Confessions of a Sociopath author M.E. Thomas interviews BorderlineSane about what it is like to experience borderline personality disorder and thoughts on other things like the baby psychopath fantasy of being nothing at all, the difference between Myers Briggs N's and S's, chicken people, breaking out of the stories we tell ourselves, how political movements intersect with various identities we may have like religion, marijuana induced schizophrenia, inventor of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and fellow BPD sufferer Marsha Linehan, and childhood defense mechanisms expressing themselves in adulthood.
Audio only available: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1wyO6SUewBdCAy0gtf-v65iNoJ_Jsg9pI?usp=sharing
Earlier comment:
ReplyDeleteDo you have any interview videos on being friends with a sociopath?
Tips on concepts worth understanding:
1. There's seemingly no shared journey with a sociopath. Even if working on a long term project or relationship, they will not perceive the journey the way you do. Don't expect them to.
2. Their relational offer is not negotiable in any way. You can say yes or no to it as it stands. And believe me, if it doesn't suit you, say no early. Don't compromise with any expectation of reciprocity - it won't come and they'll think you're weak. Regardless of how counter-intuitive that seems. And this is because they don't have anything like the capacity for trust that others do. Not even a concept of it.
If you do negotiate in some way, they will take back any compromise they made in ways that will probably be painful for you.
3. They don't understand your feelings. Like being confronted with a foreign language spoken aggressively, they'll assume you're up to something adverse and will likely think you're trying to manipulate them.
This concepts aren't easy to operationalise. It's taken me many years to dim my expectations of their capacities. It is possible to do, but it does run very counter to our wiring regarding relationships so I suggest proceeding with eyes wide open as to the tradeoffs.
There's much more to say, but to wrap it up: think of them as having vastly different socio-emotional capabilities. They're in a different world in almost the way another species is. We share many emotional similarities with dogs or dolphins, for example, but don't expect more of them than what they actually are.
For all that is good in this world, don't believe the nonsense that they are somehow superheroes because of muted emotionality. That's cap.
Also, don't worry too much about upsetting them. You are entitled to your life, as are they. They are pretty much take-it-or-leave-it people. Just be yourself and be prepared to 100% handle your own feelings. Process them independently - that's the smoothest path.
Insightful post on the differences between Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Your explanation of the diagnostic criteria and symptoms of each disorder is informative and helpful for those looking to better understand these mental health conditions. I appreciate that you've highlighted the importance of seeking professional help and treatment for those who may be struggling with these disorders. Keep up the great work in raising awareness and providing valuable insights into mental health issues.
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