Author of Confessions of a Sociopath M.E. Thomas speaks with Vintage Ice about self-awareness, the reckoning, weak sense of self, manipulation, relationships, genetic heritage, and getting better.
When my cousins were younger I’d also try to teach them skills I had such as manipulation was good such as one of my cousins would tell the other if they don’t play the same game they wanted to they wouldn’t be their friend while the adults would say it’s wrong n I would secretly tell them to not believe them it’s how the world works just do it but just don’t get caught cause it’s good to use and get what you want from others
When I get bored with my life I crave going back to my old self to hurt and use people I feel it like a hunger deep down n my gf will notice me being rude to others out n about when they show little or even no attitude ill destroy their looks or how they act n ill laugh n she will call me out n i play it as they deserve it
I always have anterior motives I love it I try to plan everything like when I left my ex wife I had a plan originally to have her arrested so I could take everything n then I tried to convince the girl that lived their she was prostituting out n when she just left I found someone to let me move in when that plan fell apart I made a new to just leave it all go. When I was living with my ex wife I would play both sides n it was fun for me cause I had all proof it was happening I just couldn’t get her to stand up to her n also I play victim to get sympathy to move my plans ahead n jump from person to person. At times I get heartless like when my father was alive he was my jimony cricket so when he passed I lost it n reverted back hard to be really cold n heartless n it was fun but I destroyed my relationships I realized I have to self regulate I hate it but I need to n I crave destruction n the words I use is like I feel the need to sink my teeth into a rabbis dog needing to sink my teeth into meat
I am sociopathic does any of yall ever with when raising your children you were the only parent so they could be raised solely to get your skills instead of the empathetic parent that tries to raise them with emotions of oh you have to not manipulate or oh you need to express your self? For me it’s like if I express myself I will destroy all in my sight n it is fun while it lasts until nobody wants to be destroyed cause I find it funny n satisfying to do it and see them come back like I think I can change them or I just can’t get enough of them (meaning me) I love the sight of someone being mine like my ex gfs comming back after a year bringing back all my stuff they had (I forgot about) n then saying if you tell me you love me I’ll leave my fiancé for you n me being like oh sounds fun let’s go for it
It’s tiring to never unmask I partly do with my current gf but my father was my only one who I would fully unmask n since he passed cause white my current friends and gf ill test the waters and they freak out with options or how I am when they ask me questions they get butt hurt and I get mad cause then I got to recover n so I just be myself in my cold self but literally let none of my thoughts out which is infuriating and I get bored with my life at times
I think people do not understand that kind of life can be very boring. Maybe they are motivated with movies about psycho who is always smiling. But it’s not. It’s just always question why people are doing such and such. I still cant understand why they are yelling, but I know how to make them yelling😂 But adrenaline kicks it’s interesting 😂
I am trying to I find some contact information. I am like you and I can provide everything for validation. After researching you I found how you suffered with your attempt at honesty. I offer anonymity and seek understanding. I'm a hyper aware AUDHD psychopath. I know the risks involved for both of us and am fine leaving every communication with intentional ambiguity for ourselves. The how to connect is the problem I face. Be cryptic and vague I'll understand.
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When my cousins were younger I’d also try to teach them skills I had such as manipulation was good such as one of my cousins would tell the other if they don’t play the same game they wanted to they wouldn’t be their friend while the adults would say it’s wrong n I would secretly tell them to not believe them it’s how the world works just do it but just don’t get caught cause it’s good to use and get what you want from others
ReplyDeleteWhen I get bored with my life I crave going back to my old self to hurt and use people I feel it like a hunger deep down n my gf will notice me being rude to others out n about when they show little or even no attitude ill destroy their looks or how they act n ill laugh n she will call me out n i play it as they deserve it
ReplyDeleteI always have anterior motives I love it I try to plan everything like when I left my ex wife I had a plan originally to have her arrested so I could take everything n then I tried to convince the girl that lived their she was prostituting out n when she just left I found someone to let me move in when that plan fell apart I made a new to just leave it all go. When I was living with my ex wife I would play both sides n it was fun for me cause I had all proof it was happening I just couldn’t get her to stand up to her n also I play victim to get sympathy to move my plans ahead n jump from person to person. At times I get heartless like when my father was alive he was my jimony cricket so when he passed I lost it n reverted back hard to be really cold n heartless n it was fun but I destroyed my relationships I realized I have to self regulate I hate it but I need to n I crave destruction n the words I use is like I feel the need to sink my teeth into a rabbis dog needing to sink my teeth into meat
ReplyDeleteI am sociopathic does any of yall ever with when raising your children you were the only parent so they could be raised solely to get your skills instead of the empathetic parent that tries to raise them with emotions of oh you have to not manipulate or oh you need to express your self? For me it’s like if I express myself I will destroy all in my sight n it is fun while it lasts until nobody wants to be destroyed cause I find it funny n satisfying to do it and see them come back like I think I can change them or I just can’t get enough of them (meaning me) I love the sight of someone being mine like my ex gfs comming back after a year bringing back all my stuff they had (I forgot about) n then saying if you tell me you love me I’ll leave my fiancé for you n me being like oh sounds fun let’s go for it
ReplyDeleteIt’s tiring to never unmask I partly do with my current gf but my father was my only one who I would fully unmask n since he passed cause white my current friends and gf ill test the waters and they freak out with options or how I am when they ask me questions they get butt hurt and I get mad cause then I got to recover n so I just be myself in my cold self but literally let none of my thoughts out which is infuriating and I get bored with my life at times
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI think people do not understand that kind of life can be very boring. Maybe they are motivated with movies about psycho who is always smiling. But it’s not.
It’s just always question why people are doing such and such. I still cant understand why they are yelling, but I know how to make them yelling😂
But adrenaline kicks it’s interesting 😂
I am trying to I find some contact information. I am like you and I can provide everything for validation. After researching you I found how you suffered with your attempt at honesty. I offer anonymity and seek understanding. I'm a hyper aware AUDHD psychopath. I know the risks involved for both of us and am fine leaving every communication with intentional ambiguity for ourselves. The how to connect is the problem I face. Be cryptic and vague I'll understand.
ReplyDeleteThe email is in a tab at the top of the website, ask a sociopath or something.
DeleteAre all narcisssts sociopaths
ReplyDelete