I found this quote from W.H. Auden to be thought-provoking:
The state of enchantment is one of certainty. When enchanted, we neither believe nor doubt nor deny: we know, even if, as in the case of a false enchantment, our knowledge is self-deception.
All folk tales recognize that there are false enchantments as well as true ones. When we are truly enchanted we desire nothing for ourselves, only that the enchanting object or person shall continue to exist. When we are falsely enchanted, we desire either to possess the enchanting being or be possessed by it.
We are not free to choose by what we shall be enchanted, truly or falsely. In the case of a false enchantment, all we can do is take immediate flight before the spell really takes hold.
Recognizing idols for what they are does not break their enchantment.
All true enchantments fade in time. Sooner or later we must walk alone in faith. When this happens, we are tempted, either to deny our vision, to say that it must have been an illusion and, in consequence, grow hardhearted and cynical, or to make futile attempts to recover our vision by force, i.e., by alcohol or drugs.
A false enchantment can all too easily last a lifetime.
I feel like sociopaths deal in the currency of enchantments all the time. It's essentially what I mean by seducing someone -- to enchant someone, to put them under a spell. But, I also think (using Auden's tautology) that not all of my seductions involve a false enchantment. I know they don't, because many of them have led to life long friendships.
And as Auden's quote applies to this type of seduction, I think that whether or not something is a true or false enchantment often has more to do with the person being enchanted than the person doing the enchantment or the nature of the enchantment. I know myself that I have had hopeless crushes or obsessions on people that were not instigated at all by the person and reflect more a projection of my own ideals or idealizations on to the person. And actually, I think this comports with Auden's own experience -- that most of his early erotic encounters involved a gross inequality between the partners, either between age or intelligence, but were initiated because Auden had constructed in them a sort of idealized "Alter Ego", as he called it. It wasn't until his relationship with Chester Kallman until he found an equal, that he finally considered the relationship a marriage. So, yes, the sociopath is the one facilitating the enchantment (I don't think the sociopath can actually generate it out of thin air, consider the anti-seducer). But the sociopath has not control over whether there is a false or true enchantment.
That said, I get emails all of the time from someone who is under the throes of a false enchantment that has lasted much too long for their preference.
The state of enchantment is one of certainty. When enchanted, we neither believe nor doubt nor deny: we know, even if, as in the case of a false enchantment, our knowledge is self-deception.
All folk tales recognize that there are false enchantments as well as true ones. When we are truly enchanted we desire nothing for ourselves, only that the enchanting object or person shall continue to exist. When we are falsely enchanted, we desire either to possess the enchanting being or be possessed by it.
We are not free to choose by what we shall be enchanted, truly or falsely. In the case of a false enchantment, all we can do is take immediate flight before the spell really takes hold.
Recognizing idols for what they are does not break their enchantment.
All true enchantments fade in time. Sooner or later we must walk alone in faith. When this happens, we are tempted, either to deny our vision, to say that it must have been an illusion and, in consequence, grow hardhearted and cynical, or to make futile attempts to recover our vision by force, i.e., by alcohol or drugs.
A false enchantment can all too easily last a lifetime.
I feel like sociopaths deal in the currency of enchantments all the time. It's essentially what I mean by seducing someone -- to enchant someone, to put them under a spell. But, I also think (using Auden's tautology) that not all of my seductions involve a false enchantment. I know they don't, because many of them have led to life long friendships.
And as Auden's quote applies to this type of seduction, I think that whether or not something is a true or false enchantment often has more to do with the person being enchanted than the person doing the enchantment or the nature of the enchantment. I know myself that I have had hopeless crushes or obsessions on people that were not instigated at all by the person and reflect more a projection of my own ideals or idealizations on to the person. And actually, I think this comports with Auden's own experience -- that most of his early erotic encounters involved a gross inequality between the partners, either between age or intelligence, but were initiated because Auden had constructed in them a sort of idealized "Alter Ego", as he called it. It wasn't until his relationship with Chester Kallman until he found an equal, that he finally considered the relationship a marriage. So, yes, the sociopath is the one facilitating the enchantment (I don't think the sociopath can actually generate it out of thin air, consider the anti-seducer). But the sociopath has not control over whether there is a false or true enchantment.
That said, I get emails all of the time from someone who is under the throes of a false enchantment that has lasted much too long for their preference.
What is the "true" enchantment that makes you continue living your life, day by day?
ReplyDelete"I know they don't, because many of them have led to life long friendships."
ReplyDeleteBut if thats true, why is the following possible:
"That said, I get emails all of the time from someone who is under the throes of a false enchantment that has lasted much too long for their preference."
Why is a long lasting relationsship first a sign against a false enchantment but afterwards long relationsships can still be a false one?
Thats confusing. Its either a true enchantment, because you know it is one, or its a false one, because you know it isnt a true one. Time is obviously (!) not a matter about that.
And I'd say thats why this sentence:
"But the sociopath has not control over whether there is a false or true enchantment."
Is pure convenience. Thats only a lazy excuse to not take responsibility of your actions. Because you are always responsible for your impact on your fellows. If you are just not able to control yourself, this weakness doesnt change your responsibility.
Humans should at least be able to control themselves, shouldnt they? Still only a few seem to be able to manage that.
A disciplined mind is they key to take over true control.
Btw that applies to both sides. Who gets enchanted, whether that should be a true of false one, is responsible for his/her actions.
Do sociopaths "endure" dinners with their non-psychopathic relatives..?
ReplyDeleteThis is like a rapist saying they aren't responsible. Pure. Rubbish.
ReplyDeleteI can understand false enchantments. The heart yearns for something always and so long as it doesn't have it, it will always try to replace it with something else. That, however, will never work. You can't replace the Creator with creation.
ReplyDeleteSo about 10 months in, and about 3 weeks with fellow Muslims in an Arabic course, I'm finally starting to get more comfortable with the co-religionists and not just the religion itself. I'm experiencing what is theoretically so obvious yet so rare to see actualized: if you don't judge people, give them space & time, they gravitate towards the good by themselves. That is the case for the vast, vast majority of people.
I find this fascinating:
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Bel4lheTfA
So the question is who is responsible for an enchantment? False or true enchantment I really don't see the difference since most of what people believe is an illusion anyway. If they become enchanted with the illusion that is me is it my fault or theirs? Well my question is "Why does it matter?"
DeleteI have many people everyday falling under my personal enchantment. I get hit on, job offers, invites returning customers who make excuses to come get more of whatever I am selling/creating at the time. Do I "cast my spell" on purpose? Yes and no. I am enchanting because I worked many years to become so, so long that the enchanting me is now my natural state, I enchant as a unconscious function but I can turn up the charm to even higher levels if I need to.
So people get enchanted. So what? It is on them if want to pursue me. That is their choice. It is my choice on weather I let them into my life or not. Again as free humans this is our lot and rights.
That people seem to desire what I am and want to be part of my life is up to them and if I allow it or not is up to me. As long as I am upfront and honest about my intentions there should be no problem here. The problem comes if the enchanter has ulterior motives and is not presenting their true self. Is this your complaint Anons? I don't experience this since I practice rather rigorous honesty in this respect. I always inform new friends and lovers what I am and what they can expect. If they decide to pursue a relationship anyway, well then, that is on them is it not?
Most do, all stay enchanted. I am not responsible for the choices of others unless I have given them false information. This is one of the reasons I urge other sociopaths to be honest in their dealings.
@Puppy Basket
DeleteUnfortunately, our natural charm and power of enchantment isn't viewed so innocently by empaths. But, i agree wholeheartedly. I definitely try to be honest in my dealings and it does alleviate many of the issues that may arise when people around me feel "falsely enchanted".
-Fellow Sociopath
I think we all deal in the currency of enchantments, but, in the case of a sociopath... aren't they falsely enchanted with the "desire to seduce" to the same extent the enchantee has the false "desire to be seduced"? Otherwise it wouldn't happen. Both are enchanted with an idea... an equal but opposite desire related to seduction (which is a form of connection... the underlying desire).
ReplyDelete"When we are falsely enchanted, we desire either to possess the enchanting being or be possessed by it."
The problems arise when the desires are unconscious and we have no idea why we want to possess or be possessed. And/or when one does not agree with their situation.
M.
This post really, really bothered me. In one point it seems as if the object of desire is at fault. To me it's the same as blaming a victim of rape. Damn it. Its so hard to believe these people even exist. After everything I still feel pity for the sociopath. I just imagine them as a child. Were they ever innocent?
ReplyDeleteIt is a difficult concept to apply across the board. But if you're thinking of two adults... one who "consciously" enjoys seducing and another who "consciously" enjoys being seduced, then there would seem to be a match there.
DeleteIf you're thinking of a rape victim and rapist then that is a leap beyond enchantment. I would never blame a rape victim. People have a responsibility to respect the boundaries of others. Someone can have an inappropriate desire to over-power another in that way but they still have the responsibility to control themselves, to use restraint.
On the other hand, if someone noticed a "pattern" of experiences they kept having, of being over-powered in some way, then i would hope they would try to figure out why it keeps happening. But that's only if there is some continual pattern, versus an attack. There's obviously nothing enchanting or acceptable about rape.
M.
2:54 with all due respect how do you read this post and compare this to rape victims. This could be your own projection and something triggering you inside. :( and if it is I do feel for you. But Just know that ME would never advocate for rapists to rape and enchant power over them.
DeleteLike M said we all have a responsibility to respect people's personal boundaries no matter who you are. Sociopathic or not. Most sociopathic trait individuals are not rapists. I'm tipping off the scale a little into saying that there's rageful assholes who rape victims who are not sociopathic at all and maybe sociopathic. I'm saying this to keep things in perspective. It helps the mind set at neutral not at extremes.
Enchanting to me is just charming the individual. Empath or not -- it's a normal trait everyone has. Cluster b types know how to implement this and tip the scale a little bit more. If someone enchanted me and I like it ....I'm also enchanting them - it's a two way exchange. To be charmed as well as give it back. Supposedly I'm not a sociopath because I feel things - but who the fuck cares because I can feel too much. It's a curse more than a blessing. I'd rather implement how the sociopath has control inside and control over their own feelings. Feelings are good when we can control them and stabilize them. Like using them within the right context and proving compassion.
Empathy is good to have. but I'm tired of feeling things that my body can't handle, it's too overrated for me now. I feel it and vhalla -arthritis.
Compassion, sympathy and intellectual empathy have greater and long lasting effects I believe. It keeps one onward and forward not stagnant is feelings. Stuck. Yuck.
If I see a fight of some type on TV or just someone is providing detail on it I'm actually taking in the bullets. It hurts. How fucked up is that. Lol Not all the time but most of the time.
I believe that's how my body falls into an autoimmune arthritic flare. I've had juvenile arthritis sines I was a kid and I'm thirty eight years old. Lol. I absorb situations instead of just observing them. I'm unlearning the absorbent process though and learning to observe because I'm exhausted of felling too much. It's not balanced.
^ Lol my speech. Maybe I'm talking to virtual air maybe I'm not and someone's listening.
DeleteM. & superchick you both have really made me think and i really appreciate other viewpoints. This post touched a nerve with me-i believe because I feel there is seduction and then there is just flat out lying. When you realize someone lied to you about basically everything it can feel like rape. You feel like you were raped by a stranger. I feel a deep disconnect from my body. I understand what you mean superchick-about internalizing pain. I just feel sick a lot and feel very waif like as if I'm slipping away. Repulsion is a strange thing. It is completely physical. I don't know how to shake it.
DeleteAnon 6:05:
DeleteIt is emotional rape.
You (and I) made serious personal investment decisions based on lies. It's a power transfer you don't even imagine is happening and thus have no idea you need to be wary of, to protect yourself from. Something inconceivable, and one's whole physical organism reels to make space for it.
It is a physical process, understanding it, coming to terms with it. The experience changes you deeply, irrevocably.
Auden said one can choose cynicism, a denial of the enchantment, or futile recapture.
I say integration is the fruitful path.
You won't slip away. That repulsion: go with it. Don't fight yourself, embrace yourself because your brain, your whole being can handle this. It just takes time. Maybe a lot of time.
It might seem strange but I eventually found the "truth" of the enchantment was myself. My hidden, lost, broken or underdeveloped capacities had been given an iridescent birth in a vision fed by him but generated from me.
Vision is the great human precursor to realisation.
Now is a special time of re-creation. We can create a broader, more vast life for ourselves encompassing ever more of what we are capable of.
Superchick, you wrote:
DeleteCompassion, sympathy and intellectual empathy have greater and long lasting effects I believe. It keeps one onward and forward not stagnant is feelings. Stuck. Yuck.
This is a great point. With him, I have to develop a cognitive empathy of sorts because I can't experience the way he does. I can only model using proxies, analogies, reverse engineering. I can barely hope to get it right; but what I can do is regard him as fully human, to offer him that full dignity, to take full responsibility for myself and to communicate.
And the remarkable result is that I see more and more the genesis of my own broken patterns and how to resolve them.
I really like what you say here about keeping onwards and forwards.
North after I read this post I got that Leonard Cohen line stuck into head about David seeing her bathing on the roof. I think it's the tendency to objectify that really bothers me. Its wrapped in something else but it's really an inability to see someone. That lack of respect, thinking if you like something take it. Its so primal and vulgar to me. . And I understand seduction. I am just naturally seductive by nature. But I feel like I was seen as a gazelle . And I was just being myself.
DeleteAnon I understand. And I'm sorry your hurting. It does feel like emotional rape being lied too. I promise in time you will be able to shake the feeling inside. Your better equip now. Try to look at it this way. If it weren't for that experience in your life previously - it could have been worse with someone else. You now know what to look for and the signs to scope out with your next potential partner. Life wants you to be at peace and content. Not all sociopaths are the same. There's huge jerks in life and there's many with high ethical standards that find lying a waste of time and know it has absolutely no advancement in a relationship. I'm not talking about little white lies , everyone succumbs on occasion ( there actually study on it) , I'm talking about huge lies that pollute everything that comes out of their mouths. Best of luck.
DeleteNorth , your awesome, I appreciate your feedback. Iron sharpens iron - I learn a lot from your viewpoints. I really take them in. We have so much to learn from each other. :) bAnd yes analogies, reverse engineer & proxies so bang on..
I just finished butchering ducks. I kinda feel sociopathic, I like this switch mode - it makes me see how we need them. The work they do that others can take for granted.
But I'm odd I thank the bird for its life and say a blessing over it. Give it a hug. I'm sooo tired. Can't wait till bed soon.
Superchick thank you for your kind words. I'm so exhausted myself. I'm learning to just let it go. I've had to see people for what they are. That is so hard when you really want to believe something about them that just isn't there. When you finally let it go its almost a relief. But still exhausting. And i can't help but feeling like someone's Guardian Angel walked away.
DeleteHi Anon,
DeleteIt's funny you mention Leonard Cohen. I listened to Hallelujah many times!
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, but love is not a victory march..."
Such a powerful line. We have different conceptions of what love is. Of what we are. Of what others are. And that's okay. Eventually, I felt OK with that. That his experience is so different to mine is ok. That he sees things in a particular way is ok. Even if sociopaths assert their view, that's ok. It's still just a view, just an approach. They might see it as a game, a challenge, a battle - whatever! It might spark our competitiveness: and it so often does. But we don't have to be the gazelle. We don't have to convince them we are not the gazelle. We don't even have to outrun them. We can simply be who we are, experience things as we naturally do. We're incentivised (biologically) in a particular way; they in another. There's no one right way of seeing the world and interacting with it.
That's how I came to terms with it all, fwiw.
Superchick: thankyou! Yes, your posts are sharp and insightful for me too. You present an accessible angle that I learn from.
As for too much empathy - I experienced this pretty badly. Perhaps for different reasons, who knows. I could feel others' pain all the time, and couldn't distinguish it as mine or other. That's something I've learnt since leaving my ex. I can distinguish easily now and it's not burdensome as it previously was.
North we can just be who we are. We have to be. I want to be. Thank you for reminding me.
DeleteM. And north-i read something from Jung about shadow selves. How in order to be whole we must come to terms with our shadows. Even though I don't really see the world as wrong or right I do tend to associate myself with goodness. I just have never had many negative thoughts. But I have done plenty of selfish things. Seeing that extreme has really helped me. What I rejected in Them-the sociopath-is what I tend to avoid in myself. I don't identify with being a sociopath because it never occurred to me to play the games they do. But I do get that spectrum. If you haven't read it you might find it interesting.
DeleteThanks Anon. During the saga and beyond, I did several things I hadn't previously imagined myself capable of. Perhaps that forced me to be open because I was also reconciling my own behaviour.
DeleteGavin de Becker in the Gift of Fear encourages us to imagine playing out our darkest impulses. We are all capable of atrocity. It's important to grasp that - perhaps it's part of our shadow? - in order to know ourselves better. This in turn helps us comprehend (and even better: to predict) others.
I'll look up Jung - do you have a good reference?
Now I got to think of you North whenever I hear Hallelujah, I prefers the John Cale cover...
Delete-Cnaym
The sad part of this from the sociopath point of view is that the lies are totally unnecessary. I have had many relationships since coming out and I am always upfront with my lovers. First date I lay it all on the table. Most sociopaths play this game because they think that no one would ever take them as they are. Funny thing, I have never had a man's interest drop after I have given them "the talk". Most seem even more intrigued. It has been a long while since I have been married for 20 something years now. I used to play the game and I see just as many normals playing games in love as sociopaths do. I blame society for this.
DeleteWe seem to be taught to present a false front until we have "sealed the deal". We all learn seduction techniques growing up, taught by media and peers and even parents sometimes. I think the major complaint of normals who have been seduced by sociopaths is not that we lied or presented ourselves falsely since everyone pretty much does that, it is a specific lie. The one where we said we loved you. When you discovered we could not in fact ever love that was the deepest of betrayals. I think it makes you feel unlovable, yes? You are not we just can;t get there.
Most sociopaths think that they will get no relationship if they let people know they cannot do the love thing. That had not been my many years of experience. We are enchanting enough that most, men at least, will accept the loss of my emotional involvement if my intellectual and social involvement compensates. Most have said they felt more loved in a relationship with me than with an actual emoter. They liked it better because they always knew where they stood with me. If they displeased me I would tell them how and what they needed to do to fix it as soon as it happened. I would not sit on the displeasure and then make them guess what they did wrong and then bring up old shit that had happened that had nothing to do with the problem to make them feel bad like I have seen emoter women do. They always knew where they stood with me.
Anon as someone who is in a life relationship with another socio/aspie we can be difficult to deal with in our own way. I would suggest looking at yourself and finding out what attracts you to us to begin with. This is not a dig or a put down. I have several friends that are what we call sociopath-nip. They attract, and are attracted to sociopaths exclusively. Most sociopath men have a type if they are still playing the game and not interested in a fulfilling relationship. They are looking for someone that believes lies indiscriminately and without examining them and has an idealized viewpoint of other people. Ones that tend to think the best of other people even in the light of evidence to the contrary.
When I suggested one of my friends drop the sociopath she was dating and get, at least, a better quality of sociopath her answer was. "The heart wants what the heart wants".
DeleteI myself am unseducable. This is because I have complete self knowledge. I know who I amm what I am and what I want. If I don't want you then nothing you can do will change my mind to want you. If I do want you sexually I will just tell you that. Then I will explain what/who I am and ask you questions to determine if we are compatible and that you are interested and can handle the relationship. We will make rules of the relationship and then if agreeable we will move on from there. Why the fuck everyone does not do this is beyond me. Yes it turns sex into a negotiation but then sex is always a negotiation. "Oh Noes!" you say, "that is not romantic at all!" Well, no, that is the point. Romance is an illusion sold by hallmark and Harlequin romances and drunk playwrights.
Everyone always says romance does not last. Of course it does not. It is part of the game. This game is played by normal and socio both. You have to manufacture romance so it is by default a lie. People put so much weight on the romance of a relationship and then get disenchanted when it implodes or fades. Yet what is romance? Lets examine that for a moment.
When we say a date was romantic it means it was staged. The lighting, the location, the gifts, the pre-practiced dialogue. Lets be clear then that was a lie. A pre-planned lie to make the stager appear in a better light and to dupe the stagee into being charmed. It follows a script handed down from literature and media. It has an agenda. Sociopaths are not the only ones htat do it. The difference in a romantic gesture from a sociopath and normal is not intent or motive but seduction and appearing as something they are not is the same goal. No difference in the fact that it is a game and a lie for the same goal of seducing the object of their desire. Now my question is why the sociopath gets hated for doing this and the normal does not? I believe it is because of the long term consequences. If a normal does this the object of affection has at least a chance of a loving relationship as the outcome. The romantic gesture coming from a normal "may" be backed up by true emotional intent. The sociopath, not so much.
Now here is the life lesson children: The seduction itself is ALWAYS A LIE. It is a lie you demand of a potential partner so you can live the illusion you have been fed since birth of what love should be.
So what do you really want? Do you want love? Then find someone who express it correctly. Not someone who mouths the words. Look at how they treat you. Do they treat you like an object? Like a possession? Yes? Get out. Normal or socio that is not what you need. Do they ask your opinion often and then actually listen to and act on it? Then they see you as a person and an equal. Are they honest with you?
That is a keeper whether they are sociopath or normal.
Here is another test. watch how they treat other people and how they talk about other people. Do they constantly put everyone else down? Do they talk about how stupid other people are? Do they treat strangers with respect of disdain?
You can tell what people really are only if you can keep part of yourself apart and watch without becoming attached to the outcome. Observe what they do as an outsider with no investment in the relationship. Most normals can't do this in the moment but in your time away from them dissect the time you spend together like an impartial observer. Pretend you are not yourself but a friend of yours and then, as that friend write down what you see from a watchers point of view of the relationship. Then ask yourself, as that friend, would you let your friend date this person?
Puppy baskets thank you for your response. I find so many things you say extremely helpful. And I think your right. I can see now why someone could go all apocalypse now and find themselves up the river a few clicks setting up shop. It truly is the horror of discovering someone is a complete and total fabrication. And this isnt someone I just met on the internet. And I agree they did not need to lie. But they love lying.
DeleteAnd I'm sure some people do expect cliche courting. I thought it was unnecessary and I told them that. I thought they just didn't know any better. And they didn't. But it was so much more than that.
DeleteI realize that I have to examine myself. I know attraction happens for a reason. There is something that transcends lies and truth.
DeleteAnd quite frankly the whole cliche romance thing is where sociopaths just. Don't. Get. It. There is no date required. You just want to be with that person. There is a tangible electricity in the air. There is no staging or fancy dates that can reproduce that.
DeleteAnd believe me I experienced lots of staged fancy dates. I didn't know I was being wined and dined to death. I just thought they really enjoyed eating.
DeletePuppy baskets I really am as silly and naive as I may sound but in my defense they did get others to back up their lies. I had no idea. They worked really really hard to deceive me. And that's just the way it is. But my question to you is do you ever feel like the part you play personally is to open others eyes? Do you ever feel like there is a larger plan at work?
Deleteshit-myth 1: psychopaths just use everybody & cares only for themselves! reality: psychopaths like certain people just like most people do. shit-myth 2: Psychopaths dont have a conscience, this means they are amoral! reality: psychopaths are raised by parents and get, yes, morals from them. Morals are "ideas" about whats wrong or right, not feelings. Any more old shit-myths..?
ReplyDeleteShit-myth #3 Sociopaths are incapable of long term relationships.
DeleteME wrote:
ReplyDeleteI think that whether or not something is a true or false enchantment often has more to do with the person being enchanted than the person doing the enchantment or the nature of the enchantment. I know myself that I have had hopeless crushes or obsessions on people that were not instigated at all by the person and reflect more a projection of my own ideals or idealizations on to the person.
ME, I struggled to understand the true/false dichotomy presented by Auden, but you give a good clue to it here. There is always some "truth" to it because our own selves generate our realities moment to moment.
There's something special in an enchantment, though, that draws us beyond ourselves, beyond the glass darkly through which we normally see. Perhaps some hidden part of us finds a resonance that compels us to jump into the rabbit-hole, to explore a Wonderland we barely dreamed of with capacities that find unexpected expression in a shape-shifting realm of possibility.
Curiosity is the fuel for enchantment but also the vehicle for realising vision.
Dare to ask: what was it that caught you? What is it you want?
i believe what auden means is, if you truly love someone or something, you want it so live on and be happy, even if it is without you. if it was a selfish thing than indeed it only exists for you and how can you ever let it go; it must reflect on you and your failure in managing to keep it.
ReplyDeletethis may be the root of the "sociopath's" problem with obsession. it is all about him or herself, and experiencing failure is not something that person is accustomed to. it is more about this--the realization, as morgan said, in mistaking a projection as a true love or, in some cases, cutting off that real love but without anticipating the pain that would follow, and then the time it takes to integrate and make sense of that. the failure in itself, however it manifested, was shock enough and takes years, in my experience, to correctly incorporate and catagorize what exactly happened and then integrate all unexpected and unknown feelings into a mind that has never before had to deal with them. it can be traumatizing.
my wonder is, if it was both real and an enchantment, as is the problem with idealists and "sociopaths", then what? the person who has these issues mind operates in a concrete manner and he or she needs help to incorporate the experience. many intensely emotional experiences need help to be integrated, but there is no help to be found. m.e. is taking the steps towards helping people, even if all of this is presented as food for thought, and this is where people's minds need to be shifted in dealing with criminals and other individuals who have problems masked with deceit
M.E.-
ReplyDeleteDan Layus, the lead singer of the band Augustana is a HOT TAMALE, don't you think???
~Vegas
M.E.-
DeleteI bought tickets to see them in concert, but something came up, and I ended up not being able to go.:( SO SAD!!!
~Vegas
M.E.-
DeletePS-Remember that 311 "Amber" song I posted???
I love how that video starts out.:) I have never had a hammock, but I've always wanted one.:) I do have a few sets of those hanging beads!!! I love the way they look, and the way they feel, when walking through them...
I imagine you to be like "Amber".:)
~Vegas
M.E.-
DeletePPS-Regarding your post:
I love this W.H. Auden poem, that was in the movie "Four Weddings and a Funeral:
W. H. Auden
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
FuneralBlues
~Vegas
Song of the Day:
DeleteBush
ChemicalsBetweenUs
I want you to remember
A love so full it could send us all ways
I want you to surrender
All my feelings rose today
And I want you to remain
The power of children can amaze
I'll try not to complain
I know that's a pisser baby
The chemicals between us
The walls that lie between us
Lying in this bed
The chemicals displaced
There is no lonelier place
Than lying in this bed
I want you to remember
Everything you said
Every driven word
Like a hammer, held, to my head
The chemicals between us
There is no lonelier place
Then lying in this bed
The chemicals displaced
There is no lonelier place
Than lying in this bed
The chemicals between us
The chemicals between us
Lying in this bed
We're of the hollow men
We are the naked ones
We never meant you harm
Never meant you wrong
I'd like to thank
All of my lovers, lovers, lovers
The chemicals between us
The army of achievers
Lying in this bed
The chemicals displaced
There is no lonelier face
Than lying in this bed
The chemicals between us
The chemicals between us
The chemicals
The chemicals between us
~Vegas
Your feelings are cringe-worthy and repulsing ewwwwwww
DeleteVegas I so love your spirit. Keep shining girl! :-)
ReplyDeleteI was thinking the same thing. Vegas don't ever loose your shine. You and I have to watch that Anna Green Gables together with some baked cheesy nachos and salsa. That girl in that movie has zest and is a breath of fresh air. You do make people feel better about themselves. Your magnetic in a refreshing way.
DeleteVegas do you have Facebook?
North do you as well. I go on it sometimes. It would just be good to see a face to your names. I've been coming to this blog for almost three years now and sometimes it would be nice to know some of you a little bit more.
Sometimes I really connect with people and think..... Fuck I know in abit we'll lose touch because people stop coming to the blog. It's like we invest abit here and there -- than its gone. But with other social media you connect differently because you see more. Only to your comfort level. No pressure.
Anyone else on different social media ?
U come to a psychopath blog asking people for their names. Are you stupid?!
Deletewhat do you think the people here will do with your name anon? stalk you haha? look, all you need is a little programming knowledge and you can have almost all information you want... so there is no name necessary if anyone intends to do whatever you think he will do...
DeleteHey Superchick, you can find me at spinningnorth [AT] g mail [doT] com or Twitter @spinningnorth
Deleteactually, it's north.spinning.scenarios [AT] g mail [dot] com for the email address. Detail is not my thing, lol.
DeleteLol , hey good. Not on Twitter but will put your email in my phone :-)
DeleteAnon @ 5 PM-
DeleteTHANK YOU!!!
I LOVE YOUR SPIRIT, AND HOPE YOU KEEP SHINING, TOO!!!
~Vegas
Superchick-
DeleteThank you, for the compliments!!!
I WON'T EVER LOSE MY SHINE!!!
I know you will keep shining, too!!!
I LOVE MOVIES AND CHEESY NACHOS WITH SALSA!!! YUMMY!!!
We'll have to do that, at M.E.'s party!!! YEAH!!!
~Vegas
Anon 612
ReplyDeleteI don't use my real full name on social media. But even if I did - I do trust a few on this blog not to kill me. Lol. It's a sociopath blog. Most people on this blog are not sociopaths. It's rare to come across one. And even if I do 99% of sociopaths do not fuckeen kill people. They are contributing individuals like you and I. That means I do trust more sociopathic trait individuals over some empaths I come across. And visa versa. Labels mean nothing to me.
If I came across a "psychopath" killer which is probably 1% of population, have fun trying to find me. I'm off grid. Plus I've worked at a psychiatric facility in forensics before. Been on many level ones with some. I know what to look for. And the group home I work at part time is a locked facility. If something could happen / it would be there ...not online.
Anyway this was more a social media call for Vegas and North in my previous comment and yes even a few more I'd connect with. If not, that's okay, I respect people's comfort level. I've been around this blog for a few years now. I guess it can get abit tiresome knowing that you invest here and there and eventually never see them again because it's a blog.
So fuck off ;) I'm not stupid.
http://strategyandanalytics.com/9-facts-serial-killers-wish-never-knew/
ReplyDeleteActually 1% is probably too high take a look at these stats.
Nice post Superchick thank you for finding this. I am sure though that the Poison statistics are actually off. Probably WAY off. Most poisoners never get caught. it is hard to catch and even then harder to prove depending on the poison you use. Most drug overdoses and overdoses of prescribed medicines are also not counted as poisoning even though many killers use this method. If you want to get away with murder this is the way to go. Some poisons are almost impossible to detect. Other than that the stats looked pretty spot on. Anon 612 if we who are sociopaths wanted to we could dox anyone on this blog with ease and go kill them. SUperchick is our friend though as are most of the non-sociopaths on this blog. We actually treasure them and would protect them from others of our ilk because they are special. They are people who know exactly what we are and love us anyway. This rare, so very rare for most sociopaths and we do respect it. High functioning sociopaths are very territorial when it comes to our humans, we will protect them onto death without a second thought even sacrificing ourselves for them. I have reasons I can't share my social media on this page mostly because I am completely open on my other social media and it could endanger my "family". I might someday though. I have been considering it.
DeletePuppy Basket-
DeleteI agree with, and am enjoying all of your posts.:)
I like how you operate-I like your style.:)
I'm glad you are here.:)
I wish I had time to respond to all of your comments, but I'm quite busy at the moment...
I will be reading the blog, and will comment, when I can.:)
~Vegas
The most beautiful present life can make to a sociopath is empathy...
ReplyDeleteimagine someone arguing the opposite of what you propose...
Delete