Hey, just a reminder to people who are interested in having me come visit them, be sure to send me an email rather than just leave a comment in the comment section, or at least give me some indication of how to contact you. I feel like a few of you (Sierra Rae and Peace Dish come to mind, but maybe others) said you were interested, but I don't know if I know how to contact you about it.
Also, I'll be in Australia from 12/9-12/23.
Thanks!
Also, I'll be in Australia from 12/9-12/23.
Thanks!
Per meus femina forlorn:
ReplyDeleteIs it standard English where you come from to use everyone's Roman name, dear? Har har.
I feel as if you are addressing Belligerent the Many, and Sir Re the Femme in your address... (Which goes to show my Latin is bad, because apparently "sierra" is most often a landmass rather than an absurdly Alexandrian way of writing the word "Sir." I blame Cherie C. for my bad Latin habits...) I might be sending you an E-Mail later.
Per magnus magister: moemento moeri et fornicatio bonum. Remember Sir Mortuary and fork-up well...is what my horrendous schoolings says that means. It's a Romanian expression transcribed and transpired by Horace Reynolds the sun god, or per Dark-Game Yugi.]
Post scriptum: I believe I also sent you an unsolicited E-mail of a vulgar and common nature a while ago...I'm sure you've cooled off whether I did or didn't actually send it (I was somewhat maniacal, so maybe it was but an edifying fantasy)...
Yes, I emailed you!
ReplyDeleteMaybe I can't email you with hotmail. I'll retry but I emailed you with contact information.
ReplyDeleteA few thoughts:
ReplyDeleteNeurotypicals sometimes ask how to become sociopaths, how to get rid of their feelings.
I don't think that's possible any more than a sociopath can develop them to the extent a neurotypical experiences them.
Neurotypicals that thwart their emotions end up as narcissists or addicts or maybe schizoid. There are better ways to handle emotions if you actually have them. For the sake of yourself and for those around you.
I would say that after being with **-* I can actually understand why thinks emotional behaviour is manipulative, even though manipulation probably isn't the intent. I can also see now what happens when a neurotypical takes another person's emotions to heart a little too much.
I see emotions as a process, a cycle of informing ourselves of lessons from past pain. It's a risk management process, a process to keep ourselves apprised of where we don't want to be, of where we do want to be. Taken this way, emotions don't need to be interpreted so seriously and they are quite manageable without much effort, both in self and in others around us.
One thing that surprises me a great deal with **-* is that although he doesn't like my emotional behaviour, regarding is as manipulative, he seems not the slightest bit bothered by actual manipulation or use of leverage against him. I have used this a few times as a last resort: he seems totally fine with it, even to the point of enjoying it, I would say. And it gets a result. Honestly staggering to me.
I remember A, and others, encouraging neurotypicals to manipulate. As if that's the expected mode. As though it's a more natural language for interaction.
I suppose in a way it makes sense when seen this way. In not being daunted by it, one can easily see the cards the other person has. There's an odd clarity about the process, things are actually more predictable. Perhaps I'm strange. I do feel quite like a robot thinking this way, but what the heck, it works for me.
"I remember A, and others, encouraging neurotypicals to manipulate. As if that's the expected mode. As though it's a more natural language for interaction."
DeleteEverybody manipulates whether they know it or not. For example, a friend of mine made a post on fb the other day after he had lost his job asking if anyone knew of any job postings etc. While he proceeded to say how upset he was yada yada so he's playing on others sympathy for him in hopes they will get him a job or give him a lead. When someone asks for a raise at work and tells their boss a sob story or when people apply for loans etc. They all do the same shit. Everybody manipulates they just don't admit it.
Do you really see asking someone for assistance as a form of manipulation? I suppose this is where things get tricky. It's all in how you define a concept.
DeleteIt is a really interesting question. Personally, I think for behaviour to be manipulation there must be intent to manoeuvre the other person without their full knowledge.
DeleteEmotional behaviour can prompt actions from others without the planning or need for intent. The result might be the same.
This is why I can see both sides, why I understand how **-* and Bella see emotional behaviour as manipulative.
Of course, people can be emotional and consciously manipulative too. My colleague did this yesterday. He was upset about the way we were behaving in his car, so he came up with a ruse for getting to a company computer so he could lodge a complaint against a fellow for sexually harassing me. He wasn’t interested in me and he’d misheard the comment; but he felt his manhood had been challenged by this other fellow because it happened in his car.
This guy’s job is now at risk, so I wanted to counter this because I quite like the guy and although he was rude to me, I was handling that. Escalation not required. How did I counter? Exactly following my feelings: reaching out to girls on the floor who were allies. They obviously wanted to protect the guy as well, so their emotions prompted them to warn him. Lo and behold, he comes of his own accord to apologise. Now hopefully that’s enough to save him. He says inappropriate things all the time but everyone likes him.
So that’s pretty much how emotional behaviour can prompt action with or without manipulation. I think my colleague who complained was far more in the wrong the guy who said inappropriate things. I gave him information about what had transpired earlier because he made out his interest was my welfare and he used that to injure someone I really quite like. Not to mention the ridiculous process he’s entangled me in.
Rather than addressing his own feelings directly, he’s jumped on a moral high horse and sucked everyone into a vortex of chaos.
Emotional behaviour does create leverage to move people. I think that’s especially what **-* doesn’t like.
DeleteThis is why I refer to them as shortcuts for navigating social situations. The trick is for those shortcuts to take you in the best direction, you have to actually know what the emotion is telling you and be brave enough to listen. It’s very easy to let the head jump in and protect you from your own vulnerability, creating an argument in a different direction. This is emotional behaviour at it’s worst.
What my colleague should have done is say he didn’t accept that behaviour in his car. Or if he really wanted to complain, it should have been about how the comment made him feel rather than bringing me into it. I have told him I think he was mostly upset because the incident happened in his car and he wholeheartedly agreed. The path he has actually followed won’t help him because it doesn’t address the feeling of inadequacy or whatever it was that upset him in the first place. It will be a wild goose chase of bitterness.
"Do you really see asking someone for assistance as a form of manipulation? I suppose this is where things get tricky. It's all in how you define a concept."
DeleteYes, I do only because he added the whole he's upset part. If you're out of a job fine but he's trying to capitalize on the fact that people will feel sorry for him and help poor him if he further explains how bad he feels. So that is what seems like manipulation.
Most people are emotional creatures, and express those emotions. I doubt it was done with intent.
DeleteYea, well I known him in real life and he's an asshole so I doubt that.
DeleteMaybe it's a bit of twisted hero worship type syndrome? Envy, the weird longing...like some tossers longed to be Twilightesque vampires. A deemed jealousy of a lack of feeling, the desire not to care about anyone, the craving of the cold dead eyes.
ReplyDeleteBut it's not all that. Think the vampires like not going out in the sun? Being all pale and sickly? Breaking out into show tunes every 40minutes? (I haven't seen Twilight no).
Having to make a conscious effort to use facial features to put animation into your eyes is something you do habitually, but still something you have to think of. Remembering that, shit, supposed to look upset by here, isn't all that easy, especially as an over active mind sometimes wanders with boredom and can get caught out.
And you don't even get wicked sharp pointy teeth.
It sound like this **-* dude (by the way, I've always wondered but never asked...**-*...are you dating Mr T?) is more annoyed and put out by the emotional show more than the emotional manipulation? I know for me at least, that an emotional showdown makes me incredibly uncomfortable, tears annoy the pants off me (British pants, not Yank pants, which, are actually trousers), maybe what you're deeming as manipulation, he's just seeing as, well, pathetic? Don't forget, Mr T is sociopathic, he won't really get the emotional stand, it'll just come across as irritating?
Or maybe he just needs a nice cup of tea.
As for A and some encouraging neurotypicals to manipulate? Why I do believe she just enjoys the game.
Hey Vegas? Don't listen to BellEnd sweetheart, she has an insatiable ineptitude and craves my attention, and, not being one for double entendres...I like to give it to her
Vampires and Mr T and British v Yank pants? I do enjoy your colourfulness Swop :p
DeleteWhat else has your over-active mind been up to lately?
I would think at your age you would have mastered your abilities. Maybe low functioning? Awww poor baby.
DeleteNorth North North, no no no...you've got it all wrong...there are no such things as Yank pants, they are in fact, normal trousers, which they've named pants. So there is no "V". Easy mistake don't worry.
ReplyDeleteSo what do you scalping avoiders call pants you wear under, your, uh, pants? Pants pants? Sounds like dog speech.
Apart from trying to convince M.E. not to get on the next UK bound flight to meet me (nuff of the begging M, it's getting uncomfortable babes) I can't say I've been up to much.
apart from the usual really...alienating myself from friends and family and preferring my dog to people I meet.
On a side note, me myself won't be stepping foot states side, but a very good friend (read: only friend) is visiting New York, he has a very Welsh name, so I won't confuse you lot, but if you do a thumb and forefinger whistle, he's been pretty well trained to shout 'yo' in response, so if you do happen to see a lost looking Welshman staring up at the massive heights...please be kind enough to whistle in his general direction, if he shouts yo, would you tell him he's taken my locker key with him.
Thanks.
Hey Vegas ;)
Ahem, it would, uh, it would seem that something of an amendment needs to be made on my behalf, since posting the last, well, posts, I have been reliably informed by my exceedingly better half, that you Yankee types call the pants you wear, under, your pants, underpants.
ReplyDeleteI would hereby like to renounce my love of the English language, in light of this new, uh, news, 'tis a silly pompous language and I shall henceforth be embracing the simplistic bastardised version of English called Americaan, or whatever you illiterate fuck fucks call it.
But, good news BellEnd, that's only two steps away from autistic screeching, so, fingers crossed, in a few more months of de-evolving, I may just start getting your jokes dear
Howdy Vegas ;)
Undies, mate?
DeleteUh...Down, undies, mate?
DeletePlease don't judge me too harshly, my Australia gag repertoire isn't what it should be I know.
I have a sister who lives in, uh, fuck knows, but somewhere on your island...apparently it's pretty big? And she do tell me that they don't have jokes in Oz, just lots of serious dudes sweating.
And letter writer dude? Fuck up, it's full of cuddles and smiles...just watch out for the magpies mate, them bitches are proper slags
G'day Vegas
always wanted to go to australia. but heard many stories about the fact that there are many dangerous animals. This is true?
ReplyDeletePfft
Delete@Swop what a fucking douche bag stalker this fuck is. I just read your comment on Alci's website. Jealous much?
Deletehttps://youtu.be/YIq0E396MDY
ReplyDelete