you for replying, and yes that does make sense there will always be a large amount of uncertainty even with diagnosis as, especially with personality disorders, there isn't much understanding when it comes to the workings of the mind, and I don't really feel restricted by sociopathy, more the opposite due to the heightened self awareness and kind of viewing the world through a screen as if it were a film or game that is to be played. I think it was just more of an identity crisis in trying to find a confirmation, and I do agree that either way as long as I understand myself then that is enough. Yes I am perfectly happy with you using my email, and thanks again, without your work it would be a lot harder for a lot of people to understand themselves and for others to actually understand real sociopathy instead of the cliché TV psychopath,

I look forward to your future work,