Monday, February 1, 2016

Sociopath or no?

From a reader:

Im a newbie to your website and im obviously interested in psychopathy. (Short mark: english isn't my mother language, so i hope you'll understand what im trying to say...) Theres always a question that keeps repeating inside my brain: Am i a psychopath or what am i? Ive done a lot of research about this theme and whenever i read something about sociopathie and psychopathie i can identify me with it. But it seems like im a mix from sociopathie and psychopathy. I DO feel pain or fear. And i have feelings. But im not as impulsive as a normal sociopath. I always know what i do and if it wi have bad consequences for me. What im sure about, is that i have no guilt or conscience. I do things because i want it and if my actions are affecting anyone in a bad way its their problem. As a kid i painted always dragons, never a knight or flowers and so on. I liked the 'bad guys' more than the good normal people. I like dirty dark things. Also im a big fan of killers in movies or other cruel heartless men. I was a wonderful kid. Friendly and open-hearted. As i loved a girl i was able to focus only on her, seeing no other person around. There were meaningless. But i still was a normal and influencing person. It was always easy for me to insult people. In school i often have played roles and  copied the personality of others and i was able to feel and act like them. But i still had strong feelings and had empathie. I will never forget the day we were at a journey in school and i read a book, all were silent and only listening to ME. But then there were things happen and changed me. In a  short version: I got depressed for a time. Began to hate the world and myself. Then i overcame it at some point. I became more selfish and confident. Slowly i lost empathie and became colder. At first i didn't recognized but when i read an article about psychopathie for the first time i saw it. I fit in it. I engaged in researching about all kinds of disorders. I felt good when i was able to find myself in the diagnosis. Time passed by. I sometimes felt intense emotions but they changed pretty fast. After an hour my view was completely turned around. I never knew if these feelings are real or not. They were so instabile (does this word exist?). Whenever i destroyed something important from my parents, it doesnt made me feel guilty. I only was angry because i must say something about it or excuse for what i did. I did it because i wanted to and nobody has the right to try to make me feel sorry about it. I enjoyed to do bad things, it gives me adrenaline and helped me to overcome the feeling of boredom. I did what i wanted to do. In the eye of chaos i felt best. I can't describe it. Next i found out that i can control easily every impulse that i had. I would try to explain in detail what i mean but i don't know the word in english for it. However. Then i tried to control my feelings. It was easier then i thought. Since i found out that i can control everything within my head i no more experience mood changings. If i recognize it, i bring myself to stay cold and let the feeling pass by. If my mother is in tears im tired of her and see that my opinion about her is right. Shes only a piece of dirt. I have better things to do than hear her annoying sounds. I worked on the feeling of fear and can now turn it into the feeling of joy. They have much in common. Its amusing. The only feeling i can't control is pain. But im on it. I enjoy my dark side. I thought sometimes about comitting crimes. I would do if there would be no consequences. Im sure i would enjoy it but there are these little consequences... I don't want to go to prison. When im with other people i everytime fake feelings and act normally. But lets go back to the beginning. For psychopaths its typically to don't know fear or sadness but i do. I can control it, sure, but i do feel it. Now after i told you the story of my life i would be glad if you can help me figuring out what and who i am? Can you help me bringing light in the question if im psychopathic or sociopathic or what i am? If you have questions feel free to ask. I would really appreciate it to know what i am.
Thanks for reading and good wishes, 

152 comments:

  1. What a boring pile of horse shit,you're a wannabe sociopath who somehow explains his dark side eith "painting dragons" hahahaha.....hahahaha you're a normal and depressed teenager

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  2. God damn ME, was this really worthy of publication on your blog?? Like, you've even wrote a book and everything...

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  3. Lol.Being the attention whore M.E is and seeing how this blog went right down the crapper a year ago i'm not surprised at all

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    1. Yeah it's properly scraping the barrel now..I can imagine her scouring the internet desperately searching for anything sociopathy related, heart jumping for joy everytime some edgy teen pops up in her inbox

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    2. The quality (or lack of it thereof) of the blog is beside the point. Here's a solution: don't like it, don't read it. Problem solved!

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  4. Who said i didnt find the hilarity in these angsty twits

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  5. Hoo boy, what a pile of amusing junk. Oh well, the author asks for an analysis, so let's get on it...
    I do not think the author of the e-mail is a "genuine" sociopath/psychopath, merely someone wishing he was one. Perhaps a teenager, about 17-18 years old?

    The fact that he has to contol/supress his emotions (and can clearly identify them?), along with a lack of "real-life habits", citing mostly specific examples which are supposedy "sociopathic", makes me think the author is an antisocial kid with an overactive imagination, acting out his fantasies of being a badass stone-cold motherfucker, using those specific one-time examples as "proof". And the "habits" don't seem too... what's the word... fearless, big, juicy?

    He seems to spend a lot of time theorizing what it must be like to be sociopathic, and has deceived himself he is, but he doesn't put it into practice, only deciding act out on anger against his mother and family who he hates (why?) just because it's the "sociopathic thing to do". He likes chaos and doing bad things yet there isn't anything in the e-mail remotely "chaotic" or "bad". There's more, but my time is precious, so take it from me: you are not sociopathic. You are merely living out a fantasy. It's healthy to "wind down" and act out from time to time, but real life has a priority. You either are sociopathic or not, you don't "think maybe you are". You have a preference for a "dark side", and that's okay, lots of "normal" people do too.

    While it is possible, extremely difficult but, with a lot of practice, determination, hard work, et cetera, still possible for an empathic person to become sociopathic, to find his "switch" or a "volume knob" by choice, and switch between empathy and sociopathy, logic and emotion at will (the best of both worlds, I should know), there is no "control" or "supression" involved, you simply choose which emotion to feel (and if it will affect you), or if to feel at all, you don't "bring yourself to stay cold and let the feeling pass by". The author of the e-mail, in my VERY correct opinion, is not one of those.
    Ah, the wonders of the almighty Ego™...

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  6. "The only feeling i can't control is pain. But im on it. I enjoy my dark side. I thought sometimes about comitting crimes."Oh boy i just skipped over this part,you're an angsty fucking weirdo who comes here to fuel his self esteem because of being a social outcast,you suppress these emotions because all they being you is pain and thats because you're simply not good enough to enjoy the pleasure of life

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    1. Hehehehehe, you better watch out! Pretty soon we'll have a terminator on our hands, it's only a matter of time! And then he won't rest until he finds you for your awful, bad, evil, blasphemous comment! You better watch out, he's goin' to rip yer' head off and shit down your neck! Goodness gracious, I wouldn't wanna be in your skin right now, you're nothing but a dead man walking :O

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  7. How is the author of this email any different from any other sociopath? It is so crystal clear to me. It seems to me that sociopaths have the whole snowflake thing.

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    1. Care to explain why you think he is? I don't and have explained why I don't think it is so. Go on, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt...

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  8. He seems young and struggling with knowing he is different. I am not a sociopath and can't relate. I only know I've never felt like I was becoming something I couldn't identify. Do all sociopaths feel that?

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  9. The sociopath I knew said they had a very real fear of going to hell when they were around the age that I assume the author of this email is. It seems that fear is the last thing that remains before one is completely consumed.

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  10. "Nerds" feel "different" than the "rest", too. So do "artists", autists, BPD's, et cetera. Antisocial does not neccessarily mean sociopathic/psychopathic. A highly intelligent empath will still "feel different than the rest", and maybe try to conform to the "masses" to get the acceptance and "love" he so desperately seeks. It is my opinion that everyone likes to feel "special". Some individuals even "crave" it, especially narcissists. I have no doubt he is "different". Just not "sociopathic", even though he feels that way, because, in his opinion, it would "solve" all his "problems" (aka the silver bullet). Well, he has a very active and advanced imagination, I would "label" him as "introverted logical artist" of sorts.

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    1. "Too" "many" "quotation" "marks"

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    2. Great scott! You sure do seem to know your quotation marks. 5/5 :-)

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  11. I think introverted logical artist is actually a pretty good description of a sociopath. I guess I am more interested in the internal personal struggle that everyone goes thru to some Extent-not necessarily how they measure themselves to the masses. Sociopaths seem to have very defining internal dialogues. But again I'm not a sociopath. These are just observations.

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    1. Fair enough. Maybe he's "awakening" or something, the fact is until we see and judge him in real life, with our own eyes, it's still just endless speculation. I do think what separates him from the "real deal" is the fact that he creates this persona of himself by using his imagination, he puts a great importance on the "sociopath" label (where a sociopath wouldn't care at all if he is or isn't), he seeks our affirmation that he is indeed sociopathic, for him it's the main source of happiness (real or not). I do personally know a few "introverted logical artists", and they're anything but sociopaths; they may act cold or put on this "emotionless" mask to assert themselves out of anger, but it all comes down to their feeling inadequate, unrespected, unsatisfied, unhappy - their mask isn't fooling anyone (certainly not me). Deep down, they're good people, they'll tend to selflessly help you, they can't help it, and they hate themselves for it.

      It is still possible (unlikely, though) for him to be sociopathic (as is my case), yet keep his "emotional database". It just takes a lot of work, dedication, practice, some time... And most importantly, being completely honest with yourself. The end result (again, in my case) is a combination of both sociopathic and empathic traits - a choice: to feel, not to feel, what to feel, will it affect you, et cetera. In other words, to find a "morality switch" (for me, a "volume control", or more precisely, an "equalizer" of sorts); I don't feel shame, guilt, remorse (I enjoy to cheat, lie, manipulate, yet I also like to help someone in need from time to time without really expecting anything in return), but I can should I choose to. Since I wasn't "born" a sociopath, I merely "transformed" myself into one, I can't tell you how a "real" sociopath would experience growing up. But, I have a pretty good idea what would it be like. And this author doesn't seem to fit the bill.

      So, dear anonymous sir, let us both agree to disagree then, otherwise we could go on and on and on and on forever and ever until the end draws near. I have enjoyed our little discussion, and hope you did too. I think we can both conclude that I have my opinion, and you have yours. I bid thee farewell, and don't let the monsters get ya... Muhahahahahaha ;-)

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    2. To answer your question anon,he isnt a sociopath because he tries to conscioussly suppress his emotions just to give himself relief from the displeasure his emotions bring him caused by the pathetic state of his life

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    3. Intriguing,would you be so kind enough to give an explanation as to how you achieved this "transformation"?

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    4. Intriguing,would you be so kind enough to give an explanation as to how you achieved this "transformation"?

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    5. Sure, for a modest one-time fee of 9.99 :-)

      I'll try my best to keep it short yet explanatory. Take it however you wish.

      It was my goal to study emotional control. I had this problem, knowing what to do, the "real truth of the world", and wanting to improve. But, you see, the problem was with those pesky emotions known as "guilt, regret, remorse, panic, fear...". I'd know what to do, the true intentions of people, but when under pressure, I would begin to panic, worry about what "others may think", fear being found out... despite my best conscious effort to supress/control it. There's more, but I think you get the picture. Anyway, I didn't really know what "empath, sociopath, whateverpath" means, I just knew that I needed to do something about it, as I couldn't bear to live like this and let life pass me by.
      And, lo and behold, I stumbled across something called "dark triad", and details about it (best source: illimitablemen.com). I found out about psychopathy, and that while you can't become psychopathic/sociopathic if you weren't "born with it", it wasn't all flowers and rainbows, and someone can still pick the best "socio-traits" to train themselves, and while they will be able to be "emotionally independent", all the emotions (shame, guilt, whatever) will still be there, altough diminished. Guess it's better than nothing? So I went ahead, not really expecting to be able to "choose" what to feel. The key, apparently, is not to acknowledge or pay attention to your emotions at all. For example, I would find a narcissist (an acceptable target), tell him a lie to make him
      feel insecure and inadequate, and then ridiculously feed into his attempts to "one-up" me, for as long as possible - a normal person may have suspected something was amiss, but not this guy, and then cutting him off without any explanation except "I'm sorry, but I'm really busy now, maybe another time?" until he gives up. Or I would comment on news portals just to get under people's skin while keeping a composed attitude and getting them mad then turning it around (gaslithing, if memory serves me right, which it always does).
      Anyway, I did it until the "novelty" wore off, until it became my "second nature".

      But I didn't expect I would be able to have an "emotional choice"! I fully expected to have no "absolute" control over what I feel, only that it wouldn't affect me! I already explained the gist of it in my previous comment, so there's no need to repeat the details of it.

      Now, bear in mind, it might also have something to do with my mother's side of the family - her sisters are, surpise surprise, almost all sociopathic! My father's side of the family are "fair" empaths that like to create and "leave their mark". So, I can't really tell you if I "changed my brain" or just merely "unlocked my dormant sociopathic genes". I do know, however, that before my "transformation" I have felt love, sadness, joy, and what-have-you (and can still choose to feel any emotion with just a single thought, and it won't affect me - my emotions "bypass" my conscious mind, so I am able to feel them without them affecting my state of mind or my thoughts). I also know that I would never have become "sociopathic by pressure" or "naturally", it required a conscious choice on my part, and it took a lot of effort. As I have already said, I wasn't aiming for "sociopathy", merely for emotional control and emotional independence. I don't really care if it is "real sociopathy" or not, as I have achieved more than I have initially wanted to achieve, and that's what really matters to me.

      Aaaand, that's all, folks! Thanks for reading, stay smart, be magnificent, and, most importantly... look out for yourself ;-)

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    6. Hello socioempath,
      Your story was quite interesting to read. I can relate to parts of it. I, too, made a concious decision to shut off my emotions, to become sociopathic. That was 1 1/2 years ago. My reasons were simple, I was very anxious at the time, feared public speaking and it started to show so much that people would either contempt or pity me (There was one presentation in particular where I got so nervous that I stuttered and couldn't form correct sentences. Fun). So I did some research to gain insight in the mind set of a sociopath and it was very interesting and filled my days but at the same time very frustrating as I realized the impossibility to fully understand the mind of another person, especially one so different from my own. But it was enough information to realize that one of my class mates is one. Which is great. And very intimidating at first as I was still very anxious. So time passed and I tried my best at being indifferent and imitating this class mate and it's funny how I actually got less anxious by simply ignoring the fear. I grew more confident, telling myself that I am AWESOME. But I also became mean and constantly stressed out. I avoided social relations, told a lot if lies. I felt very empty, not particularly bad but life felt very meaningless. Soo, didn't work out for me too well, and I'm afraid that I got more nihilistic than sociopathic by ignoring my emotions, but hey, still a great way to pass some time until my inevitable death. How long took your transformation? Was your only concept to suppress /ignore your feelings? How old are you?
      (No native speaker, obviously, but you get the gist)
      .___.

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    7. Hmmm... I think I see the problem.

      I have already written a comment down below (2:58 PM) which should answer some of your questions.

      I have made a similar "mistake" in the (mildly distant) past - trying to "act indifferent" which came out of the desires of the Ego. And not putting it into practice. Do note that "ignoring" is not the way I consider proper - they will stay there because you are concentrating on ignoring them (do not think of the polar bear!). What I did during my "final practice" was simply - nothing! As in, I may notice the emotion, "accept" it for what it is and what's it's purpose, not worry if it will make me "weak", et cetera. And go about my business unaffected by it. Do note the subtle difference between "ignoring" and "not acknowleding".

      Where you and I differ, in my opinion, is that I have accepted that I don't need to be sociopathic, or that it will bring me power, or whatever "egoistic" reason - I was only interested in learning and self-improvement for the sake of learning and self-improvement. I hope all of this is clear to you. My "sociopathy" came as an "unexpected gift", which may be, as I have already mentioned, due to the dormant "sociopathic genes" from my mother's side of the family.

      From what I could glean in your comment, your ego is you "achilles heel". For example, I do not need to tell or repeat to myself " I am AWESOME". That's because I know I am. I am completely sure of my abilities (maybe I tend to exaggerate them? Bah, who cares!) And I have quite a few real-life "exploits" that I've done and will do, which only affirm me that I am right/awesome. Where you would get "offended" when somebody "challenges" you or insinuates that you are "inadequate" and that would compel you to "prove" yourself, I have no such desire and it doesn't offend or affect me (yet again, because I know myself) - I may do it out of fun, to sharpen my skills, to "test my mettle", but not because of "inferiority" or "inadequacy", or to "show them who's boss". If somebody beats me at my own game, for example, I respect their skills and will learn from the experience.

      Don't worry if you'll be at a "disadvantage" if you're not "sociopathic", just focus on yourself and you self-improvements - for a lot of people, "stoicism" is a perfect "replacement" for "sociopathy". Oh, and don't be so bitter, content, lazy, living day-by-day. Get a purpose or three, meet new people, acquire some healthy habits (weightlifting is good). I guarantee you, you'll see MASSIVE improvements.
      All the best advice and suggestions in the world are worth NOTHING if you don't put it into practice. And never, ever stop - there's no rest for the wicked.

      So, are you gonna bend, or are you gonna stand? What's it gonna be, pretty boy? :-)

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    8. You both sound wonderfully, fantastically, fascinatingly bonkers. Socioempath, tbh I think you are far more empath than socio, however if you're doing what you have to do to make your life better then fair play to you.

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    9. You're right. You gotta find whatever works for you. Everyone's different. You got yours, and I got mine.

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  12. Thank you socioempath. Very interesting indeed. And don't let the bed bugs bite!

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  13. This post completely described how I felt for a while. I still act the same, but I now realize my behavior is due to my personality type. I'm an INTJ, and it's in my nature to be like this. Perhaps this person has a touch of sociopathy though.

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  14. So can the author control his impulse to control his impulses? seriously i think he might imagine he has more control than he does.

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    1. Control is an illusion, no matter how real it seems or how powerful it feels.

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    2. NM-You are right on.:) I love this quote from the movie "Days of Thunder", when Nicole Kidman says to Tom Cruise: "Control is an illusion, you infantile egomaniac. Nobody knows what's gonna happen next: not on a freeway, not in an airplane, not inside our own bodies and certainly not on a racetrack with 40 other infantile egomaniacs."

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    3. Had to google that film. Doesn't sound promising to me.

      Didn't quote anyone, just thought aloud. I rather meant to say that the rush you feel upon controling yourself or a target/person is just your dopamine pathways' way of working - not an outward source of infinite power touching you. I have to tell that to myself somewhat frequently, hence the shortcut "Control = Illusion".

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    4. Not a race car guy? It wasn't a very good movie, but I liked the quote.:) So true!!! I didn't actually think you were quoting that movie-whenever I hear control/illusion, it just makes me think of that movie, and that line.:)

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    5. I'm not into controlling others-I like to get my dopamine hits from sex.:)

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    6. ...and, other things.:)

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    7. Aeroplanes are more of my case, but in terms of films/books etc. I'm all into sci-fi, horror, horror sci-fi, psychothrillers (especially the more horror/realistical variants) and nature documentary films.

      Associatons can cause funny conversations. ;)

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    8. "I'm not into controlling others-I like to get my dopamine hits from sex.:)"

      I like get mine from controlling others during sex.

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    9. ...I think that's why "sex, drugs, and rock and roll", are so popular.:)

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    10. "...I think that's why "sex, drugs, and rock and roll", are so popular.:)"

      Sure enough. We all strive to follow nature's call.

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    11. NM-You crack me up!!! You don't need to be a "race car" guy-I just thought men across the planet all became "race car guys", once Danica Patrick hit the scene.:) I don't think we would be reading the same books or watching the same movies, but I can certainly appreciate nature.:) I'm a "peace and love" kind of girl.:) Associations can definitely make for some funny and interesting conversations.:) I bet you like to control others during sex, and I'm sure you are very good at it.:) Care to elaborate??? We definitely all strive to follow nature's call, don't we???

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    12. NM-Will you replace the picture of the other dog, with one of your dog???

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    13. PS NM-I love dogs.:) I got my hair done yesterday, and my stylist brought in his dog-SO CUTE!!! A pitbull mix.:)

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    14. NM-Sorry I lost you-I stepped away for a few minutes.:( It was fun talking to you.:)

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    15. PS NM-Love airplanes, love to travel, love the word "aeroplanes", as opposed to airplanes.:)

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  15. Socioempath-Do you believe you are a "hybrid"??? Part socio and part empath???

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    1. Yes, I believe it is so.
      Even so, I can still, in some cases, have "unwanted" emotions like everyone else (for example, when I'm under a really great deal of stress or when listening to "epic moving" music), they are rare, and greatly diminished, "floating meaninglessly". I could still "let" them "take me over", as is the case when I'm listening to music.

      I do know that in my past I fit the "empath" profile to a T, and today I can "find myself" in both sociopathy and empathy. So, I guess I am a "hybrid", then? Seems so to me, but I find that I do not really care, and that I like my new "state" so very much, as it gives me practically limitless freedom and choice. So call me what you will - I chose "socioempath" because it rolls so nicely off the tongue :-)

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  16. Socioempath-I am a music lover, too.:) Definitely a good reason, to let your emotions take over!!! I am curious about how old you were when you identified as empath, your age and length of time it took to become hybrid, and your age and how long you have been hybrid??? I agree that "socioempath" rolls nicely off the tongue.:)

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  17. If society "breed psychopaths" by forcing people with "beady eyes" to attend school & then use them as low-paid labour or inmates in workfare-programs, isn´t society to blame then if then cold, remorseless people, "anti-citizens", emerge? If somebody relentlessly tease pitbulls or bulldogs & things "goes south", do folks usually then blame the dogs..?

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    1. Unfortunately, yes. I call it "victimizing the victim", I do not think it is right, but it is common...

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    2. "(...) do folks usually then blame the dogs..?"

      Ever took a look at the less credible newspapers? That's how society works, eversince. (Not only with dogs, of course.)
      Quite funny, isn't it?

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    3. Hey NM!!! You have been missed.:)

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    4. Never been away, just stalking. ;)

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    5. You said you were "too busy" for us.:(

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    6. Nah, never too busy to stalk SW's comment section and reading M.E.'s articles.

      I just have - theoretically - no time to hang around here for long enough to write interesting stuff as of currently. (Still some exams to write at university)

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    7. NM-I'm glad you aren't too busy for us.:) What you write doesn't have to be long, to be interesting.:) Best of luck on your exams, too.:)

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    8. Glad to hear that.

      Thanks for wishing me luck, but it's of no avail. Either I finally start learning or I'll fail. No luck involved. (Tho, in the end I seem to win anyways, without exceptions - so, procastinating seems legitimate atm)

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    9. NM-You don't need luck-I can tell.:) From what I can surmise-you may be the quickest and most intelligent person, I have read on this blog.:) I bet you always win.:) I am also a procrastinator, and it is quite legitimate.:) I find that the added pressure, causes me to perform even better.:)

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  18. Awww, someone's in loooove! We have sooo much in common, let's get married, have lots of cute little babies and live happily intertwined ever after, forever and ever, eternally existing as two SoulMates, until the sands of time crumble under the eternal crossroads of existence we all call Life :-)

    Hehehehehehe 3:)

    Well, to be honest, I have always had a few sociopathic "tendencies" (as does everyone?). I did have a preference for "dark" or whatever, as it "looked cooler", and it was a nice "escape" - I guess it was my coping mechanism?
    Anyway; I did help people (always finding the best in them), had problems saying no, couldn't stop myself when somebody played the "sympathy" card even if I knew better. I think you already know the "deal", so I won't go into great detail here.

    Currently, my solar cycles number in twenty three. As for how long it took me to "transform", well, I can give you no definite answer there - it was in phases/cycles, so maybe a year, year and a half, two years? However, the definite "finale moment" was about two months ago, and it was completed maybe a month or so ago. So, I am a "hybrid" for... a month or so? It is "stable" so far, and I don't mind it, really. So far, I have had no problems with it. Nobody knows what the future shall gift me with, but so far, the past affecting the present indicates a incadescently bright future.
    And the funny thing is, I found out I "was" an empath during the "finale phase".

    Now, I am "naturally" extroverted, but don't mind introversion at all. I can read a book for a few hours, browse interesting articles, then without any problems go out alone or with friends and meet new people and charm their socks off. Nothing really bothers me. Nothing at all. I have no qualms against using (and ruining) other people to get what I need (yes, even if they are empaths, get over it). Or helping them just because it will get me ahead. And on the flip side, I don't also mind just helping someone because of helping, without expecting the person to remember or appreciate it, because The Stars Are Aligned Perfectly or somebody farted at the right time.
    As I already stated: complete choice and freedom!
    Oh, and "strong emotions" are waaaaaaaaaaaay overrated. Yes, they are fun, that is for certain. But not that much useful or needed for a "happy" life, but they sure make for good "indicators" and make my "blending" a whole lot easier than it really ought to be (almost no mental effort required). You won't see me complaining though.

    I have the powaaaaaah! At last, it is mine! I shall be the ruler of all! Muhahhaahhahahaha!

    Hehehehehehe, juuuust kidding...
    ;-)
    Anyway, I can only say this to you:
    Practice is King.
    (Complete) Self-honesty is Queen.
    Patience is the Key.
    Self-improvement is the Way.
    Emotions are overrated, but still very useful.
    Life's a bitch.
    If you don't want to starve, you better get your share.
    If you don't like blood, you better close the door then.

    That's all, then. I have helped you as much as I reasonably could. Don't expect more. It is up to you: be "special" and wait for the "reward", or take what you deserve and rise beyond the heavens. The choice is yours. And I have made mine. Peace!

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    1. You said you were "too busy" for us.:(

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    2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wk-jT9rn-8

      :-)

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    3. Hahaha it's the last bit that did it for me.
      there is no such thing as a "hybrid sociopath",or whatever fancy name you put on it to feed these gullible twits that they'll give you acceptance,stop fucking bullshitting

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    4. Tsk, tsk, tsk...

      I know what I am, and what I have been. And I have answered questions as truthfully as I could.
      Oh well, whatever floats your boat, lustprinzip. I can't force you to believe anything. You believe what you will.

      P. S.
      The "last bit" was a response for the anomymous's comment. It seemed... "fitting"?

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  19. I guess psychopaths are needed by media & politicians, so the holier-than-thou folks can remain clean & fresh. The public probably dont want the worst 20% prisoners to be "defused" in their youth, they want capital punishment and max-prisons. These serve as "internal foes". If they got "sweet & cosy", what really would motivate gun & alarm sales?

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    1. A simple-minded guess. Reconsider.

      Unless you live inside a blockbuster Hollywood film plot.

      Delete
    2. NM-I dig you.:)

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  20. OP sounds like a borderline narcissist with histrionic tendencies - or: your average frustrated teenager.

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    1. NM-What does "OP" stand for? I think you have used that before...

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    2. OP = Original Poster / Original Post

      Chat Slang. I like to use abbreviations sporadically.

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    3. NM-I agree with you about OP. Thanks for the clarification-this is the only blog I have bothered to visit.:)

      Delete
  21. I'm ever so curious; I probed my new roommate for information regarding his mental health, and apparently he refers to himself as a sociopath but on paper he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at a very young age, but he functions very well as an adult. We have fantastic conversations, he's so remarkably intelligent and witty. His older brother though is apparently a legitimately diagnosed sociopath; last Sunday he rolled up in a sleek black muscle car, stepped out and met his own cold steely blue gaze with my own. I don't doubt it; his very presense oozes strength of character, and the way he looks at me in the eyes so intensely as if he could peer deep into the windows of my very soul. "I don't walk under God, I walk alongside God as his equal", he said as we speeded down the highway to church.

    ESTP Sociopath

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    1. ESTP-From what I have gathered from this blog, sociopathy is an autism spectrum disorder. It sounds like both your roommate and his brother are sociopaths, then. Or, do you not believe that your roommate is one? What type of church did you go to-ie. denomination??? Also, did your roommate's brother say-"I don't walk under God, I walk alongside God as his equal", while you were at the service???

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    2. PS ESTP-Did you smoke out, before you went to church???

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    3. It's a bit far out to say sociopathy could be included in the autism spectrum; sociopathy, I think, is much too distinct from any form of autism to be placed under the autism spectrum umbrella.

      My roommate isn't exactly sure if he's actually a sociopath, but he does recognize several of his own personality traits could be defined as sociopathic. I tell him it doesn't matter, you are what you are, embrace it and live out the kind of life that is fulfilling to his true self. I honestly could care less if he is truly a "real" sociopath, but I do see value in studying the facets of him that reflect sociopathy and seeing how that might give me more insight about myself as a sociopath. His brother seems to be the kind of individual I would very much like to get to know better though. He's a fascinating specimen of a man. A very dark and violent past, or so my roommate says. He spent 17 years of his life with the Hells Angels motorcycle gang, an organized crime syndicate according to the US Department of Justice, dealing drugs and so on.

      ESTP Sociopath

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    4. ESTP-I wouldn't have associated sociopathy with autism either, however M.E. and many others have referenced it as such, while citing professional information in that regard. I don't know if it is true or not.

      Would anyone like to expand for ESTP and I, on the information regarding sociopathy being on the autism scale???

      Delete
    5. ESTP-Do you think your roommate is a sociopath, or no? Also, I could tell, that you very much like his brother.:) It's funny that you mention the Hell's Angels motorcycle gang.:) I believe they are an organized crime syndicate. Like everything, though-not all things are all bad. When I was a kid, a group of Hell's Angels helped my family get our vehicle out of the sand, when we got stuck at the beach.:) If it hadn't been for them, I think our family vehicle would have been in the ocean, and our family vacation would have been cut short.:( I definitely would never want to make them mad, though...

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    6. Ahahaha, this has to be made up...however, I enjoyed reading it and hope it gets turned into a book with dramatic plot twists, sexual intrigue, exotic locations, minor celebrities, incest, murder and cannibalism. And dinosaurs. Many stories could be improved with more dinosaurs.

      Delete
    7. "I'm ever so curious; I probed my new roommate for information regarding his mental health, and apparently he refers to himself as a sociopath but on paper he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at a very young age, but he functions very well as an adult. We have fantastic conversations, he's so remarkably intelligent and witty. His older brother though is apparently a legitimately diagnosed sociopath; last Sunday he rolled up in a sleek black muscle car, stepped out and met his own cold steely blue gaze with my own. I don't doubt it; his very presense oozes strength of character, and the way he looks at me in the eyes so intensely as if he could peer deep into the windows of my very soul. "I don't walk under God, I walk alongside God as his equal", he said as we speeded down the highway to church."

      what a pile of bollocks.The first part just seems like you're trying to make your life seem interesting on this blog which is pathetic of exponential levels.Secondly that "cold gaze "(lmao) and looking at your "empty soul" was pure dramatic bs,you think sociopaths can deduct everyone's behavior just by seeing them?you're wrong,that is drama to feed fantasy,no sociopath in their right mind would say that to another person which not only makes me doubt your storys validity but also your "sociopathy"

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    8. Holy shit! Here comes dr. Lustprinzip, giving out free diagnoses! And all that just from a single glance! What a man he is!
      How generous of you, mister L! I never expected anybody to be so talented, kind and unselfish. I can only wish I was half as decent as you...

      ESTP, your days here are numbered. Your web of lies is going to get untangled, ya poser! Lusty's on to you! He's lean, he's mean, he's a real fighting machine! You better watch out, you better not cry, 'cause heeeere's lusty, kickin' and swearin'! It's payback time, and lustpee's come to collect...

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    9. Everything I've said is true to the best of my knowledge, if you don't believe it, that is your choice.

      ESTP Sociopath

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    10. You gotta admit though, these snarky sarcastic know-it-all internet Sherlocks do make for some quality entertainment :-)

      As Lemmy says:
      "I know you're only talking,
      To keep the silence out.
      Maybe you should listen,
      And leave some room for doubt...
      You're just handing out bad reputations,
      Why don't you shut your mouth!

      Overnight sensation,
      All mouth and no soul.
      The bad boys sold your franchise,
      And stole your Rock 'n' Roll!
      ...
      Maybe you should listen,
      How hard could it be!
      Good manners don't cost nothing,
      But that ain't what you want from me!"

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDVqI1epHyQ

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    11. Thank you for the music selection, Socioempath. I'll listen to it while I get ready for an appointment this afternoon.

      ESTP Sociopath

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  22. Y'all went to church?

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    1. Why not? I like going to places like churches to establish new connections with people I might want to use as tools to further my own interests. I could care less about the Bible, nothing more than a book of fairy tales written by men who interpret God's expression of reality; those are words written be man, not God. The prayers, the baptisms, and other rituals are all completely arbitrary. If God's love is unconditional, he does not care how you choose to worship him or grovel before him. Simply having faith in him and his grand game of meticulously manipulating all that is his creation, would be sufficient enough I would think. If he, the omnipotent invisible hand pulling the puppet strings, exists anyways.

      I'm no true Christian though, as I don't truly care at all for the social construct that Christianity is, another layer of the onion that is the facade of society. I just go to church to mingle and find tools to play with.

      ESTP Sociopath

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    2. ESTP-Does your roommates brother go to church with you for the same reasons, or different ones???

      Delete
  23. Psychopaths/Sociopaths-NM and I were talking and "sex, drugs, and rock and roll" came up.:) If we all found ourselves on an exotic beach, under palapas, spearing fish and catching shellfish to cook on our open fire, while drinking and smoking weed (grown and supplied by ESTP), while playing and listening to music, and having sex-would you think that was fun or boring? The money for the drinks/instruments/music playing devices, would come from ESTP's weed sales, combined with selling bracelets we wove and sold to tourists.:) Thoughts???

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  24. People want their psychopaths. I believe they do. These super antihero-beings is seen as a "hidden promise" to the little man: maybe he is not a success in life, maybe his car is rusty, maybe he´s not good looking: but perhaps he IS ONE? If all else has "gone south", maybe he still can join THAT CLUB?

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  25. The world needs nietzchesque supermen-not a bunch of Eddie Haskells.

    ReplyDelete
  26. " I worked on the feeling of fear -and turned into joy."

    Interesting , I feel that way about love and hate. They have more in common than I thought. Probably the emotional ambivalence of borderline.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, as I see it, if you've invested in something (parent-child, girlfriend-boyfriend, mechanic-car...), it's should only be natural to "love" the "progress" and "hate" the "setbacks"; so, a parent may get angry or hate a child because it didn't live up to whatever expectations that parent had for the child (it's an emotional, financial... investment), or the child may hate/get angry at the parent because of "unfair limitations" (curfews and what-have-you) because it "dissapointed" him, as the child didn't expect nor want the "negative outcome".

      So, could "hate" be simply described as an "investment" that "cost too much" or "didn't return enough"? And could "indifference" be simply "too much hate", as in, the "deficit" dipped too much below someone's "tolerance threshold", so the person just gives up?

      Anyway, enjoy the song. I think it amazingly depicts "the thin line between love and hate". It's a really nice piece of music, too :-)
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7RBEQ8tgNFo

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    2. There is a fine line between love and hate. They are the two stongest emotions. I think of them not on a line spectrum, but on a pie chart next to each other. You can love someone more than life itself, but if something happens, the line separating love and hate on the pie chart can disappear. Then, the two strongest emotions can become co-mingled, and one can be taken over by the other...

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    3. Socioempath-Per my post above-I do believe hate can be described as an investment that cost too much or didn't return enough. Either of those things can make the line disappear. Indifference happens when no emotion is involved. It can be because there never was any emotion, a person does not want to invest their emotions, or they simply have exhausted their emotions. Too much love, hate, etc., can result in indifference. PS-thank you for the music-it is always much appreciated.:)

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    4. Interesting...
      However, I think that, for a "normal" person, it is practically impossible to not invest their emotions, no matter how much that person tries to supress it, but it can happen (a lot of times in "normal" women) if they "rationalize away" their emotions so they can get away with doing "cruel" things without (noticable?) guilt or remorse - if a person believes their own lies, "redirects" their emotions.

      Thank you for the discussion, and I'm glad that you liked the song.

      Oh, here's a little something for you. I think you're gonna like it ;-)
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqDjunLynCI

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    5. Thanks , I'll look into the songs. And I resonated with what you said.

      Delete
  27. Not saying ur one. Referring it in myself.

    ReplyDelete
  28. NM-This quote is for you: "Diamonds are only lumps of coal that succeeded under pressure."

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  29. Psychopaths/Sociopaths-What are your thoughts, on M.E.'s tweet: "I wish people would stop thinking of pedophilia and homosexuality as a choice. It's hard-wired. No Rainbow Coalition for pedos, though." Do you think pedophilia is ok???

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    1. Pedophilia is a mental illness that is "hard-wired" into people, they cannot help feeling the way they feel no more than a homosexual can feel sexual attraction to others of the same sex. The difference is that one is morally accepted in society more or less, while the other continues to be heavily stigmatized. Some are sympathetic to pedophiles, as some recognize what they are and strive to over come their attraction and seek help. One can be a pedophile, but that doesn't mean you will act upon your urges. I see no reason for others to shame them, especially if they see that a pedophile doesn't want to become a victim of their own nature.

      How this relates to sociopathy? A sociopath, despite the personality traits that give them the proclivities for antisocial behavior, doesn't have to give into it. We can strive to be higher functioning individuals, just like how pedophiles can strive to overcome their own nature.

      I sometimes wonder though, is it society that is ill and not me? Are my personality traits so repulsive and delusional, or is society's perception of sociopathy distorted? Issues are only so if we choose to perceive them as such.

      ESTP Sociopath

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    2. I'm reminded by this of a quote M.E. Thomas tweeted once,

      "What is better - to be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?" ~ Paarthurnax

      ESTP Sociopath

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    3. ESTP-Thank you, for your response.:) I believe homosexuality is more morally accepted, because it is presumably between consenting adults. I have no issue with pedophiles, that do not act on their impulses. I applaud sociopaths who strive to not give into their antisocial proclivities. Sociopaths can be extremely high functioning individuals. I do not think the difference between sociopaths and non-sociopaths is so much "bad and good", "ill and well", "repulsive and non-repulsive", "delusional and non-delusional", but rather, that it needs to be "re-framed". I think the main difference between sociopaths and non-sociopaths is this: sociopaths tend to exploit the "unfairness" in the world and in life, and non-sociopaths tend to want to make things more "fair" in an "unfair world" and "unfair life". This is of course, a generality, so please stay with me. What I mean by that is-a sociopath might decide they would take advantage of an animal or child, because they could. A non-sociopath would want laws to protect the animal or child, because they might not be able to protect themselves from an adult human, that wanted to take advantage of them. I think that is the main difference. It is the difference between being pro-exploitation and not...

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    4. ESTP-In regard to your post above-none of us are born "good". I believe that for whatever reason(s)-genetics, enviornment, etc., that non-socios either do not have or are able to better control their natural "proclivities". Again, this is a generality. I think being able to overcome an "evil nature" (for lack of a better word) through great effort, is by far "better" than not needing to overcome to as great a degree, or not needing to overcome at all...

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    5. PS ESTP-I cannot speak for all non-socios, but this is my point of view: I believe sociopaths are magnificent human beings. I understand your potential, and how you could make the world a more fair and better place. It saddens me, when you choose to exploit weakness, or only better your own life. It saddens me, because I see the lost potential, for us all...

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    6. ...that goes for non-socios, too...

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    7. PSS ESTP-Here's an anaology for you: This is another generality, but imagine the Superbowl. Non-socios see their "team", and believe all of the players are working as a team, to win the game together. Then, their quarterback purposely makes them lose the game. Later they find out their quarterback is a sociopath, and lost the Superbowl and sold his team out, for his own selfish interest. His non-socio teammates and fans are saddened, and want to know why. The quarterback had his reasons, but all anyone will see and remember is a lost Superbowl, and a lost win for so many, forwever...

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    8. ...that was supposed to be "forever".:)

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    9. ...I think that is really the main difference: an individual mentality vs. a team mentality...

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    10. PSSS-I know rules can be annoying, but they are there for a reason. Take the Tom Brady debacle. There is no need to deflate footballs. If Tom Brady and his team win because they are the best, that is to be respected. If they had to deflate a football to win, what legitimacy is there in that? Speaking for myself: non-socios can like games, think the same rules should apply to all players, and like to see a "real winner". It is not knowing it is a game, there are rules for some and not others, and what they see as an "illegitimate win" they dislike...

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    11. PSSSS-We just want to know that it is a game, what the rules are and that they apply to everyone, and let the best win. Anything less is beneath you, and us...

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    12. It comes down to people not wanting to be injured or to see others injured. This is an innate and adaptive trait and thus the norm.

      My position is that awareness of neurodiversity gives us all opportunities to live more effectively as the social creatures we are. I'm for freedom and responsibility. This does not preclude the need for rules; rather it makes the purpose of the rules clearer. Greater awareness and better modelling of the human condition means more realistic foundations for social groups and relationships.

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    13. Anon 10:19

      Yes! I assess the difference in that same way: inclination to behave fairly is the differentiating factor.

      Busy day, didn't see your post earlier :) more to write but that's probably enough for now.

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    14. Anon @11:23

      Very true re games. I travelled the world looking for the very best players to test myself against. Cheating has no appeal; conquering, on the other hand, is such a delicious thrill. I'm not saying I adhered to all the rules - I played right on the edge but always to the whistle because that's the smarter strategy.

      I remember reading Timothy Ferriss in the Four Hour Work Week. He explained how he won a martial arts tournament by exploiting a rule. He won all his matches be encouraging his opponents to go out of bounds three times. While that's great lateral thinking and there's a nice lesson in that - especially in business - it's completely empty of any value I'd associate with victory.

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    15. I recognize that: the contempt normal people hold when they've realized they've been played. They wouldn't naturally be inclined to recognize right from the start the rules that are being played with, mostly so because I think they would feel guilty for even thinking of such a game to be played by them.

      Rules are meant to be exploited, or that's how I perceive it to be. Sociopaths are just aware of the invisible wars that go on within society; normal people too play these games, although they don't necessarily know to recognize it as such. I think us sociopaths are more heavily inclined to see the dynamics of social warfare and use it to our advantage, to exploit the rules of our game and "cheat".

      ESTP Sociopath

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    16. I agree north,cheating makes such a hollow victory. I truly believe with sociopaths that matters little. I think it's all about that one second for them. All the work and inane things they do are all for that one second when they can feel they caused someone else pain thru chaos. North I remember you commenting that nothing is worse than the confusion-the not understanding. I agree.

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    17. When I read these accounts of sociopaths and their "Becoming" I feel they all are so similar in that the person or their mind seems completely hijacked. I think that's why there are so many questions they have about themselves and their own identity . It seems to get lost. Overtaken. And they appear to be just as confused as someone from the outside looking in. Possibly even more so because it seems so obvious to me. But if that was your "Self" being overtaken I'm sure it would be incredibly confusing.

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    18. ESTP Sociopath,

      As Anon 5:15 mentions, it's confusion. The rules a sociopath breaks are so implicit to our social operation, we (at least I) was not even aware of their existence.

      This is why the process of recovery is so long. In my case, I needed to find an adequate account for human sociality that includes an understanding of our implicit modes of operation as well as the sociopaths' modes.

      I think the lack of awareness of social warfare as you put it is like the herd mentality. Our feelings are shortcuts; they drive our social behaviour as part of a complex system that interacts with our beliefs. They are very efficient - especially when embraced and not thwarted. The chink in the armour is that we have no innate understanding nor built in mechanism for recognising that others might operate differently (beyond those initial primal flags that something is different with that person.)

      ESTP Sociopath I understand your saying rules are made to be broken. I've understood for some time that the decisions we make each day are really choosing the balance we walk between personal pleasure or gain and social inclusion and the benefits that entails. This is like playing to the whistle in rugby. Now recall that neurotypicals see more benefit from the warmth of - ie just belonging to - social groups than what sociopaths do. The brain efficiently seeks outcomes - that doesn't mean it can't make mistakes but these are usually based on an inadequate belief structure. And good outcomes are flavoured differently between sociopaths and neurotypicals. Anon 5:13 hits on a very important point: we think all the manoeuvring a sociopath does to be extremely inefficient and incomprehensible, whereas you clearly see the payoffs as delightful. So, in contrast to your view: rules are means for structuring social groups to particular ends and our default is to at least recognise that fact. For the most part, the neurotypicals' implicit functioning serves us very well.

      And good things are easy to get.

      I suppose the difference really is that sociopaths think themselves smarter because they deceive. I'm arguing here that's based on a faulty understanding of the neurotypical condition. Sociopaths have both natural advantages and natural disadvantages that they seem incognisant of. I'm articulating this because it's important for neurotypicals who want a better framework for understanding their experiences- something that goes beyond the game framework set up by the sociopath, and that allows more curiosity and less polemical reflection than the condemning 'no-contact' model. Perhaps it's also useful to sociopaths; in fact I hope it is. Better awareness can only help us all to develop more adaptive beliefs.

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    19. Sorry, I didn't phrase that as well as I might have. Self confidence is a wonderful thing, regarding yourself as a cloud and what not. This is something to be cultivated, rather than any sense of self in relation to others. That's always flimsy. I know you are a broad thinker, naturally imbued with self confidence and I think you can make space for what I'm saying.

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    20. I appreciate your thoughts, North. I may reply with more later this afternoon after I have some business taken care of.

      ESTP Sociopath

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    21. North I clearly remember saying to the sociopath why would you do this to me? And now I understand that a sociopath does something because he wants to and he can but I still don't understand the why and really I don't think sociopaths really understand it either. I don't think it's because normals threaten them in any way. They are aware they have the upper hand. Sociopaths understand understand drive attached to reward but do they understand drive alone? Their drive they seem almost detached from. I wonder.

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    22. I know what you mean and I did ask a question of these guys along those lines, asking them what their impulses were.

      And this is why I want to challenge the sociopath claim to being more rational. The neocortex comes into play when planning and evaluating. I want to explore the differences - if any - between these functions in the psychopath and the neurotypical. Neurotypicals do plan actions, even driven ones, just as psychopaths plan actions IAW whatever their impulses are. Emotions are an additional input to those planning and evaluating processes - emotion boosts neuroplasticity and therefore adaptability.

      Keen to hear your thoughts!

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    23. As I see it, emotions are "autopilots", guiding you towards (or away from) something - your preferences and dislikes. However, as is the case in manual vs. automatic, they are "limited, inflexible". I find that, without emotions, my reflexes, peripheral vision, perception, finding a solution to a problem... is much better than with them; emotions "narrow down, cloud" your choices. But, on the flipside, having emotions frees up the brainpower and make it easier to make a choice (if those emotions are "within expected parameters"), can keep you dedicated to something where you would give up, keep you safe when otherwise you would risk your health... I can compare them to Apple vs Android - first one is fast and easy, but limited and inflexible, while the second may be more prone to crashes, takes some effort to set up and customize, but once you get it to your liking and optimize it, it can do anything you want as fast (or faster?) as the other one, and the software can always be replaced and tweaked however you wish.

      In "normal" people, emotional always tends to "take over" the logical, and it can lead to a "brain conflict" of sorts, where they get confused, sacrifice their well-being for no reason, makes them freeze up...
      But for the person that has to learn "neurotypical" emotions from scratch, it takes effort to learn and "emulate" those emotions, with the risk of miscalculations that may or may not have catastrophic results, with the added difficulty of having to constantly guess the correct responses. Does it mean that by constantly having to "experiment" to survive (and enjoying it), psychopaths/sociopaths are more prone to impulsive and self-destructive behavior?


      So, both have their pros and cons. Evolution wouldn't select for emotions if they weren't useful in some way, and neither would it consistently select for sociopathy if it was useless. The man that can utilize both efficently (by "getting lucky" and becoming socioempathic, by becoming very adept in "stoicism"...) will effectively have the strengths of both and weaknesses of neither.

      I hope this helps you in your "quest for understanding". Good night!

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    24. I've written a reply - it keeps disappearing.

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    25. Hey Socioempath,

      Thanks for writing. I noticed your comments above and pondered them. I'm glad you've elaborated your perspective here; I imagine we can have some very interesting conversations.

      Before I respond directly, I want to say I read the Utilising the Dark Triad: Psychopathy article on Illimitable Men article around 12 months and very closely considered following the advice it contains. Illimitable Man is a convincing writer.

      I don't share his obsession with power and I'm more Epicurean than Stoic. In the end, I continued on my way developing a synthesis of methods from the likes of Christopher S Hyatt, Alan Watts, my own experiments, other mystical traditions, neuroscience, psychology, evolutionary biology and so on.

      Nevertheless, Illimitable Man did capture my attention and I'm very pleased to find someone who has tried his methods and found them successful.

      You will find I am very open minded and interested in any view that can enhance my own. I am a thief of ideas and an endless experimenter.

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    26. Briefly, my own view is that our emotions are a richness and open doors to the untapped potential of the nervous system. I embrace my feelings as impulses from neurological centres within me that have reasons for existing. At the same time, I understand they run in cycles and are fleeting, brief messengers bringing energy that I can direct as I choose. Of course, learning to direct their energy is what takes practice - for me it was like being handed the keys to a Corvette before learning how to drive.

      My epistemology posits as a starting point that knowledge is biological: neural pathways and muscle memory. So I am sharing my personal story that we have a clear basis for fruitful discussion.

      Like you, I understand evolution has selected for neurotypical trait constellations as well as psychopathic trait clusters. By the fact of their existence they are equally valid, despite unequal frequencies of distribution in the population.

      And like you, I understand we can utilise the best of both worlds. As you say, there are pros and cons to each of these modes of operation: creating a genuinely evidence-based model of human sociality inclusive of neurodiversity improves awareness and awareness allows better modelling of sociality and better modelling helps us select and design strategies to achieve better outcomes. We then have a better grasp on the levers influencing the quality of our experience of life as humans.

      I like your analogy of Apple vs Android and in fact might adopt it of my own approach (idea thief, as I mentioned), even though it is opposite in some respects. I will say I am glad to read you and discover the success of yet another model by which we as individuals can shape our own experience of the universe.

      I hope to converse with you further.

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    27. Its funny north, the sociopath challanged me to look at the logic of things. They used the word logic. But all of their logical points were based in lies. It would have all been perfectly logical-if I had accepted the lies.

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    28. Interesting, thanks for sharing! Did you use Firefox? Firefox has the same problem for me, my comment disappears, so I temporarily use a different browser to leave a comment.

      Well, in my past (3-4 years ago?), as I remember it, I used to have a somewhat similar line of thinking - that emotions are rich, important for a "balanced" life, seeking different ideas to try out. But, compared to "now", that state needed constant "maintenance", it was easy to put ideas into practice, but they were temporary (use it or lose it). But it seemed "magical", and I'd still be able to intuitively guess people (their "type"). And everything was extremely enjoyable, every new experience, I'd be like a sponge, absorbing new ideas and experiences and trying them out, but they'd be gone if I didn't give them attention, try them out; you get the gist.

      In contrast, what I have now makes "repetition" obsolete - laws of power, red pill, machiavellism, et cetera, are fully internalized in my psyche, and even if I don't practice or put them in use, they are there for me to use, already saved and categorized permanently, and I can use any skill I acquired at a moment's notice as if it's the most natural thing in the world. If there was something I didn't like or wanted to do before, I can now do it - case in point, let's say I neede to walk for a couple of hours, and it's nearly freezing outside; my sociopathic side allows me to not be bothered by cold, or sore muscles, while my empathic side gives me the "reward". I skip the initial harships or hurdles, even for unfavorable activities, while I enjoy the journey and reap the rewards (new skills, new experiences...). Additionally, by having both, if I need to act confused or sorrowful, I already know how it feels, what it's like, so I come out as truthful, with unfaked emotions and expressions, right away, without having to think about it (but I could "mimic" if I choose so).
      I don't "steal ideas", per se, I read them, internalize them, try them out, and create my own version - as another new skill or experience. As in, I don't really follow them religiously, but do my "own thing".

      In a lot of ways, it was similar to my current state - I consider them both as "at the top", both give you a flurry of creative ideas and insights.
      For my purposes, preferences, I'd say socioempathic is "superior", but it doesn't need to be for you or someone else, everyone finds their own way, forges their own path in life. If I compare "superempathy" to "socioempathy", I'd say "superempathy" is more "metaphysical, hedonistical, tactical, organical"... where as, "socioempathy" is more "practical, tactical-strategical, mechanical, dynamic"...

      That's it for now. I'm always happy to discuss with someone who has an open mind, and I greatly enjoy our conversation.
      I wish you lots of new discoveries and experiences! :-)

      P. S.
      I find that Motörhead lyrics contains a lot of truths, ideas to put into practice, their music compliments their lyrics and are very good at getting you into a particular state of mind, so you may be interested in listening to some of their songs (ie. Love can't buy you money, Just 'cause you got the power, Snaggletooth, I'm your man, Death or glory, I don't believe a word, Liar, Traitor, Electricity, Make 'em Blind, One more fucking time, Love me forever). Hope you enjoy!

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    29. I really have never thought much about the differences between being logical and rational. But it seems to me that sociopaths are more than capable of being rational when it concerns themselves. Logic seems to be a more rigid yet flexible tool-within their hands-they use to convince others.

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    30. @Socioempath
      Thanks for your thoughts. Learning to operate your own brain leads to so many good things. Let's catch up again as new discussions arise here. I feel this is a conversation worth patience.

      @Anon 5:26 that's an interesting distinction! The human brain evolved to convince, so perhaps with the sociopathic toolkit, what you say makes sense. Someone (you??) on the other thread mentioned the sociopath's logic being based on lies. My memory furnishes several examples of exactly this - a strategy on his part to get what he wanted based on my believing his train of lies... it makes perfect sense without the added 'premises' of our mammalian, human tendencies. Like he missed premises so the conclusion could not follow from a valid argument.

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    31. That was me who said their logic is based on lies. There was a lot of talk about honesty and therefore everything that was Said-by them-was true. I think they believed that loophole to some extent .

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    32. PP's/SP's have exceptional insight, and tend to tell you the "grains of truth", truth mixed with lies, as it's one of the best and most effective ways to lie. They can always fall back to the truth if you accuse them of lies, and come out clean. If you can filter out the truth from the lies, you can gain a lot of knowledge and insight.
      Nature, biology, and by extent, the human brain, hates the "vacuum", so the brain will fill the gaps with false information. A good example of this "filling" are horoscopes.

      - Remember that man who died in a car accident? That man who smoked more than two packs a day? Well, I don't want to make any claims, but I remember reading something about how cigarette smoke reduces lung capacity, leading to less oxygen getting to the brain, and as a consequence, slower reflexes and lowered attention. In addition, the cardiotoxicity can lead to lower blood pressure, and sometimes even seizures... The very act of lighting and smoking a cigarette after cigarette, takes away the concentration from driving, which also contributes to increased car crashes.
      So, if that man was a non-smoker, he would've avoided the horrible fate that has befallen him. Smoking kills, in more ways than one. Don't smoke and drive!

      See what I did there? Hehehehhehehhe :-)

      I recommend watching Nightcrawler if you're interested in seeing "socio-logic" in action. It's a really good movie with a sociopathic protagonist.

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    33. Socioempath, that's a key point about our minds filling the vacuum. The mind is a most potent pattern recognition machine - we can recognise an object based on less than 1% of the original information. The ability to 'fill the gaps' gives us the survival advantage of efficiency- very handy when there's a tiger in the woods.

      Then there are the emergent effects. The human brain is designed to design realities: we live in realities we construct. The power of our own beliefs is truly astounding: they shape the realities we recognise, they initiate our feelings and drive our behaviours. In short, we create our own prisons and set ourselves free.

      The psychopath does leverage this reality-creation or shortcut mechanism. We enmesh ourselves by believing them, trapping ourselves. My experience is that the psychopath acts instinctively- I shall not generalise: **-* acted instinctively with techniques and lines found to be effective through trial and error. But he genuinely believed he created my prison, he thought he *did that to me*. As I was saying to ESTP Sociopath, the drawback of basing ideas of your own success or power on the behaviour of others is that they are *actually* beyond your control.

      Do you know what happened when I discovered my key was the very same mechanism I used to create my prison? He ran away. Physically ran.

      I understand practically and cognitively how my mind works. My own 'mind magic' has endless potential for refinement and growth where **-* is trapped in instinct. I am disappointed; I'd wanted to discuss these things with him. He runs away because he lost a game that he designed. The Sorcerer's Apprentice. This is why a deep trust in one's own being - that organic, spontaneous freedom - is in my opinion so beautiful. It doesn't depend on complicated manoeuvring to obtain good things. Doesn't depend on others. There's less overhead, more flow, more presence. And yet I can engage with others in free and joyful ways.

      The psychopathic lens and methods are interesting, and I love it here. By I'm not enamoured or enchanted and I engage with the people here openly. I deeply appreciate all I have learnt here and though I challenge I certainly respect.

      Datapoints, baby. It's all about experiment.

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    34. @Anon 11:39

      I suppose they create their own realities too. It's amusing and enlightening in particular ways: just how powerful our minds are. You've reminded me of CS Lewis who said we run around every day with all sorts of competing notions in our heads. It doesn't matter so long as we're surviving.

      I think it was Lola who said it's a good idea not to overestimate or overvalue our own thoughts. They just bubble up and we can enjoy them for what they're worth. Same goes for feelings.

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    35. Imagination is a wonderful thing - it can let us make deductions, or keep us in a "comfort zone", it is up to the individual how he shall use it.

      Yes, even the "mightiest" psychopath will fall if he's always acting purely on his instincts. As he gets older, and he gradually loses the "raw power" he had in youth, it will become harder and harder for him to "succeed". If he leaves enough "victims", you can be sure the word will spread around.

      There are only so many chances for a "restart", and a person's time is limited and precious.
      What you do, how you behave, always follows you, affecting your behavior and other "uncontrollable factors". Even if somebody's lies and schemes are never discovered (proven), if that somebody keeps behaving destructively, time and time again, it will negatively affect his reputation - you reap what you sow.

      During my time as an "empath", I also came across a psychopath. And he was good, real good - 3 years "under his spell". Oh, you can be sure there were a lot of priceless fun moments. But as he acted more on instinct, the spell was eventually broken, and I cut off all contact with him. I didn't have to spread any rumors about him (I didn't do anything except radio silence), as I was glad I got away and recovered shortly, it all kinda got sorted out by itself, as practically nobody I know wants to have anything to do with him. Where he is now, I don't really know. Still, it was always a marvel to watch him in action.
      Anyway, my experience with the psychopath didn't really have any significant bearing on my becoming socioempathic, but was still an interesting experience - I didn't even know that he was a "psychopath", and how his mind really operates, only that he was a "slimy, self-interested parasitical compulsive liar", until I started to internalize "emotional control".

      In a lot of ways, I am glad I wasn't "born" a sociopath/psychopath, as I have an intuitive grasp over the "emotional mind", something the "real" (or undisciplined?) sociopath lacks. Consequently, my "drive" is towards understanding, personal enrichment, knowledge, self-improvement, freedom of choice. I am happy with myself, because I have achieved the "freedom of choice" I desired.

      When you know yourself, find out what works best for you, cultivate it, you essentially become unbreakable, as I'm sure you already know. And that will always grant you victory even when the odds seem impossible.
      I know myself, and now my ego works for me, to be molded however I wish, not the other way around. Detaching oneself from ego is a wonderful thing, it is the prerequisite for an open mind.

      In Lemmy's own words:
      "You need an open mind,
      Shiver up your spine,
      Electricity deep in your soul!"

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    36. North did he literally run away? How silly. I'm glad you didn't run. I'm glad I didn't either:-)

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    37. Socioempath,

      That's an interesting story. Did you figure he was a sociopath after you commenced your investigations?

      If you are willing to share: do you feel your progress has been 'with the grain' of your nature or against? How has that played out?

      Anon 3:36
      I saw him walking in a car park and called out to him. He turned, saw it was me and kept walking. I called again. He shook his head and walked much faster so I couldn't keep up without running. It was a visceral response from him; he clearly didn't want me anywhere near himself.

      Bit of cat-and-mouse leading up to that point.

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    38. I always "kinda knew" his nature, but figured the fun times were "worth it", up until it started to consistently affect me negatively, and he started to take me for a fool. But, as I said, I wouldn't trade the experiences for anything.

      As when I figured it out exactly? Well, as I said, when I started to gain my "socioempathy" - however, according to how I remember hom, I'd classify him more as a "psychopath" than a "sociopath".

      As for my "progress", well, I've always been logical and wanted to figure out things, and I considered overcoming hardships, being tough, and the like, as one of the most favorable traits a man could have. I can assure you, I am completely at peace with myself. I think you knows the feeling :-)

      So, I'd say it was definitely "with the grain" - as I'm interested in being free to do what I want, to experience new things, gain new skills, and I consider "power and money" the "keys" to all that, it allows me to gain power and money, so I'm free to do those things. In addition, it made me exceptionally patient and allows me to practically always "stay cool". I'm not interested in power and money "as themselves", I don't really want nor need to hoard them infinitely, I simply want to gain so much of them so as to not to have to worry about them; I'm interested in the freedom they can bring me. And socioempathy allows me to do exactly that - "Love can't buy you money".

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    39. Thanks Socioempath, I think we do share many similarities of approach even though they differ in character a little. Curiousity, freedom of self and peace.

      I'm also interested to hear your pursuit of power and money are as instrumental to your freedom. I think pursuit of those for their own sake leads to mere overhead: I seek freedom to choose.

      Cheers

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    40. "What you do, how you behave, always follows you, affecting your behavior and other "uncontrollable factors". Even if somebody's lies and schemes are never discovered (proven), if that somebody keeps behaving destructively, time and time again, it will negatively affect his reputation - you reap what you sow."

      This para interested me and it's something I'm learning. I've had a few "Corvette crashes" recently and am starting to see the value of cultivating more skill in the way I interact and present. Your words helped me crystallise this in my mind as a specific step to try next.

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    41. Well, I like driving (and fast, "cool" cars), travelling, meeting new people... A lot of the things I'd like to do, hobbies that interest me, are expensive and cost money. But many of them also aren't, of course. If being able to do whatever I want meant having no money, I'd happily give it all in a heartbeat. But that's just because of my experience - obviously, yours is different, so your preferences are different.

      I've already experienced how it's like to live without much money, without much power, and the choices you have are very, VERY limited; there isn't much freedom, you don't get to enjoy much of anything. I don't think it's much of a "life" for anyone looking to experience all that this world can offer us - living frugally, always depending on others, that just simply ain't my style... That may be one of the reasons of my becoming socioempathic.

      Thank you for the discussions. I greatly enjoyed them. Cheers to you too! :-)

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    42. As to your second comment, it may have to do with the brain's "pattern recognition" - people notice how people act around you, their opinions about you, who you associate with, their "state" after you come into contact with them... People talk, and guarding your reputation is one of the "laws of power". I don't believe in "karma", but I think it's the closest thing to it in real life - a few "bad things" don't mean a thing, but keep doing them, without cultivating a reputation of a "good-doer", and doing "good things", and the result is...

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    43. "cultivating a reputation of a "Good-doer." the sociopath I knew was very aware of this. Doing "good things " that always just seemed off to me. They really were not aware how off they were. They might as well have just made a great big ridiculous gingerbread house.

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    44. North about the sociopath running away-i found the truth seems to short them out. It is something they literally have to remove themselves from. They couldn't even stand it for me to even think certain things and asked me to stop having certain thoughts. The truth is far too overwhelming for them.

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    45. It's probably the fear of loss of control. The fear might come from failures and catastrophes in their past, while they were still growing up, unaware of their "true nature".
      If you think about it, people hate "different", and the thought of someone unaffected by "morality, guilt, traditions" scares them - if somebody breaks the "status quo", doesn't conform to society's expectations, mindsets, values... they will be either made to conform or ostracized.

      If the sociopath considers you as someone that requires too much effort, as in you can't be controlled by them in any way, and you might even be detrimental to them (ie. you waste too much of their time, they risk "exposing" themselves), they might just decide to cut you off and stay away from you - but it depends on the sociopath in question, as I think some sociopaths might try to "ostracize" or "destroy" you in various ways (say, by getting people to dislike you/protect him) if they fear you are too much of a threat to them.

      One thing I have learned during my "empath phase", that I have even now as a socioempath (and it works for me, at least), is that there is a certain "gut instinct", unrelated to logic or emotion; if I sense something is "off" or "wrong", despite the facts (logic) and emotions pointing that nothing is wrong, that gut instinct came true every time. I can't really descibe it, but words "too good to be true" come to mind.
      You might be able to recognize that instinct in yourself, and cultivate it. It never let me down when I listened to it.

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    46. Thank you socioempath for your thoughts. I absolutely agree.

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    47. Although I don't think that people hate things that are different. I think people can be fearful of things they don't understand. Since sociopaths insist in operating on a covert level they put their ownselves at risk.

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    48. Well, I think you are partly right. It is my opinion that people hate different, because they don't understand it (and they also don't like change, loving their habits). "Too different" tends to attract attention and disdain. Somewhat different can be seen as "quirky". A very fine example is rivalries between football clubs (hooligans beating each other), or "political corectness", or wearing clothes that piss people off. A lot of "geniuses" that advanced our knowledge, understanding and civilization, that we revere today, were shunned in their time for being "different".

      You gotta understand, the sociopath sees things in a different way, the way your mind operates is as alien to him as his mind is to you, and his experiences tend to confirm that he is "right" (just as your experiences make up your opinions, values, et cetera).
      Just as you will feel the urge to help somebody in pain, feel angry when "betrayed" and maybe try to seek revenge on your "traitor", he has his own urges.
      Just as you won't neccessarily act on your urges, it doesn't neccessarily mean he will act on his - everybody is different. It certainly helps when you know how to deal with them (appeal to their self-interest and the like...).

      All I can say to you is, trust yourself and your gut instinct, especially when dealing with one - he can either help you with something the "normal" people consider "taboo, forbiden...", but, as you experienced, he can also "ruin" you. All I know is, when the stakes are high, I'd rather have a "good sociopath" (one that has a good reputation, won't needlessly and impulsively manipulate...) by my side than a "normal" person who might panic and make a fatal mistake.

      Cheers!

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    49. Thank you. I am always interested in another viewpoint. It is very hard for me to understand. I don't know if they think they ruined me. I do however think we both ruined the way we see each other. That is something that is unfortunately irreversible. Thank you again and cheers:-)

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    50. Thanks for the interesting viewpoints Socioempath and Anon.

      I agree that trusting yourself and your own instincts is the best way.

      Never say never! The story isn't static, it always evolves with time and experience.

      At Socioempath, I see again we concur on some points and you add richness at other points. I'm reminded it's time for me to articulate my philosophy. Massive project.

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  30. PS-Per my post above: I do not think I am a super judgemental person, but I do think that people should stay within their own species and be adults, before they are subject to "the game". Thoughts???

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  31. My life became devastated when my husband sent me packing, after 8 years that we have been together. I was lost and helpless after trying so many ways to make my husband take me back. One day at work, i was absent minded not knowing that my boss was calling me, so he sat and asked me what its was all about i told him and he smiled and said that it was not a problem. I never understand what he meant by it wasn't a problem getting my husband back, he said he used a spell to get his wife back when she left him for another man and now they are together till date and at first i was shocked hearing such thing from my boss. He gave me an email address of the great spell caster who helped him get his wife back, i never believed this would work but i had no choice that to get in contact with the spell caster which i did, and he requested for my information and that of my husband to enable him cast the spell and i sent him the details, but after two days, my mom called me that my husband came pleading that he wants me back, i never believed it because it was just like a dream and i had to rush down to my mothers place and to my greatest surprise, my husband was kneeling before me pleading for forgiveness that he wants me and the kid back home, then i gave Happy a call regarding sudden change of my husband and he made it clear to me that my husband will love me till the end of the world, that he will never leave my sight. Now me and my husband is back together again and has started doing pleasant things he hasn't done before, he makes me happy and do what he is suppose to do as a man without nagging. Please if you need help of any kind, kindly contact Happy for help and you can reach him via email: happylovespell2@gmail.com


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  32. Please help. Just discovered I've been a fake all my life. Empathy for lack of self is present. I feel lost especially now that i see why there is nothing there in me. How do i carry on. Is it possible to construct a self. I desire to shed my mask for good. Is that even possible?

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    ReplyDelete

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